| So yesterday I called my oneitis-girl, which I stopped hanging out with approximately 1,5 month ago because my feelings for her were too strong, and she had to tell me she didn't feel any sexual connection with me, she only saw me as a friend, so my plan was to tell her I needed pause, but actually drop all contact with her like forever, remove her from facebook, etc, in order to get over her.
However, she is moving to another city in only a few days, and I wanted to see her before she moved, so I called her and told her it would be nice to see her, so today we hanged out for 2 hours, and I used all the new things I learned, and we had so much fun together, and my feelings for her were actually not overpowering me like they have used to, so I was taking much more initiative, being proactive, taking charge in creating a lot of fun for us, in stead of waiting for her permission to do things. I also focused on interrupting her when she was getting lost telling about boring stuff from her own life, and brought our mutual attention more to something that was shared in the moment between us, creating more spark and eye-contact, instead of she spacing out into something boring shit and loosing eye-contact with me. I also told her much less about my own pseudo-therapeutic process with life, etc, and at one point she actually said "so what else is going on in your life? you seem so secretive!" She was annoyed and intrigued at the same time, and it made her invest more in me, asking me much more questions about my own life, and referring to stories of value that I had told before, because it wasn't for granted that these things were given to her freely and in too large doses. I also didn't speak anything about me wanting to be in a relationship with her, or any of that stupid fucking crap that I have killed the romantic vibe with so many times before.
So when we said goodbye, I lifted her inside again, so we could have a better position to give each other a long and good hug, instead of me leaning out of the door to hug her, and then the most beautiful thing happened. She totally melted into my arms like I have never experienced, and she was breathing really deeply and heavily, making sounds that almost sounded mildly sexual. So I stopped hugging her, looked her deeply into the eyes, and she smiled and laughed, so I rubbed my nose against her nose, and she rubbed back, and then I dived in to kiss her, and she kissed me back, and laughed mildly, so I kissed her once more, and told her it was so good to see her again, and she left smiling and with great sparkle in her eyes. Before she has always given very insecure and sort of rushed vibes when she has left, but this time, after our kissing, she seemed much more relaxed about keeping eye-contact much longer.
I had no idea these PUA things would have had such a great effect!
Especially reading Corey Waynes book has helped so much.
But I have also gotten very many extremly good replies on my question on this forum.
After all this tension and build-up that has been between us for 6 months now, I feel pretty confident that I don't need to do anything at all anymore. When I have given her all this crap for so long, and still she is capable of melting into my arms that like she did today, I don't need any confirmation that she really likes me. Also, I feel satisfied because now I can look back at it no matter what happens and know in my heart that we had something going on, and that I wasn't just some stupid friendzoned guy falling in love with someone way out of my league that only used me as a therapist and strait gay male friend. We have something real going on.
I guess we're going to continue to see each other now, and probably things will escalate on their own, and I'm not really so sure I want to be in a relationship with her anymore. Perhaps I would, but it is not so important, what is way more important is understanding all the different aspects and schools and practices of PUA, so that I can become someone who has cracked the code when it comes to women, and life, and masculinity.
Any thoughts, recommendations or motivational comments on this latest development?
This really rocks! Thank you so much, guys!!!!!
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