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Most guys will have no problem with a FMF but will throw a fit on the subject of MFM.
There's no intrinsic problem with that (liking FFM but not MMF). If you don't like to have another guy in your bed, it's still not unethical to just have FFM threesomes.
The thing you were hinting at, as far as your response reads, is inequality in boundaries. Most people I know who practice openness in any degree, have equal boundaries in their relationship. Most smartasses who learn about this openness come up with the "Yeah but you wouldn't like your partner doing that, would you?" argument. Hence my "geez."
That being said some open couples have different boundaries for the two partners, and that seem reasonable too. After all, a woman can have sex with way less effort than a guy, or often a guy will have a stronger impulse to have sex outside the primary relationship, so there are "natural" imbalances between the two partners, that a difference of boundaries can take into account.
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I think cheating is just betraying your partners trust according to what ever ground rules you made.
A lot of people mentioned boundaries or ground rules, though the funny thing is, close to zero couple actually discuss these rules and boundaries.
CHAT
