A relationship can totally destroy your pride, especially a break up. You can get so desperate for love that you don't care about anything else. However, pride in many ways is a good thing. It keeps you behaving as if you have standards and as if you are valuable. When you behave as if you are valuable people think you are valuable.

However, pride can also cause you to get overly protective, clingy, and overly affectionate because you feel embarassed because a girl might not like you. Its in important to take pride in not being clingy, overly protective, and pleasing. A relationship can really destroy you inside and take your pride and all standards. Seriously. When tested. These things can't even be options.

it all comes down to your confidence level. If you know you can get any girl you want or hold yourself in high self-esteem, you can get over these kinds of things rather quickly.

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Honestly, I don't know. Relationships change people. Guys and girls go thru a lot.

If you surrender your confidence to someone then you deserve whatever comes. Like I said, it is all about confidence. If you have it, then you can take those challenges head on and keep on surviving. Look at entrepreneurs. Many experience failure but few of them make it big. Only the strong survive.


If you rely on your relationship to give you confidence. Then you are doing it wrong.

Dean A.

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When people are in a relationship a lot times they are in love and are afraid of losing the person they love. This love and this fear can be so strong that you don't care about pride or dignity. I don't think it has much to do with self-confidence. You get people flying over the cuckoos nest doing all kinds of crazy things because they are in love.

PUA is like the complete opposite of why people get in relationships. You get in a relationship because you love someone and want to build a life with them. There's not much pride involved in loving someone. However, all the concern about status and value in the game makes it seem like its not about relationships.

This is not the art of loving someone. Its not about that. Because once you care too much you can't keep demonstrating high value. Once you love someone you don't care about pride, but gaming is all about pride.

Yes, when you fall in love, you might start feeling jealous when she's talking to other guys. You might feel like you need her to tell you she loves you all the time and affirm her love for you. Love, makes you a needy little bitch by default. HOWEVER, whether a relationship will be lasting, depends on one thing: Do you have the self-confidence, to not act upon these feelings?

Assertive is right, relationships is all about confidence. If I see some guy hitting on my girl, I get a spike of jealousy. I want to go over there and stop it right away. But I don't. I know that she wouldn't betray me for the world, and that I have nothing to fear. Hence, I don't act upon my emotions.

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Alea iacta est - The die has been cast

Honestly, I think there is no amount of self-confidence that would stop you from acting needy if you are in love with someone. The essence of being in love with someone is that most if not all your emotional energy is invested in that person. This is fictional, but even James Bond is changed by love in Casino Royal.

The heart of a player is cold. You can't be a player without dignity. When you care too much, when you're in love, you don't care about dignity. Love compromises your game, you beat yourself. You're too anxious, too sensitive, to protective, too sensitive, too appeasing, too clingy...

Which gets to the point I think pick up may be the exact opposite reason why many people get involved in pick up. A lot of people want love. And pick up will get you laid and have girls loving you, but can you actually fall in love?

... Are you seriously suggesting that the chemicals released by falling in love, will LITTERALY make you lose control of your body? Are you saying that you, as a conscious person, can only watch idly as the chemicals that are called love, move your legs towards the guy hitting up your girl, opens your mouth and says some needy bullcrap?

I am in love with my current GF. We've only been together for 2 months, so the level of chemicals are at their peak. I've found myself making mistakes every now and then, but seriously, I've never done anything against my will. Because I am confident that she feels the same way towards me, I never act out on jealousy.

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Alea iacta est - The die has been cast

I don't know what you feel the urge to do, but I think when you feel the urge to do something when you're in love its pretty damn hard to stop it.

Look man, people do things in relationships they really regret they ever did. And some are still doing things they wish they could stop doing. I'm not hear to judge anyone. I just don't see you gaming someone you're in love with, or for that matter even someone that you have one-itis for. If you care too much you start doing dumb shit.

The reason you might start doing dumb shit, is because you feel the need to do something, to prevent a scenario you've made up in your head because you're in love. Whenever this occurs, I recognize the feeling and act thereafter. I'm gonna stick to my earlier example of some guy hitting on her. I feel the need to stop this, because I automaticly think "What if he succeeds? I know how easily women can be manipulated.. I need to stop this." However, I also know that:
1. She is in love with me, and would never cheat. If she cheats, I'll end the relationship and she doesn't want that.
2. If I act out of neediness, this will kill her attraction towards me, and weaken our relationship. I don't want that, since I love her.

Perhaps I can't make the feeling go away, so I'll do something else. Something that sets my mind off of it. Even if it doesn't work, and I still feel insecure, I know why that helps me reason it out and keeps me on track.

Women are emotional beings, men are logical. We all know that. Use it to your advantage! Be logical in situations like this, and understand that the best thing you can do is to let her talk to other guys. What would you do if your GF started acting up for every woman you talked to?


On another note, we actually discussed this a while back. Where I said that "Naturally, since I love you, I might get jealous with every guy at a party hitting on you, but I trust you enough to not do anything about it." (She is a solid 9, so she has a LOT of guys constantly hitting on her. And yes, I know some of you might say that saying this is a mistake, but we have a really open and honest communication). Where she replied "Really? I can't see any reason why you should be jealous! If anything, I'm the one who's going to be!"

Bottom line - Acting out of jealousy is the quickest way to kill any relationship. If you can't stop yourself, find some exercises on self control.

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Alea iacta est - The die has been cast

The problem most men have is that they stop going out when having a GF. I've seen this in my friend group a couple of times. Then they break up and come to me for advice, while they actually were OK in their game.

It's basically the same with or without GF, but you just gotta watch out with kino and stuff. You can talk to women and look at them, but be aware that your GF is not jealous about it. If she is, then you have a rather clingy one

Just stay social, with or without GF. That way you keep your confidence.

Wallie

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