| I can't really address you from the same standpoint, because as i have come to realize since i joint the community, i am a natural. Whish means, as long as i can remember, i have always had some degree of success with the opposite sex, what i thought and still think as a normal arrangement between man and women.
Even so, i guess i can make at least a small contribution to this thread, and it is quite simple.The reason why everyone can't excel when facing a new challenge, be it anything that requires skill, is mostly because of the following:
-nurturing strong core values, self imposed discipline through will power, resilience, and the most important, the ability to adapt. The last one is tricky, being the most important it requires more attention, more dedication, more energie. And for being able to evolve, to improve through adaptation, it means to reach the necessary paradigm shift so it can occur.
The reason i bring this one foreword it's because i have been reading a lot in this forum to keep pace with the rest of you, doing that, i have come across to a lot, and i mean a lot, of your post's.
And i realize that you are unable to judge what people tell you from a neutral not ego driven place. Also saw a lot of flaming back and forward, why?
Because even patient people like me get frustrated when in our good will we try to help at the expenses of our time, just to saw it hit a brick wall . Here, let me give you two examples featuring two windbags that don't fucking listen.
1) The gym dude that as fate put it, is always doing some retarded thing right next to me. For example, about four days ago when i was finishing my stretching exercises, i glanced to the side and saw the dude holding is body posture as someone that had just been run over by a truck, worst that that he was executing an exercise (dead lift) in a way that would challenge the common sense of a retarded non educated ten year old child. Then, doing my 'job' as a respectable somewhat altruist human being, i proceed to explain to him what he doing wrong and showed him to do it properly. The thing is, i wasn't surprised when i saw him today doing exactly the same thing, in the exact same way i explained him not to. And it wasn't the first time i gave him advice, advice he himself as ask me for for several occasions. This young man, will never, never achieve anything unless he radically shift his behavior towards what me and other people have been telling him for a long time. Simple because e can't recognize and absorb constructive criticism. He is not the only one, he falls in the huge statistical gap of people that pay the gym feeds but got almost nothing out of it. As i have discussed in today's lunch with my tall, natural blonde, almond eyes, chiseled PT (she is very inaccessible due her professional life, that's the reason i got her as my trainer). These people, next to all the things that i listened above, they can´t cut their learning curve, and thus, keep making the same mistakes over and over again...
2) The Facebook guy, well, it will take me an eternity describing everything that i perceive to be wrong whit is 'methods', so i am going to cut it short. Every time this guy meets a girl that displays some interest in him, he then proceeds to go online, find her account, and after given permission to access it, or not (open account), tracks all her close friends and relatives and creep them away with a flood of intimate, personal questions about her. Then after being scoul by the girl herself (there is always a snitch, lol), he cries his lungs out justifying his behavior as being right. The thing is, every now and then he finds a high tolerant, or desperate one, that forgives him. Then he does something even more retarded that eventually scares her away to. This guy is a twenty five year old virgin that suffers from the same affliction that the gym dude, he doesn't listen, he doesn't evolve. He asks whitout interruption asks for advice, hear it, and then give it back with some lame excuses. Leaving him always the same results for the same experience, as he designed.
What is common to this type of man a and women, is that they strongly believe that it is the rest of the world that needs changing and not themselves. That's why they will cling to every idea that resembles their distorted view, and immediately dismiss all the other ones (good or not) as an offense to their identity.
Everyone needs motivation, and a good part of motivation comes from the support of our peers, whether we like or not, we crave it, as social creatures we are, we need it. So dismissing the advice and encouragement that is given to us (for free) will only hurt us, because it will prevent us from improve.
Hope it rang a bell, any bell...
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