I like this girl a lot. We have known each other for about a month now. We have done a lot together like,
gone to amusement parks, hikes, along with other activities. We have also been extremely close to having sex. Because of all of this i feel like we have a strong connection, and enjoy each other's company.

What i tend to notice though is that i'm always the one setting up our interactions. It's not even just with her though, with a lot of girls i feel likes i'm the one always setting everything up and saying, "Hey let's chill" rather than it being visa versa, where they ask me to hang out.

I guess it's starting to make me feel like i'm not entertaining enough, because i feel like if i was i would have more girl messaging me to hang out?

I know i could completely be over thinking this or it might be a bad question, and that's why i wanted to ask you guys. It's kind of starting to bother me.

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As long as girls are NOT flaking on you, then you're on the right track.

Personally though, I have girls asking me out and me setting the dates. I flake sometimes on those girls who ask me out and girls flake on me sometimes for those I ask out.

If you want to improve your personal brand so girls ask you out, I think these are the traits that work in my favor (and hopefully, these will work for you as well):

1. Non-judgmental.
2. Fun and playful (I do not entertain girls. I mock them in a fun, playful way. Definitely, not insulting.)
3. Calm and nonchalant.
4. I speak their language. Try to mirror some of the words they use without expense to your masculinity.

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Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html

With few exceptions, women are not the aggressor. This is not because they are not interested but more so because of their genetic make up. It's been that way for ever. It turns them on when a man takes control, when a man shows interest. The key is to re-balance yourself when you finally >get her alone,< this is all that matters.


Fuck her really good and you better believe she will be the one trying to set up the next meet.

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Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

If you're constantly asking her to hang out, why would she? She knows you will.

That's neither good nor bad. But if you want her to ask you let 5-6 days pass and she probably will.

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A woman is only going to do what she has to man. If she doesn't have to set up the dates because you'll do it for her why would she? Most people are only going to do what they have to do to get the attention they're working for. IF they don't think you're entertaining its a large result to YOU not thinking you're entertaining. It is your own insecurities that are determining how she feels about you.

Their are plenty of confident guys with terrible jokes that keep women laughing all night. And you know why the women laugh? Because the guy believes his bad jokes are funny. The woman is being influenced by the frame that is the most dominating. If her frame is more dominate than sure than she will be the determiner of what is funny and what isn't, she will be the LEADING force. Now if yours is the most dominating than you will determine what goes on. YOU will be the leading force - which is exactly what she wants.

You want the girl to setup a date? You have to first stop setting them up. Realize who you are. Pull back.. Chat when they chat and leave it to them. If they don't, then its their loss. They're the ones missing out on an opportunity with an awesome guy. Without this frame there will be no incentive for them to do so. 9 times out of 10 a guy is only going to wear a uniform to work if its required. Require her to wear the uniform for her position, and if she doesn't then she is unfit for the great pay that you have to offer.

It is through this mindset that the results you want will begin to come about.

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A woman is only going to do what she has to man. If she doesn't have to set up the dates because you'll do it for her why would she? Most people are only going to do what they have to do to get the attention they're working for. IF they don't think you're entertaining its a large result to YOU not thinking you're entertaining. It is your own insecurities that are determining how she feels about you.

Their are plenty of confident guys with terrible jokes that keep women laughing all night. And you know why the women laugh? Because the guy believes his bad jokes are funny. The woman is being influenced by the frame that is the most dominating. If her frame is more dominate than sure than she will be the determiner of what is funny and what isn't, she will be the LEADING force. Now if yours is the most dominating than you will determine what goes on. YOU will be the leading force - which is exactly what she wants.

You want the girl to setup a date? You have to first stop setting them up. Realize who you are. Pull back.. Chat when they chat and leave it to them. If they don't, then its their loss. They're the ones missing out on an opportunity with an awesome guy. Without this frame there will be no incentive for them to do so. 9 times out of 10 a guy is only going to wear a uniform to work if its required. Require her to wear the uniform for her position, and if she doesn't then she is unfit for the great pay that you have to offer.

It is through this mindset that the results you want will begin to come about.

_________________
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Yes you set the dates!

All women want to do is show up looking hot. You should be calling her roughly once a week, setting a date (something fun and in the evening) and taking her on the mysterious adventure why complain? It's a good thing.

However, as her attraction for you goes up, she'll start initiating and wanting to see you more often - which means she'll put herself in your orbit and give you the opportunity to set dates more often.

It's beautiful.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

Don't worry about it dude.

In general I set up the logistics alot of the time unless it's just a "come over and hang" out type thing.

If I have one girl I'm into at the moment and we are contacting eachother on a regular basis and talking regularly then I mostly set things up. And alot of the time the girl will just let that happen.

I'm talking with a few different girls and not giving any of them alot of attention then I notice I get alot more "hey we need to do something" or "there's a party this weekend" type texts.

It's just how it is, not good or bad. If you are setting things up and the girl is happy then your good. If you stop focusing on her and pay less attention and she's into you then she might step up a bit and fill the gap by trying to initiate dates.

All this was great advice, thank you guys. Reading all of it really helped me to snap back into being centered with myself.

_________________
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My most helpful mentors:
Much thanks too;
Eddie Fews
PEBBLE
R.C.

You shouldn't rely a girl on setting up the date, just like you shouldn't rely on a girl approaching you. You need to be the one taking action and leading.

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I think it depends on your goal.

The only way I might initiate a date with a guy is if my interest level is above 90%. Even then, it's not a sure thing. I have to feel brave and be pretty sure he'll say yes.

If it's 51%-90%, I'll likely say yes but I'm not going to initiate no matter how much he holds back. He just won't see me again.

Waiting for a woman to initiate is not a good way to increase the amount of sex you're having. However, it might be a good way to screen out women who aren't very interested. And when you hold back, your desirability goes up even more. So 90% interest level may skyrocket to 98%.

Any woman above 50% will tactically put herself in your orbit and drop hints for you to set up a date, but actually setting the date up herself, that's a different thing.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

Interest level also tells you what she's up for. If she's actually interested and not just bored, asking her on crappy dates is more effective. Because a girl who's not really into you, will not come over to your place to watch a movie, cook, or play assassin's creed. But she might go to a concert with you.

One good mental test I created. Ask yourself the following "If a random, but average dude, asked me if I wanted to do this with him, for free[whatever his reason, you're not afraid he's trying to murder/rape you, etc]; would you say yes? If so, the date is too cool to take a woman on, the first time. Invite her to something more lame.

The sole exception being inviting a girl who's only mildly interested to a cool party with you. Yes, she may make out with some other dude, but your odds improve a lot if you handle it right.

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RSDTyler

Do you not prefer to just keep it as a mystery to the girl? Take her to numerous places in one night: First go and play some pool to get the banter going and get familiar with eachother, then go and have some fun in the arcade, then go and get something to eat... maybe go see a movie after it all... you get the idea.

Makes her feel like she knows you better than she does, cause it's like multiple dates in one night, plus she never knew what was going to happen, it was like a little fairytale right before her eyes (y'know what women are like, they love that shit) you get less flakes when you don't tell them your plans.

_________________
I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

I don't know what types of guys you're dating, but after the first few dates the women I talk to are usually asking me when they're going to see me again. I can pretty much cruise control after the initial chase. Perhaps you just aren't being inspired with strong enough emotion.

Any chick with the "he just won't see me again" attitude just won't be seen again. Plenty of other women willing to do what some aren't. I'm still winning at the end of the day.

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