So a girl I was pretty sure had lost interest in me just asked me out… which is exciting b/c I genuinely like her and think we have a connection. I just didn't think I killed it when we went out the first time - she laughed at all my jokes, great eye contact, great conversation, similar interests… but I was all wishy-washy when it came to taking the conversation to a new direction. I was sorta panicking and just trying to keep my head above water… not screw it up, as they say.

We are going to meet for coffee tomorrow morning. What I need to know is: the transition from small talk to hitting on her… like, letting my intentions be known with subtlety… flirting with her and creating sexual tension… this type of stuff. Tips? Advice? Topics of conversation that have worked for anyone?

Very green, just "woke up" yesterday and realized I had to start making a concerted effort to change and improve myself and my life… best way I know to learn is to learn from other people who have the knowledge/skills that I desire… so please, anything will make me feel more equipped. Even if you write and tell me I'm being a wuss and over-thinking the whole thing…. If you think hearing it will be of benefit, say it.

Hug or kiss her hello, sit next to her not across from her (can start out across but shortly thereafter say 'this is too much like an interview' and sit next to her), be touchy/feely in a socially calibrated way; don't look at your hand when you touch her; for a man who is used to touching a woman it is second nature for him; women want to be desired. DON'T DO IT IF IT DOESN'T FEEL NATURAL.

Talk about light topics no sports/politics/work/etc.

She should have ideally known in the first 2 secs of meeting you what your intentions are from your eye contact/tonality/body language alone. Relax and don't put pressure on yourself. But for the love of all that's sacred don't make it a business meeting or an interview.

Flirty banter.

Dude, if he's a newbie there's no way it will feel natural. Let him do it.

Just don't be straight up creepy. How hard can it be?

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Don't be creepy is exactly right: If he feels weird about it she sure as fuck will. So he needs to act like it's no big deal.

Along those lines, if there is no vibing going on and the girl is not feeling it at all DON'T BE CREEPING HER WITH YOUR HANDS, it would be the height of awkward non-calibration.

Maybe have a date that leads to sex. Is this even on your mind at all?

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Read: viewtopic.php?f=25&t=190620

You're trying to keep your head above water is a fear that you're not good enough. Good enough to sit a simple table across from another human being and have a conversation. Had you been aware of the amount of abundance that is actually out there, none of this "keeping your head above water " talk would of even surfaced. Cause you could easily walk out of the restaurant or coffee shop and go on an instant date with a woman smoking the cigarette directly outside. With a line as simple as " Hey, would you like to have coffee with me? " I'd say you have a 4 out of 10 shot of getting a yes so long as its delivered confidently with eye contact.

Its one girl, one date,.. Who the hell cares if it doesn't go in your favor? There hasn't even been much investment on either of your parts.

A woman is looking for a man she can lean on and depend on emotionally. Someone to safe guard her. You should be interviewing her to make sure she is worthy of your protection. Not the other way around.

Just go on the date man.. If it works great, if not.. what difference does it make? You'll be in the same place you were before the date.

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Best advice i could give a begginer, dont overcomplicate something natural

Tips : Have fun and dont be a pussy. Thats ALL you need. Trust me.

Or you can choose path number 2 which means READ 100000000 theories of how to attract girls
Get to the date nervous as fuck
Attempt a "Routine"
Nervous as fuck
Creep the girl out
Never see her again

Come back to the forum asking a bunch of stupid questions and do it all over again.


Which will you choose? lol

Exactly.

Save yourself the trouble.

Ill explain why having a clear mind and enjoying yourself, showing her a good time and just not being a pussy works:

....................................................

The real work happens outside the date on your PERSONAL time

Are you improving yourself?
Are you healthy?
Are you positive?
Are you awsome?

or

Are you a cave troll who's going out on his first date and NEEDS her approval to feel human again?

...the date is simple.

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