Been dating this HB9 I work with for 8 months. We shag all the time and she has tried to give the "What are we" talk, wants sex, says she wants me to stay at her house, compliments me, ect all the time. We occasionally bring up opposite sex workers at our job that we hang out with (she does this to try to make me jealous and I don't react, plus I hit her with her own medicine and she hears rumors about girls that like me)

ANYWAY, she said to me recently (a day we shagged like 4 times) that she is going to go for a run with a friend of ours from work. He is a good looking guy and had tried to date her before me, but not only did she used to cancel plans with him to hang with me, but he turned her off by texting her all the time back then. He even drives by her house to see if I'm there, and she is slightly creeped. She has guy friends but is not a skank (only one bf in the past and it was long term and we are young) who she has exercised with before who were AFC to the max. The thing is, she told me this kid was going to run with her, then he flaked on her and blah blah blah.

I ignore the situation like I should, but do you think there is any attraction there for her if he used to text her too much, she is banging me (and isn't a skank), she used to flake on him for me, and she has called him a little boy in the past? I guess she considers him a friend like she does one of her gay guy friends and a few AFC fellas. But I can't help but feel I shouldn't react to this.

Edit: She has also been trying to get me to come with her to parties to show we are together I feel

its normal to be reactive, idk if you see other girls beside her, but if she find out that she is a plan B, she will start to considering you as a plan B too because that the only logical way for her to maintain that relationship without being jealous.

I once had a girl who know im seeing other girls that make hickies on me every time we laid. Dont stay too long with the same woman unless you are going to change the level of the relationship because eventually she will find someone else if you dont take it.
People who doesnt know about the game have attraction too, you are not a special piece of snow flake. Keep that in mind and you will be fine.

The rest its up to you.

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So what is the goal here?

Are you happy or annoyed that she's asking you "what are we?"

It sounds like you want to keep everything casual, yet you are getting jealous about some douche she is going to go jogging with.

First of all, if shes going jogging with an AFC douche who she is annoyed with in the first place, its for only one reason: to fuck with you.

Its a power move to get you to commit. Make your decision now, or things will get messy.
This paragraph makes you sound like a guy that gambled one too many times, and now the tides are turning. Ask yourself what you want out of this deal because it seems pretty black and white to me. If you want her, she's there for the taking. If you keep trying to play her emotions, things will get messy and you will lose her.

She knows I hang with an ex a bit but aren't physical but I am clearing those things up to start something with her. I know this isn't fair and I'm changing that now

Can I bring up the relationship status tho? How do i get her to re initiate that what are we conversation

Stop being a puss and say "Hey, I want to be with you."

You'll know immediately what she wants.

There's really no need for her to wait to initiate the "what are we" conversation. It's okay for guys to start it, especially if you really want something serious or you want your relationship to go a notch higher.

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if she has been pushing for the relationship for some time now, you can play with the thought of getting into a relationship with her. It is clear as day when two people like each other. You can actually start acting like her boyfriend is a relationship is what you want. She will progressively fall into the frame and boom. You guys are a couple. Either of you can make it official.


For now, you have no right to be jealous or even care about what she tries to do to you. You guys are not in a relationship so she doesn't owe you shit.


Mr. A

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