Hey all,

So, I have been reading tons of PUA material these past few months and have been more socially active in order to train my skills.

While I have improved my inner game and manage to spark attraction in the beginning, I keep screwing up in the end. The discussion becomes boring, there are dreaded silences, I stick to the safe topics, I try to look cool, I become too agreeable, etc.

Personally, I hate this phase of seduction because once I know the person better, I open up and become the funniest guy ever (according to my friends). I have so much pressure on the first dates that I mess things up and then the girl never gives me a chance to show her my true personality

The worst thing is that I keep making the same mistakes as before getting into PUA:
*almost no kino
*no sexual talk/innuendo
*I am funny but not fun, thus I get friendzoned

The truth is that I feel extremely uncomfortable talking about sex (or even acting sexually) with strangers. With my ex, I was extremely naughty and playful. But with girls on a 1st, 2nd, even 3rd date, I am always too hesitant and do not know how to start flirting (for some reason, it doesn't feel right because the girl is a stranger to me).

After many years, I finally managed to admit that if I don't flirt, things will never move on 99% of the time...
However, I still lack the reflexes. When I was dating a HB back in December, it was raining one day and I offered to take her under my umbrella. She immediately grabbed my arm and squeezed herself against me. I was too innocent to realize she was ready to be kissed (needless to say nothing ever happened between us). I have also realised that my single female friends do not view me a sexual thing/threat. It annoys me to no end when they start ranting on the lack of decent males ("hellllloooooo, I am in front of you and I am a free guy!!!!" grrr, I hate that)

However, even after reading a lot, I still fail to understand how sexual escalation actually works. I need more concrete examples with real-life situations. I also need some examples of fun topics to discuss. Also, what type of sexual things can you talk about with a girl you have just met (first dates)?

For example, when is it the right time to touch her. It's so fucking complicated because you pass as a loser if you do it wrong...
Also, I fail to understand how much I should escalate with the girls I am dating with (I am looking for a relationship and not a ONS, so I don't want to jump to sex from the start - I want a decent girl, not a slut). How far can one go on the first date?


This is a major issue for me and I am kinda stuck. Thanks in advance for any useful tips.
Cheers!

I could type it out but this would explain it better

http://www.scribd.com/doc/16768511/Vin- ... ion-Ladder

Thanks, but I have already read.

What I am more looking for are real-life situations where you escalated and how you did it.
Moreover, sexual escalation can also be verbal. What kind of fun sexy stories/jokes do you tell girls?

Read 60 years of challenge. It will help you with escalation. You want to risk being called a perv early on in the night or your first interactions. Once you do, then you no longer have a fear of escalating.

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this ... his%20game

She WILL let you know (behavioral and/or verbally) when you're crossing a line.

The key here is NOT to get pouty and reactive in any way ("are you not attracted to me?"), but rather use the oportunity to build further comfort to overcome any resistance. As 60yearsofchallenged says, expect to be 'rejected' the first time you try and escalate, that way you wont act disapointed. Don't worry, chances are she's just testing your response more than anything, and also does not want to come off as easy (let's face it, who does unless you're a prostitute.).

If you're naturally funny, girls will be touching you first. This will usually be a play punch to your arm or a high five. When a girl touches you first, you're now in the courtship stage of the f-close. Either you pass the f-close stage or you fail. From stage 1 to stage 3, girls will initiate the courtship. Stage 3 is all about touching. Girls will touch you first. If they're not touching you first, work on your grooming and testosterone showmanship.

• When a girl touches you and you don't touch her back = Friendzone
  
  When a girl touches you and you touch her back in the same manner (mirroring) = Friendzone
  
  When a girl touches you and you touch her hair = Sexual escalation

You also have no-touch, no-talk escalation techniques like Eyefucking, monster cocking (as opposed to peacocking) and butt showmanship.

So many guys are exercising their biceps and chest and yet the majority of women (around 40%) are turned on with good, masculine butts. If you want your exercise to be high pay off, exercise your butt and do some high intensity interval training focused on cardio. Girls will ogle your butt but most of them will subtly check out your butt once and too often. When you notice girls checking out your butt, flex your butt muscles and you'll see some faces redden.

I'm a firm believer that accessories shouldn't make your face or head look weird. Choose accessories that bring attention to your crotch area. Girl's can't help but look in your crotch area most especially when you have shiny, metallic accessories near your cock. When girls look at your crotch for more than 3 seconds or they look at it more than 3 times, then that's your signal to escalate on your sexual innuendos.

You can say some things like, "I feel so tired every day. My cock is too heavy. It can be a real pain." But only say this when you catch a girl looking intently at your crotch area.

That's all for now. Checkout my thread at the PUA Lounge for more field tested techniques with scientific grounding.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html

This. It's pretty much about ballsing up, feeling that fear then just grabbing that girls hand anyway. Get closer make laser eye contact, touch her!


google esp model of escalation its great.

_________________
"Once you learn to feel the fear and do it anyway, the outcomes will come."- 60yoc

My journal of adventures and escalation: time-to-go-for-the-kills-escalation-blo ... highlight=

I'm working on a field report that covers physical escalation in detail. IM me if you want to read it unedited.

For what to say, here is one idea. Talk about this clueless AFC that once offered a hotty to come under his umbrella, which she did and pressed up to him, but he was completely clueless and missed a golden opportunity.

Seriously, these forums are full of conversation material. Most of the posts can be used to show your understanding of relationship dynamics. You can assume the role of the person who knows and girls will love it. Tell it as if it were a friend that it happened to. When you want to get physical use examples where a guy is clueless physically (like the umbrella, but act it out with a girl while you tell it, her playing the role of said hotty, which also gives a subtle neg, where she'll wonder if the girl was hotter than her).