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Question about any one that you know that did pickup and got married.
Did they ever say something was different/special about the girl that the eventually married compared to other girls?
Just Curious
Alright well I have just a month or so to go before I'm married but since the tuxes are rented, the venue is payed for and stuff, and I'm living with her I'd say it should count.
Anyways yes there was definitely something different and special about my fiance' than previous women I have been around. This coming from someone who has slept around a lot, and went through years of messing around with women.
First change was in myself. I was tired and unsatisfied with just picking up and sleeping with women or juggling a few girls from time to time. Granted it kept me busy and some of my needs were being met but not the one for a relationship. Ultimately I got into all this so I could find "the one" but until then I'd have fun. I realized I had put all my effort into just having fun and nothing much into really figuring out what kind of woman I wanted for long term and attracting her. Like most things I wrote down what I wanted.
Second change was coming to grips with what I wanted in a relationship. I don't mean all that HB rating scale but seriously what qualities were important to me. After being around a lot of women and married once before I think my list of what I didn't want was longer than what I did want. I definitely knew what I was attracted to and what qualities I wanted. I won't get into it since it differs for everyone.
Third change was also coming to grips with the fact I wasn't 22 something anymore. I had hit 29 and I realized a lot of the good women out there may have kids and quite possibly had been married already. You really have to look at someone twice at someone who is 30 and hasn't been in a serious committed relationship yet as there is usually something that is going on there. This goes for men as well as women.
After setting my general expectations and coming to a few realizations about where to find them. Most of the types of women I wanted to married wouldn't be out at the local bars unless they had a friend getting married or out celebrating someone's birthday. I did A LOT of online game so I was very comfortable with the idea that I could meet and attract someone from online. I started to be able to cold read women based on their profiles and was pretty good at it. In addition to that I was going to concentrate on attracting people I randomly met during the day as well but online was definitely going to pay off better for me.
Anyways, after some dating and some really hard screening and some months I found her. She was 6 months out of a divorce, had two great kids, taught school, my type physically, supported by hobbies, and was in my area but a little bit of a drive. Luckily, her mother and sister lived closed to where I did at the time so she was frequently in the area visiting her family.
We had our first date on St. Patrick's day 2012 after a lot of talking on the phone and me grilling her. Being fresh out of a divorce she was very skeptical and was in a "man hating" mode, she called it "being reserved." Her being skeptical and reserved was one of the main things that started really hooking me in. I'd seen so many women be seduced by me and other men without them hardly thinking about it. While she was very attracted to me, she was also serious about protecting her kids, and her heart too. Her ability to separate her emotions from logic turned me on as well. Anyways, I knew pretty quick I loved her.
Took me a while to pop the question because I had some trust issues I had to work through first. After going out and pulling single night lays from single women and women who lie about being single for years I had a hard time trusting women, also my previous marriage ended in her cheating, so I had to wait until I built more trust first.
Sorry for the long reply.