getting her to pay



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 Post subject: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Sun Mar 29, 2015 5:24 pm 
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I have been on two dates with this girl, both times ive paid and she's never even hinted at paying for anything. she doesn't even say "thank you". how do i approach this and why do some girls offer to pay and others don't?


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Sun Mar 29, 2015 5:39 pm 
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Just take her for a DVD at home

if she moans, just tell you are low on money or she can pay

She doesn't sound pleasant, I hate that. I am not cheap but I at least expect girls to offer

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Last edited by Dragula on Sun Mar 29, 2015 6:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Sun Mar 29, 2015 7:57 pm 
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Typically the person who invites the other out pays. If she isnt interested enough to plan something to see you, that's the issue. Short answer, if you fuck her well, she'll be trying to do nice things for you.


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:16 pm 
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Change up your date ideas. Do thing that are inexpensive. It's getting pretty nice out here, so there's always the park ;)

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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Mon Mar 30, 2015 10:04 am 
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Typically the person who invites the other out pays.
+1

However, you could suggest to her: say if you get lunch, she could get you both a shake/ice cream (or any other activity) at this new place you've been wanting to check out.

This is more of a token gesture but if she's interested she should reciprocate your generosity (or maybe she'll suggest something else) but in general keep it inexpensive for both parties.


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Mon Mar 30, 2015 9:46 pm 
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I have been on two dates with this girl, both times ive paid and she's never even hinted at paying for anything. she doesn't even say "thank you". how do i approach this and why do some girls offer to pay and others don't?

Get rid of her.. Or stop being a wimp and speak up.

What do you mean she doesn't even say thank you? You want to go out with a girl who isn't even appreciative of you taking her out?

Dude, I don't know about the rest of the guys but I'd say " How much do you got " when the bill comes for a woman with this kind of attitude? Did you enjoy yourself at least?

A woman not saying thank you after the date that i paid for is one of the biggest red flags to me personally. I'd call her out on that.. Sarcastically i'd say " Thank you for the good Eddie.. It was really good."

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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Mon Mar 30, 2015 10:33 pm 
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^ It could also be a cultural thing on the women's end, we are lacking a lot of details here.
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I'd call her out on that..
Meh, it's a lame feeling not being appreciated but I don't like to be hostile. If I felt that strongly about the situation I'd just "next" the chick. For me personally, I find it draining to be spiteful of others.
Not hostile bro. Just speaking up. I think you may of misunderstood the tone..Its only text of course.

Some women need to be trained I find.. I'll usually next them too, but I do it to make sure she treats the next guy with a little more grace. It ain't just about me.. I have brothers out there that deserve appreciation too. For each one.. teach one.

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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Mon Mar 30, 2015 11:52 pm 
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OP, Does she like you? Have you slept with her or at least kissed? Because if she doesnt like you then you gotta pay for the dates. I'm a big believer of you get what you deserve. And if you're being lame with this girl, I can't fault her for not offering to pay, because if you're not bringing anything besides money to the table, why should she reciprocate? And yes, she should bring more as well. But if she isn't and you still want to see her, then you gotta pay for that time. If a fat chick wants to go out with me, I'm not paying. So does she like you?


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 12:02 am 
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Go for the at home dates until you have sex with her. At the very least you'll have her isolated which means you can escalate toward sex the entire date.

After you get her in bed a couple times, the power shifts to you, assuming you're taking care of business.

Once I'm at that stage with a girl I have no problem setting up an vague date "hey I was thinking drinks and darts Saturday", let her agree then be like "cool, well it's your turn to take me me out so hOw does xyz place sounds"

I do this all the time and works like a charm.


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 12:12 am 
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Like I normally say I am new but I believe in at least creating the illusion that chivalry is still alive and then insinuating the need for her to keep it alive by saying something along the lines of "I would look to be treated sometime too."


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 12:37 am 
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I've always considered it to be perfectly fair to pay for a date, when she's spent 2 hours getting ready for it, while I've spent 15 minutes. If she's a tomboy or something, yeah, maybe she should pay. If she's looking good, I can't complain about picking up $10-15. And neither should you, if you value your time. How much time you spend hanging out with this/other chicks to get to this point?

There are plenty of reasons to dump an ungrateful chick, but a few bucks on a date is not one of them. If you're that poor, then just take her on free dates. Parks, home movies, etc.

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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 12:46 am 
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I agree. Good women are tough to come by and while I do not believe in paying for everything I do believe in making her feel that she was worth it. Not necessarily with money but definitely through actions if nothing else. At some point you have to let your guard down.


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 12:47 am 
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Yes I would agree that 10-15 bucks is nothing, but I can't remember the last time I spent that little on a date.

From what OP was describing though it sounded a bit more like going out out, I'm assuming bars and drinks or something similar which obviously adds up fast. Though if that were the case I'd suggest a few drinks at your place before heading out.


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 1:03 am 
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That is a genius idea because then you can establish a more comfortable connection with just the two of you but really it depends on her and what you are willing to put up with. It sounds like you really like her though. Even if only for the moment.


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 Post subject: Re: getting her to pay
PostPosted: Tue Mar 31, 2015 1:41 am 
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Seriously, I've been doing first date drinks, which can get expensive, then second date is dinner and sex at my place. I'll do that a couple times if I can get away with it, and if you're giving it to her like you should it shouldn't be hard. Then we'll start going out and doing datye shit. First one or two of those I'll pay, then the next one I'll tell her she's taking me out. Then after that hopefully she gets what you're saying, if not you remind her again it's her turn.

Initially chicks just automatically assume they're not paying for anything so to spring it on them when you're out and its time to pay generally doesn't work well. But if you've gotten her to take you out a time or two she's a conditioned that she has some responsibility in your activities so she should have her wallet. At that point, if the bill is small, you just turn to her and say "split this one"? Of course in that situation be prepared to pay the whole thing if she pulls a chick move.


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