This.

But more.

They may have sensed you came to the bar alone, and they may have used as one factor to conclude that you're "awkward as fuck," but seems to me that you were just generally giving off an awkward vibe. The fact that you went to the bar alone is probably irrelevant.

My guess is that some of these guys just felt like you were awkward for some reason or another but couldn't really pinpoint why they felt that way, so of course they would try to backward-rationalize it with reasons their brains might be able to understand, so they reached for the coming-to-bars-in-groups-being-normal thing.

You might have some work to do in the area of giving off a smooth and naturally social vibe.

Oh, and as for how I would respond to any shit tests and AMOG insults:
Dude: "You're awkward as fuck"
Chief: "OK" (completely unaffected, then stop paying attention to him, going back to positive frame and giving my attention to someone else)

...but I wouldn't have been in that situation in the first place because I would have probably been whispering in some girl's ear with my hand on her lap while she's giggling and turning red instead of talking to 8 dudes...

Firstly, everyone saying to come back with a retort won't really tend to make many friends in this situation. The excuses are well, excuses so the only option is to just to re-frame it all to the positive or just flat out ignore it.

I agree with Chief though, if they were calling you out for being awkward its probably because you were acting awkward. Every time I go out I normally end up with a group of people I didn't know when I started the night. Maybe 1 or 2 friends I came with will also be in the group, maybe all the people I came with are in a group with few randomers - the point is, going out to a bar or club should be social. If I see someone standing around on their own (with the exception of if they are waiting at a busy bar / outside a toilet) it will normally seem awkward - if they are interacting with people I will probably think they are fairly cool (assuming the group body language isn't screaming FUCK OFF).

Ultimately, you should have left. It should even phase you that they said anything.

"Why are you out lone?"
"because I enjoy it *change subject*"

It is a shit test, to test your frame. They couldn't understand why someone would go out alone because non of them would have the balls to do it, so they tested to see if you REALLY were the confident or just weird. By accepting THEIR frame, you came across as weird. If you just moved on and either left them or started chilling with someone else, they would have just accepted it.

Haha good laugh, nothing wrong with going solo, i've felt the most freedom when its a lone wolf deal. Having AFC friends who make a night of being lined spectators to every girl you flirt with gets mighty old fast.

That being said there's flip-sides to this. Lone sarging shows confidence, independence etc, while also being open to interpretation as being a loner, poor social proof etc. Going out solo is best suited to the clubs/bars in which you are highly unlikely to run into clusters you know.

Personally I would have stayed and jerked him off, its obvious he was in your grill from the moment he piped up, would have been worth it just for the troll value.
"Too bad boys, i'll play this one as I please."

Could be extra snide and say you don't need a bunch of powerpuff girls like his friends to roll with. (Depends on your frame control, and just how aggressive they were.)
"I roll how I want sweetheart. Don't fault me because you don't have the confidence."

Take the piss. This was also your cue to start gaming the girls, make it known, and start #winning. If success came, lead a girl outside by the hand, and bid him farewell with your closing line. But that's just me.

-SilverTonguedFox

Thanks chief. I've been working on the smooth social vibe for about 15 years and haven't made much headway. I've almost just brushed my hands off and decided "This is something your're either born with or you were in the right environment early on where the right mindset and behaviors got ingrained. I've read so many studies about environmental impact in growing up, and this shit is unreal. You see some of this shit and figure the way you're brought up, etc. makes like 99% of the who they are.

Some fucked up shit was going on my first 22 of so years of my life so to do all this unwiring at 31 now seems damn near impossible. And this is coming from a guy who has the balls to roll into a place by himself when every friend he txts is too chicken shit to come out, so it's not like I ain't trying.

And the non-reactiveness; I'm working on that too. Some nights I do better than others. If anything; it's like smiling; probably one of the easiest things to say do, but the hardest *to* do.

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Hey Madals, could you clarify some of your response? I thought there might've been some typos in there and wasn't sure.

What about sitting at a bar by yourself? Playing with your phone, looking at screens, maybe opening girls as they come up. Personally I would've NEVER been standing around by myself, and I wasn't that night. If the venue doesn't support walking up to ppl or all of the groups I feel like approaching blow me off, I move on.

What's this a out "I ultimately should have left"? Did you mean *should not have*?

You said it "should even phase me that they were . . . ". Did you mean * shouldn't have*?

- I only ask because the follow-up you then tell me to use is from a guy who's stuck around.

I just wanted to know if you don't mind.

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Most of the replies on here have it way off. Trying to one up the guy with a clever retort is going to make you enemies, not friends, or even worse, get you in a fight. In this game, everyone is your friend -- or you must make them that way. Other men are not an obstacle to gaining women, they are an asset. Let me explain.

We know that one of the characteristics of an alpha male is being a leader. One of the ways we show this in a social environment like a club or bar is demonstrating that we have lots of friends, thus revealing that we are a person that others want to associate with. If you act like an asshole to dudes or take things personally, you show insecurity and subconsciously demonstrate to everyone around you that you are insecure and base your own value on the others perception of you. If you have lots of friends, men and women, people will want to align with you because you have demonstrated preselection. If the men like you, they will hand their female friends to you on a silver platter. I crashed a wedding party this weekend by chatting up the dude who was hosting the after party, and he invited me into their private party section and introduced me to all his female friends. As weird as it may sound, you must game men in the same way you game women. A person have high value has no enemies.

