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Well I'm 30 and most of my friends are married or in couples. They don't go out much like they used to. I'm finding it really difficult to meet new girls I'm really shy too which doesn't help. I use online websites but it doesn't seem to be going anywhere. When I ask a girl out online they just vanish. I've met quite a few girls online in the past but it's never worked out. I'm looking for new ways it's really getting me down I just don't feel like I'll ever meet anyone.
I would say I'm a pretty good looking guy who also works out but can't seem to get anyone. Any tips would be useful.
Online's a challenge these days. A lot of guys are far more brazen online than they are face-to-face, and I firmly believe its far easier to 'game' women offline and better to for a variety of reasons (you see them right away rather than get an idea of how they look through photos which can easily be manipulated, you can feel if the vibes there or not, it takes more balls to approach a woman offline which makes you look more attractive and polarizes them more quickly, etc). Attractive women get flooded with messages from all sorts of guy online, sometimes well over 50 an hour - I know because my female friends show me the proof. Lotta creeps, douches, needy guys, VERY few guys who are engaging and grab their attention - that said you need to put some sorta effort into your message that'll pull her in, and often times yes conversation just hit dead ends or the girl drops off. Its like a cat with all these shiny toys, its attention is getting pulled every which way - this is not how it is offline unless you're in a club and she's getting attention by every guy in the place - but whatever I'm hoping you're past the club phase as its very rare to meet a quality girl in a club.
It's fine if you're shy, and frankly who isn't afraid of rejection. The difference between those who succeed with women vs those who fail is that the successful guys don't get bogged down by rejection - they don't personalize it (she doesnt know you so she can't reject you, really). Rejections a part of life, listen to any famous person's story and you'll find that they'd failed time after time but constantly got back up and learned from their mistakes until they succeeded.
Don't throw yourself in the lions den with respect to approaching women. Use a step ladder approach. W What I mean by this is if you aren't approaching, then just make a point this week of engaging 10 women with "hello", or ask them what the time is and move on. Then next week ask them how their day is going, etc. Right now your sole focus should be approaching, not getting caught up in would have/could haves. Remember, you're screening HER to see if she's cool enough to hang with you so you can get to know her better. Do this and before long you'll have no problem approaching women. Ya you'll still feel so fear, but you will realize rejection is NOTHING and that fear won't immobilize you as you'd let it in the past.
God speed.
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