When do you think it is a good time to settle?



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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 3:22 am 
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I've been thinking about this...when is it time to chill out and settle? I've been meeting great girls but you know how the whole "monogamy thing" goes. I am not desperate to settle down any time soon but just wondering what you guys thought on the idea? I know some of the great PUAs of this forum have gotten married etc, so it isn't crazy talk I am speaking..

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 7:11 am 
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Depends what you mean by settling down. Marriage is one thing and an LTR is another.

I'll go for an LTR whenever I meet someone who I think is worthy of it. It doesn't happen often as my standards are high in that regard, but I don't ever force myself in an exclusive relationship nor do I force myself not to get in one.

As far as marriage goes.. that's different. I don't see myself married any time soon, but that doesn't have to do with monogamy as a main issue. There's just a lot of thing I want to do - outside of women - before I even entertain that idea.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 8:02 pm 
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You have to set your own rules bro.

I personally don't agree with the way marriage is setup in america, so I don't I'll ever get married, but I do see myself committing to a few women and no more for an extended period of time.

Why do you sleep with multiple women? Is it just for fun? Or is there a purpose? And then why would you get married? What would be the purpose?

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 8:43 pm 
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What other purpose can you have to sleep with multiple women than fun? Anything else seems like dark personality traits.

As far as settling down, I look at LTR as a trail period for marriage. I don't see a point in it unless the woman is of a standard I can keep around permanently. You can die any day. There is a certain immortality complex that comes with youth where we think we have a lot of time, and we'll look at stuff like this like some distant thing in the future.

"And I heard him say, nothings ever promised tomorrow today."

These are powerful words to me. As a magi I have certain understandings about things that happen after death, and this life we live now.

You only get one, and it's not promised you'll get anything more than what you've accomplished until today.

What sort of legacy do you want to leave behind?

To answer your question, for me I want to accomplish certain things before I start with that chapter. I'm having faith that I have enough time to do it, but I'm spending most of my time working towards those accomplishments so I can move on as quickly as possible.

I want a certain type of woman. I don't feel I am ready for her at this stage of my life though so I'm going to enjoy fun girls while I work on my other goals until I am ready.

A guy I know got married after he got locked up and his ltr sold her car to bond him out of jail. Only you know what qualities a woman needs for you to marry her.

The qualities of the woman I want to marry are a few levels above where I'm at right now and I want to be at or above her level when the time comes.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 8:47 pm 
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What other purpose can you have to sleep with multiple women than fun? Anything else seems like dark personality traits.
Tell that to people who have multiple wives or in polyamorous relationships. It doesn't mean that there is a dark purpose.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 8:54 pm 
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Yeah, but your examples are guys in relationships with multiple women. Not dicking them down and then kicking them to the curb.

If you're doing that for reasons other than having fun, it seems dark to me.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:12 pm 
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Yeah, but your examples are guys in relationships with multiple women. Not dicking them down and then kicking them to the curb.

If you're doing that for reasons other than having fun, it seems dark to me.
But you didn't mention the dicking them down and kicking them to the curb in your question...but they are still legitimate reasons for seeing multiple women and neither one would be considered a "dark purpose".

I'm sure that if you looked into it instead of just throwing out your current belief, you can find at least one more that didn't fit the dark purpose category.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:21 pm 
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Like what? Self gratification? Boosting up your own ego? Sex addiction? Misogyny? Masking loneliness temporarily by connecting physically with another human being? I could come up with a ton more of these.

Trying to think positively about this, all I see is having some fun - living life for the moment. Want to help me out here Jack?

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:23 pm 
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Like what? Self gratification? Boosting up your own ego? Sex addiction? Misogyny? Masking loneliness temporarily by connecting physically with another human being? I could come up with a ton more of these.

Trying to think positively about this, all I see is having some fun - living life for the moment. Want to help me out here Jack?
Google is a powerful tool

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:24 pm 
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Why would I research it if you have some answers on tap already?

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:28 pm 
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Out of fairness I googled "reasons to sleep with multiple women"

Interesting result here:

http://stylecaster.com/more-sex/

A ton of help and what not, and I also found this:

The Lingering Psychological Effects of Multiple Sex Partners

Well there you go.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:38 pm 
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Why would I research it if you have some answers on tap already?
The main reason is that you've made a statement without backing it up with a fact. I provided two reasons and then you modified the question to fit your point. At this point it appears that you would rather be right than admitting your statement was flawed.

Secondly, I'm on a website not using my real name. There are plenty of people out there that have actually spent time earning advanced degrees in the field of psychology and evolutionary psychology that have taken the time to answer this questions and you can verify who they are and their credentials.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:43 pm 
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Honestly Jack, I didn't modify my statement.

I jumped off the fact that this thread is about settling down vs playing the field.

I wouldn't consider multiple relationships or poly marriages as playing the field. I'm sorry I was not more clear and detailed in my stance before making the post which lead you down a path of misinterpretation.

And, yes there are many reasons I did not think of besides having fun for sleeping around. That link lists fun as #30. A lot of the reasons are women specific, but some can be applied to men.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 16, 2015 9:51 pm 
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I wouldn't consider multiple relationships or poly marriages as playing the field. I'm sorry I was not more clear and detailed in my stance before making the post which lead you down a path of misinterpretation.
LMAO
Quote:
What other purpose can you have to sleep with multiple women than fun?
How could I be the one to misinterpret that?

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