I disagree. It is impossible to be everyone's friend without compromising your personality. So somebody is downright rude to you, your response is to make friends with him? Weak beta behaviour.
Alphas don't appease people to make friends. Alphas say and do whatever the fuck they want. And they certainly don't back down to assholes.
You are not reflecting the situation accurately. The situation is the other guy was a rude asshole FIRST, you as the alpha then respond to his rudeness. You are reporting this incident as if the OP just walked into a bar being an asshole. OP was being friendly and some asshole was really rude to him.

I think what he's getting at is that a true leader is magnanimous and never lets himself get pulled into shit where he'd ever be asking "You wanna take this outside?"

I think there's a difference between that and being a pussy/beta/pushover.

Think about a business or political leader you really look up to who can never be caught talking shit about anyone - or any leader really. People sure as hell gravitate towards these people.

So in that sense he's right I think.

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I'm hearing a lot of talk about the way my response would be and many others would start up a fight.

You're absolutely right. It is very possible.

Why is fighting deemed bad on a forum where people strive to be an alpha male? Fact is, men with higher testosterone take less shit while men with lower testosterone take more. If you've been in a fight and won, you will feel like the king of the world. Your testosterone is spiked. You are alpha as fuck.

A bouncer buddy of mine tells me that bitches flock to him every time a drunk tries to start shit with him and he takes him down. We're told that women like alpha males so this makes sense.

Another bouncer buddy of mine (cousin) says everytime he bounces someone out of the club (physically) women come up to him and say "Omg that was so hot".

If you want to be an alpha male, you better be ready to fight.

I never understood this "Ok" response that Chief speaks of. I have never seen it done by a man who gets women. At a night club or wherever. The guy with girls never takes shit from anyone.

If anyone has a video of this "Ok", non reactive, response please post.

Check out this quote from the 50th Law.
Ignoring the situation (just saying "ok"...) makes you look guilty. E.g., he calls you awkward as fuck, you say ok, then you probably are awkward as fuck. Even my way of attacking back isn't the right way. My comebacks would be deemed as defensive. The best way is to channel it into a positive direction... which I'm having difficulty trying b/c I'm a comeback type of guy. But I'll try it...

Asshole: You're awkward as fuck man.
FlexBrah: Ahh a man that speaks his mind... You're a rare breed.
Asshole: Thanks?/What is that suppose to mean?
FlexBrah: You're a ballsy guy so you can do the job. See the 2 girls behind me, I talk to the one in red and you get the one in black. *while fixing his collar* Lead the way, champ. *pat on back*
Asshole: (Either he leads the way or he makes some excuse. If he starts making excuses "uhh well I have a" just walk towards the girls or somewhere so he's talking to your back and he's the awkward one)

^^That's what I would picture in my head. I generally do slick comebacks b/c it avoids looking like you are trying to hard to create positive energy/look like you're unaffected... but I like my skit.

Maybe I'll start trying this "positive" method out.

It's amazing the things you can learn when you write it out.

you *shouldn't* have left, and you shouldn't have been phased.

Sorry for the typo, was tying it out REALLY late my time

what happened to the law of least effort. You could just use your body language to seem uninterested in the conversation. Just shrug it off and move on to the next topic.

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pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

Instead of shrugging it off, arguing or fighting about it, the other option could just be to remain straight-faced and say absolutely nothing. Pretend you didn't hear.

This is a really good post. I also personally think simply saying "ok" is backing out of a conflict, and one who backs out of a conflict looks and probably IS weak. I guess Chief may be assuming that by saying "ok," the 8 idiots divert their attention to something else as you continue to give your attention to someone else. But who's to say they won't start cracking jokes on your behalf for the next 10 minutes as you try to socialize with someone else? Wouldn't it be difficult to engage in a full conversation with someone else as your ears pick up derogatory comments in the background? You would need a crazy solid frame for it to not affect your game. But even then, wouldn't women see this as DLV, who see you getting made fun of by a bunch of douche bags?

I would personally choose to fight back and stand up for myself, even if I have an average build and may possibly get my ass kicked. Real heroes will fight until their last breath. We've seen this time and time again in Hollywood movies. We don't tell ourselves "wow that guy was a real idiot to take on all those guys inciting him." We tell ourselves "wow that guy was pretty courageous to take on a tough fight."

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Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

I wrote up a fight back post but I agree with both Chief and madal, honestly the only way you can grant them power over you is by fighting back... Not giving any value to their words makes them powerless over you.

It not just saying ok, it's literally not giving a fuck what they have to say, it's not caring for a word they say because their opinion of you is meaningless, fighting back means you care about what they think, giving them the power because you are seeking their validation.

Why on earth do you give a fuck if those 8 people are saying things about you? Why does their opinion or jokes hurt you? Some dumb asses that are strangers effect how you feel about yourself? Why? Seriously what do you think is more powerful - you fighting back their words or thoughts about you or you not even acknowledging their statement because it means that little to you?

The most confident thing to do is dismiss it, the strongest thing to do dismiss it, anyone with high self-esteem wouldn't be hurt or effected by a strangers thoughts on them.... Note: High Self-Esteem is read as high value.

Peace and Love,

Vic

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