Quote:
I could very well be reading the situation wrong and/or merely having some sort of mental masturbation for an ego gratification. Yet I don't really think I am.
I see so many, how do I get this girl back posts on here. Point is that eventually they could very well be yours again. Hopefully you will have learned some lessons and moved on.
I want men to have more confidence in themselves and their desirability toward women. For even the ones who may have rejected you at some point, could very well chase you down the road.
Truth is that many middle aged married women are quite unhappy in their marriages. Men my age usually grow bald, get fat and let themselves go. Most married men also give up on sex. They prefer porn to the real thing and stop paying attention to their wives. This makes women even more miserable.
Therefore, the pool for desirable mates will shrink at a much faster rate for women than men, as it is much easier for a middle aged man to score a 20-30 something year old than the other way around. So when you keep yourself up, your value compared to your peers can skyrocket as you get older, especially since men die at a faster pace then women. I have noticed a significant shift over the years in favorable opportunities for me as I get older.
I have learned through pick up to assume attraction and it has played out for me to be true more times than not. I have a good friend who also is in fairly good shape and has pretty much experienced a similar transformation in perspective. We were both not all that popular or lucky with women in our younger years and now we both feel like the captain of the high school football team. Perhaps it is the confidence life experience has given us, my greater situational awareness through studying PUA, but no doubt physical attraction plays a roll, as do the dynamics of middle age.
While it has been trivialized on here and used to poke fun at me, married women my age do not generally send their ex husbands friend requests on facebook. I have no doubt she wants more than to exchange texts and catch up on facebook.
So in summary, value yourself.
Good job man, seems you have your act together and living a fulfilling life which improved as you got older.
Your original post made you misunderstood. I would like to expand on the thing about it that made everyone blast you and how it came across. Read it from a neutral point of view. That is because it had the following information:
1) Saying that you ditched your wife 20 years ago because of inappropriate behaviour.
2) You met her friend who is a common acquaintance.
3) The friend added you on facebook.
4) Your ex-wife added you on facebook later on also.
5) It has been 20 years since the whole thing.
6) You said about learning a life lesson and being the shit and were very proud that she added you on facebook.
7) Keep working on in your life and improve.
It did not have any indication for a life lesson because after 20 years each one has gone on their own separate ways and a facebook request could mean anything after all this long time. There is definitely still some interest on you maybe finding out how you are doing or something more.
For example I thought about it a few times to send a friend request to an ex girlfriend living in another continent and who totally loved me (but I wasn't in love with her), only from a totally friendly point of view because she is a genuinely nice person. We are not facebook friends for the last 5 years and the relationship ended 5.5 years ago when I left the country.
CHAT
