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Hey dude, I completely understood what you mean. I did this more times that I should.
But, from now, what I do is been myself more sexual. More confidence when I touch the girl, touching her as she was my girlfriend. And going for a kiss even when I think that I don't have gaming good enough. It's not about only the girl that is with you, but you do for the next one.
I lose two clear chances at last, and after that I didn't have another good opportunity like that. But I have been pushing myself with others g?irls to became more comfortable with this kind of situation. Even when you think that have no chance of happens, do it.
As you did with your approach anxiety you'll do the same with the kiss anxiety/fear.
Best luck next time mate.
I disagree. Why would you go for a kiss if you have no chance? The point is to create the chance. And then take it. But yes, don't be afraid of your sexuality.
@OP, you need to learn how to gauge her comfort levels as you escalate. That's it. I do it in 4 steps:
1. Hand on her leg as we sit next to each other. Don't just randomly put it there, do it after you just said something funny and are laughing together. Is she fine with that? good.
2. Throw your arm over her shoulder and slightly, just slightly pull her in. She not only will offer no resistance, but voluntarily come herself. If she liking you, that is.
3. You don't have to do it like this but once she's leaning into you, take one of her palms and examine it. Make fun of her for having man-hands while gauging for how relaxed she is. If it's crisp, you're not there yet. If it's relaxed, you're golden.
4. Tell her she has something on her face, and move your hand towards a spot on her cheek. Take her face in your hand while pretending to rub off that imaginary whatever-it-is and look her in the eyes while you do that. Does she look uncomfortable or anxious?
These 4 tests have never failed me. Ever. If these pass she wants you to kiss her, guaranteed. Like you've already been told, it simply is the next logical step.