Fell hard for a girl at work in NYC who was very flirty with me. We informally dated for a bit but she didn't want to be exclusive or serious, and I was moving anyway to another city and she was going to London. I had VERY bad case of oneitis and gave her WAY too much attention, which of course made her lose interest. She then friendzoned me. I did so MANY amateur things, and I've been working on my game since…

I moved away to take a new job, but ended up hating the new job + city so I'm rejoining my old company where we used to work together. The only opening was in London, so I expect to come across this girl again since we'll both be in same city at same company again albeit this time in Europe. We don't work in same area any more, so I will thankfully not have to see her or interact with her at work.

Since moving away, I stopped ever talking to this girl even though we used to talk multiple times a day… I way overinvested before while she was gaming me and not giving me enough attention. Question:
-Should I tell her I'm moving to London and rejoining the firm? I gave away too much of my power before to her. I think I was too beta because I knew she’d been raped, but she walked over me.
-She'll probably be mad at me if she knows I moved to London and didn't talk with her, but kind of think just showing up is the alpha move and then playing it like its no big deal if I come across her. I like this girl and kind of want to be her friend, but I don't want to be an AFC who is a slave. London’s a big city with plenty of hot women so that's where my focus will be.
-If I don't reach out, what do I say when she runs into me at work and asks why I didn’t reach out? I think I don't tell her in advance and just play it cool when she comes across me.

Go gentle please… I’m absolutely brand new to the forum and this is my first post. I have been working on my game since this girl messed with my head, but I’m definitely still an amateur learning the art.

Man you are wayyyyy to up in your head just be direct with her. Tell her your moving back and wanna catch up IF you hang out and she puts you in the friend zone, flirt with other girls around her to get out of it.


Remember to always be authentic; don't back down from your word, and don't be needy.

Just treat her as you would any normal person. Would you reach out if this were a friend?

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I wouldn't say a word.
It'd be far more attractive to just move and run into her as though you DIDN'T put thought into how she feels about where you are.. It's that thinking that got you where you are with her, by all means think it, but do what YOU want. Prioritise yourself