Man who has something to say



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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 3:20 pm 
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You know these men. Maybe you are one of these. They have plenty of experiences and big base of knowledge and are able to talk about very interesting things in very engaging way.

My question isn't what to say. I think it has been discussed many times. I am curious about what you think about being a man who has something to say. What are the things and experiences which lead you to be this man?

e.g. I think it's a lot about traveling and reading.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 5:50 pm 
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The Grand Puba
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A man can have a lot to say and still not get laid. Focus on seduction and not what other guys do in social settings.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 5:54 pm 
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People rely too much on talking, people should talk less and DO more instead

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 10:20 pm 
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People rely too much on talking, people should talk less and DO more instead
OK, I'll try to explain myself. I'm trying to do some DG instead of NG only, so I though that I should work on this because a lot of my approaches in day ended up like me having nothing to say because I was unable to find commonalities in first few minutes (and asking a tone of question to find one seems lame to me). In DG I have this feeling that I have nothing to hide behind, I just must talk but you know.. I can't hold engaging conversation. In NG I can go out, go dance, go for drinks, go to this quiet corner, I can back go to my friends for two minutes and than come back to a girl. It seems so much different to me.

I appreciate your advise because I know you have much better skill than I have. However does this apply to DG too? Should I bounce with a girl, be physical, try to go for a kiss before date? I was rather focused on talking but I can try it.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2015 10:24 pm 
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The Coach
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Certain people aren't going to find certain things interesting. Other people might find them interesting. Not giving a shit which way people think is key.

You starting to "read and travel" to please everyone is only going to come off as needy. Live life on your own terms. Do fun shit. Be open to doing new things. You'll naturally become an interesting person.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2015 12:21 am 
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Travel, read, check documentaries, talk with a lot of people, be curious and most importantly, try to hang out with interesting people and ask them questions. Observe them and try to rocognise their conversational patterns. What they say, when, how... And apply those things yourself

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 03, 2015 11:38 am 
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Experiences.

Its about actually breaking from your comfort zones, going through pain, and living to tell about it. Books can give you the information, but only experience will give you the charisma that makes people want to sit down and listen.

No one listens to the desk cops office stories, but they'll listen to the field cop talk about his experiences all day. Because things were actually on the line for his.

Approaching women is a good place to start. But this is about being willing to get uncomfortable period. And dealing with the pain of doing so.

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 03, 2015 11:45 am 
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Certain people aren't going to find certain things interesting. Other people might find them interesting. Not giving a shit which way people think is key.

You starting to "read and travel" to please everyone is only going to come off as needy. Live life on your own terms. Do fun shit. Be open to doing new things. You'll naturally become an interesting person.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 05, 2015 11:00 am 
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Who is more persuasive, the guy who is dirt poor who talks about wealth building or the guy who is a multi-millionaire?

Who is more attractive to women, the guy who nags, bitches about and runs to his mother's skirt when challenged or the guy who takes action, works out on the regular, and takes responsibility for his actions, right or wrong?

It isn't about reading or traveling, OP. It's about integrity and congruence. A man who has integrity and congruence is the more persuasive assuming his gift of gab and wit are equal to the man who does not have integrity and congruence.

Of course, the audience demographic is a big factor too. Men who nag and bitch about are likely to be more comfortable with the guy who also nags and bitches about.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 05, 2015 11:27 am 
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To BE interesting, BE engrossed in the world, in the other person, in your own future. You could have spent your life in a cave but if you come out enthralled with the world, others will feel that energy and respond to it.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 05, 2015 11:55 am 
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Quote:
Experiences.

Its about actually breaking from your comfort zones, going through pain, and living to tell about it. Books can give you the information, but only experience will give you the charisma that makes people want to sit down and listen.

No one listens to the desk cops office stories, but they'll listen to the field cop talk about his experiences all day. Because things were actually on the line for his.

Approaching women is a good place to start. But this is about being willing to get uncomfortable period. And dealing with the pain of doing so.
Eddie got this right. It's not about how much you read. You will never learn anything if you read the manuals first. When you get a new video game, do you read the whole manual and just magically beat the game the first time? Hell no!! You play a little, then read the manual, play more, read more, etc. until you eventually can beat it without effort...Then get a new game.

That's what this is. Eventually reading only makes you live a life of potential instead of absolution. You live within an imaginary world of stories about yourself, and ideas never realized. You'll imagine doing something, and never truly experiencing them. in your imagination, you'll never get turned down or embarrassed, but you'll never live! you'll never do anymore than you are right now. Don't get stuck in potential. too many people are told they have 'potential' to do this or that, without ever realizing it. How many people were told "you have such potential!" but are 40 years old, still a virgin, and living in their mom's basement? You gotta get off your ass, out the door, push the envelope, get out of your comfort zone, and LEARN the right way!

You have to get comfortable with discomfort. By that I mean, when you start getting comfortable...Get scared because you're not living up to the lifestyle you deserve. You're not pushing yourself hard enough. But also, don't take on more than you can chew. take little bites at game, life, confidence, etc. and you will see yourself change towards your goal. If you get good at game, everything else in your life will get better too. But you have to build a solid foundation.

There is no magic pill, no overnight psychy change, no quick fix, and no end to it all. You have to take it in stride. You have to work on YOU. When you get a girl, it's not to get the girl (I know that sounds strange), It's to choose the girl. With the right foundation of yourself, you will get to the point that you're not there to amuse her, or get validation from her, or others...it's for your own amusement, your own validation, to give yourself choices. You will see that just because she's beautiful, she may or may not be what you want. and you will have the options to pick and choose what makes YOU happy.

If you're going to travel, do it for you! not for the validation of others. would you rather have the experiences because they built you up to the man you are, or to just brag about? experiences are for yourself, even if you never tell anyone about what you did, or where you went, you know you did and you'll be richer for it. there's a saying, "a rich man doesn't have to tell you he's rich". That's the point. don't do shit to have bragging rights, do them for yourself. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, only to yourself.

I've been doing pickup for years, even before I knew what pick up was (I have found correlations between pick up and my old way of just getting women), I've had some good and bad relationships through the years, traveled all over the US, lived in 21 states, been to college twice, and have a 9 year old daughter. I don't brag about it all, I use it to build myself up. l and if there's one thing that I have learned through it all, it's that experiences, sights and feelings, PUA, this community, and the game in general is for US not the women. If it was for them, then they would be doing the posting. It's to help us grow as men, to instill our own confidence, and to build our own self beliefs that we get what we deserve and we deserve the best. and we all have our own perceptions of the best, so use your imagination.

So, in conclusion...work on yourself, get out of your comfort zone and stay there, only read when you have experiences to base them on, build a good foundation, and never say "i'm good enough" because the way of the man is to constantly grow and evolve.
"The longest Journey begins with a single step" --Bruce Lee

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