Well guys, i made some observations about a girl i had been gameing after talking to Jsmooth. I realized 2 negative social traits about her that i initially couldnt put my finger on but felt. I felt an incongruency in her personality but was atributing it in the wrong areas.

These 2 traits are a clear sign that your wasteing your time with someone, be it friend, g/f-b/f, aquantence,etc. I looking back should have easily noticed these 2 traits after our first time out together (most likely what would normally be 2nd day interaction or maybe a few hours into meeting them)

-Acts different when alone with you and when they are around others.

This may sound straight foreward, but sometimes its not. What i mean is someone who not only speaks a certain way, but also body language, tonality, acceptance of others, world views.

If when your with them they are agreeable with your veiws, cheerful, happy, intelligent, nice...and willing to kino (obviously opposite sex, or same sex if thats your thing), and then not so much when they are around you and other people, this is a red flag.

-Seems social, but doesnt get along with anyone

This is less obvious. For instance if they seem to have alot of friends, know everyone they live around, and come accross as being outgoing and able to make friends...but then do nothing but talk about how they dont like x,y,and z people and a, b, and c people dont like them or have a problem with them....this is a red flag too.

A socially outgoing person wouldnt align with people they dont like, or with people that dont like them...unless they feed off drama and also share the trait above. All smiles when around one person and then talking behind thier backs when they leave.


So there you have it, if you notice either of these traits in a target or a friend...my advice is to bail. At some point you will realize that this personality is not a trust worthy person.

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-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Those types of people are metaphorical social sinkholes. You get involved with them and all you've got in your future is a lot of complaining and drama.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Great post ka. Thinking about it now this describes some of the girls i've been dating and they have all turned out to be wrong-uns.
If i keep this in mind it might stop me from getting stung in the future.

Nice Post KA.

I recognize this traits in my most recent ex girlfriend.

Wow. While reading this, I came to realize that my best friend is like this. When its just us 2 chillin, hes really cool. But then when he gets around other people, he becomes an asshole. He dosent become an asshole all the time, it just depends on who were hanging out with. He seems to try to poke fun at me, then when I use an AMOG destroyer he threatens to beat my ass (which he cant. I can beat the shit out of him. Ive done it before).

I think its time for me to bail on him

I know what you're saying but I actually don't agree with the way you worded this. Some people are shy, some girls are really shy, and they act differently around others because they are simply not comfortable around people they don't know.

PUA's have the skill of socializing and making their targets comfortable within the first few hours, while generally speaking the average person needs days or weeks to get comfortable with strangers.

But with respect to your other point, where they seem to be friends with people and then talk badly about them behind their back, I completely agree with that. In fact I can't stand to be around people who badmouth their friends behind their backs. The exception is when girls do it to their friends I've sarged, because I understand they are trying to raise their own value in my eyes. If it continues after comfort, I leave.

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I agree roads, but this one girl i was with was really shy around strangers, when she had'nt had a drink, but she still turned out to be a crazy bitch, i knew this from the off, but she seemed so nice, she did both what ka described, so i believe in what he said.

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To effectively communicate, we must realise that we are all different in the way we percieve the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.

Take notice to the traits i listed that change, especially acceptance and world veiws...regardless of how outgoing you are or if you are shy or not...these things do NOT change. The first three traits i listed all have to do with communication and thus could change dependant on the persons comfort level.

However all these communicative type traits should adjust over time as they grow more comfortable around people, if they do not this is yet another red flag.

As far as those things go however, if a girl is willing to hug you, hold your hand, or heavy kino with you but not around others...she has something to hide.

If someone agrees with you about an intellegent topic but around others sides with them...not a good sign.

There is ALWAYS room for small adjustments in personality...we end up feeling out people on a micro level and make small adjustments to them, and them to us. However when these changes are drastic it should throw up a read flag that the person is not trust worthy.

BTW, im glad to see this thread alive...took a while for it to catch on. Thanks for taking the time to read it. Im glad it has caused some of you to look at the people in your lives, and decide whether or not they belong in your life.

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-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Ok, yeh i agree i know plenty of people like this, as im sure we all do.
Let me ask this, does this trait really matter if all your after is to f-close and leave it at that?

Well this post wasnt really directed only at targets...

My answer would be no, and yes.

You will have to cut threw all the persons bullshit to get the f-close. If you can deal with that and dont mind constantly calibrating to adjust your game based on who else is around, then no.

Beleive me tho...most of us dont have the pateience to deal with bullshit that deep. I personally would rather f-close someone else without dealing with the bs.

I noticed these traits in dealing with a target who i could pretty easily say is the hottest girl ive ever interacted with. After i noticed these things about her im completely turned off. Sure she is still physically attractive and i wouldnt mind closeing her...but its not worth the trouble.

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-Ka-
"Be the same, only better."

Ka that's generally true but I've known people that were very assertive with their views once I got to know them, but were generally very passive and would agree with just about anything before they got to know me. After they are comfortable with me, I then notice that they are the same way with others. The problem is their personality is such that they just don't want to provoke an argument with a stranger, regardless of the issue.

So I think the red flag should go up immediately if it's the other way around, where they agree with you on everything in private, and then start AMOGing and disrespecting you in front of people you meet. I can't stand those types of people, because they are trying to raise their value through destroying that of their friends, because it's not a good method of doing it and they lower their own values in the process. Hey, I don't have a problem against people trying to look good, I have a problem with incompetency. These are like walking social sinkholes like you mentioned, and should be avoided.

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