Hello everybody.

So there is a girl that I miss a lot. Although we didn't spend that much time together, we didn't even have a sex. But there was something that I loved about her. So much similarities to my own person. However we had no contact during holidays and her friend started dating her. Unfortunately for me, she lives now close to me, because she's studying here, yet she still goes back to her hometown on weekends.

After the holidays and the break, we started seeing each other frequently, started dating again but all the time there was that friend. Our last days were fine and before the New Year she told me she doesn't feel anything to me (obvious bullshit). I tried dating other girls but without a success because I have that old in mind. What can I do to pull her back? We stopped talking but from time to time I feel this ache and suffer a little. Strill trying with other girls but I'm afraid I will not meet a right one for a long time, like I didnt meet any before her.

Why did you stop hanging out with her? Was it because she told you that she had no feelings?

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She told me via Facebook that. We had a great time before Christmas. Everything was going well. However before we had problems because of her feelings for me and that other guy. So sometimes she would just refuse me (especially after weekends) coming because she didn't want to hurt him? Or cheat on him? I guess so. The point is, I knew about that guy because she told me after holidays. I don't exactly remember how we started dating again but sometimes she would remind me that we're not that friends becasue we are something more but she can't because there is another guy. Sounds curious.

I guess I should just move to the shadow, doing nothing. She's still in her hometown, and after New Year she posted some photos with that guy on IG so I might be wrong but they seem to be a couple.

Anyway what I find strange and odd, we acted like a couple till Christmas, she went to her hometown and week later she told me she has no feelings for me. Crazy or just woman?

She has a boyfriend and she's trying to be a good girlfriend. You can do whatever you want because when you have access to her, he's nowhere near.

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Move on. Even if she's as great as you say, there are tons of great girls out there who don't have boyfriends. Find someone who is unattached, you'll be off to a much better start. Go out more, try online dating, join clubs, etc. to meet more people. It's just a matter of time before you meet a girl that makes you forget about this one.

You have never fucked her?

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

How do people get so attached to someone they haven't even been intimate with? to any degree?

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Because once you've had sex with a girl you become at least slightly less attached, in my opinion. The chase is powerful. I can easily understand why guys become invested in girls they haven't slept with, even if it's obviously not a good idea

From the want to do so. Remember, not all guys can fuck a girl as quickly as you probably can. It's like you said before, men are more invested before sex. I used to be the same, and it's fucking frustrating to look back on. So many fucked up situations. I once agreed to raise a kid that wasn't mine with a girl I'd never slept with. The pregnancy came from cheating on me, twice. Turned out she was lying about the pregnancy to keep all 3 of us interested in her and get attention. The kid would've been black, so obviously not mine lol.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

Damn, I'll bet that serves as a powerful lesson to you in hindsight?

Oh yea. I was thinking about it earlier actually, and I'm genuinely glad it happened. It was the first step towards this pick up side of my life. I learned a lot of bad shit but at least I learned, lol. Was all "no contact rule to get your ex back" and jealousy plots and shit like that. I made a fake Facebook profile of a girl to make her jealous with. Short term gold, long term depressing. Then after my next break up I really dived into this stuff and it's genuinely one of the best things I ever did.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

until you cleanse your mind of those thoughts you'll end up dwelling on her. It's not her, it's you. Trust me I've been there. Dwelled on exes for years. My cure was Asian women at the source.

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Love this.

LEt me ask you something... did you find that some of them came crawling back once you'd got your shit together? If so, was it hard to "turn them down" cause they were somehow still magically on a bit of a pedestal due to all the investment from your past?

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

The something that you loved about her is your damaged ego from not receiving a return of investment on a girl that you invested so much thought, energy, and time into. You gave her what she wanted " energy, time, attention, validation" and weren't able to get an adequate amount of what you want "sex, affection, commitment" and so you're allowing that to create the illusion that you're actually more interested in her than you are.

We've all had this happen. Its also the girl that we invest so much into that we don't bang, or don't bang well, or don't get to fully hook that we think there was something we loved about. Its an illusion.

You can still get her if you want, but don't make the mistake of thinking that there is more to this than there actually is. Theres one girl that I still think about after two years every now and then. And its this hot ass chick that I spent a week hanging out with who had just gotten out of a relationship. And right as we were about to have sex, her ex boyfriend called and she got emotional, got dressed, and stormed out my place half naked. I thought she was special too. But the truth is. I invested a week into her, talked her through some of her issues, she was sexy as hell, and I just didn't get my return. Thats enough to fool anyone unexperienced.

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