Ya I guess I am back again to get advice from this forum because what better forum is there.

Anyways, when I first came here I was insecure about being perceived as attractive by women due to my race/ethnicity (Indian). I was a virgin and everything. Then about years later I got some lays under my belt and it seemed like things were going alright. Now for a while I thought my hang up about thinking about my ethnicity was gone. Come December 2012, I passed up a chance to go to Sweden because I thought my ethnicity would impact my chances of getting laid there.

Once I completely overcome this inner game hurdle, I will probably leave PUA forums in general and just be on with my life.

I have so many scenarios imagined in my head where a woman passes me up for a Black guy or White guy because of stereotypes. Sometimes I constantly think about why there aren't many Brown guys (Indian, Middle Eastern, Brown Latinos) out there dating White women in higher numbers as opposed to Black guys (in my area interracial relationships aren't that common at all). I get this feeling in my head that the whole world is trying to stop me from scoring with an attractive White woman because I am Indian but is rooting for the Black guy or White guy whenever they go for an attractive Blonde girl.

I mean for months I never thought about this but for the past 3 weeks it has been bothering me more and more.

This whole conception over the internet about being Indian and not being able to score with good looking women of other races (especially white) has put some unhealthy chip on my shoulder, at times made me bitter, and has made me almost hate certain countries (UK, Canada) because I think that everyone there has some sort of an agenda in trying to stop a guy that looks Indian from scoring.

Is a psychiatrist going to be able to help?

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I just come on here these days to give advice and read interesting threads. Gone are the days when I came to seek advice and validation.

Psychiatrist are generally inclined to prescribe pills. You want to talk, try a psychologist instead. You want my advice: learn to deal with rejection, and turn your perceived weakness into your strength.

Your perspective on the issue focuses on your race, but I do not think that is the problem. I think you are in essence right about the appeal of different races, because I have also noticed that many people state they do not want to have sex outside their race. That being said, there are many people who do not want to have sex with you regardless of your race. Being rejected, for whatever reason, feels like crap. But in your life and mine, we will be rejected by and for many things: jobs, education, loans, and women, just to name a few. Rejection is a part of life, and so you must learn to deal with rejection or spend life crying in the corner.

So a life without rejection does not exist, but does that mean the reasons for rejection are not important at all? I guess that isn't completely true either. I can imagine being rejected for a job because of your race hurts more than because of a lack of skills. However, many people have turned their racial (or other) disadvantage into their forte. People who succeed in doing this are actually ahead of the curb. Many of them have gone on to become successful businessmen, scientists, or political leaders. Isn't Gandhi, for example, one of the greatest heroes of our time? Indeed, you are afraid to be rejected by women because of your race, but Indians wrote the most influential book on sex in the history of mankind. That could be a source of strength right there. In the end, you are Indian, and you will be Indian for the rest of your life. It is a part of your identity, your self. And knowing your self shouldn't drag you down, it should lift you up.

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One of the most useful things you will ever learn about body language.

Paramount, I am just a white rAFC so I cannot certainly speak out of my vast experience.
But if i can offer a bit of an dvice, I completely agree with Timo: Though your thinking does appear a bit obsessive, it does not seem to me you need to run to a psychiatrist as yet, if anything a psychologist.
You are aware of your thought processes and that is a great start. Another great guy once taught that mindfulness and awareness are key factors for getting enlightened, and guess what, he was Indian as well.
Being Indian may be a factor, among many, that makes you less attractive to some and MORE attractive to others.
I am either attracted to a woman or I am not, independently from her race.
Or, put it in other words, her race or skin color surely contributes to the overall picture that in the end makes me be attracted to her or not, but it is never, for me at least, in itself a dealbreaker.
Statistically I tend to be more attracted by white, latinas, indian, asians and black womenin that order, but I'll take a charming girl over a dull one anytime, regardless of their race.
Keep watching your thoughts and if they really become obsessive, intrusive or paralizing (rather than legitimate concerns, or plain vanilla fear of rejection) there may be a role for a psychiatrist, otherwise sarge happily and if you know for a fact that a given girl rejected you solely because of your race, I think you are better off without her aniway.

My two rupies.

Ankh

Hate the UK? We have a massive Indian population, surely it would be less of an issue than other places? I know Indian guys that are players, they don't seem to have a problem. It's not going to be an advantage to you but the whole point of game is picking up chicks without relying on looks. Dress well and perhaps westernize your accent, I can't see you getting treated much differently to anyone else. Well done on confronting your issue though, all these sub-conscious things are a bitch to deal with.

I don't have an Indian accent

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I just come on here these days to give advice and read interesting threads. Gone are the days when I came to seek advice and validation.

plus I consider myself to be an american but then people ask for ethnicity (they guess arabic or middle eastern)

I tell them I am Indian and that is where my worries come in

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I just come on here these days to give advice and read interesting threads. Gone are the days when I came to seek advice and validation.

Buy the book psycho cybernetics...

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Where to hunt for white women that like Indian guys:

coffee shops

bookclubs

meetup or even a facebook group (find some ethnic or Indian club on there)

anything new age/hippy, maybe some new age college club

stop catering yourself to women as a quickiemart owner or some perverted Indian motel owner, and start capitalizing on the exotic aspect of your culture. And grow a goatee, if you don't have one.

I am a good looking guy by what most people tell me, been voted into beautifulpeople.com

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I just come on here these days to give advice and read interesting threads. Gone are the days when I came to seek advice and validation.

Maybe you should stop submitting your pic on the internet and asking to get voted into whateverthatsite. Clearly you are lacking confidence (which you have admitted already), and doing all that "vote for me" blah blah stuff is a huge turn off for anyone.

You have issues because you are basing your beliefs on information found on the internet and not real life.

Until you try things in real life for yourself (and not listening to what other peoples say) this won't change.

Psychologists might help although I think it's just a waste of money because if you don't teach your brain that what you believe is bullshit you won't change.

You only see a psychiatrist/psychologist if your problem is affecting your daily life. Personally, I would settle for a psychologist as a last resort. Your self talk is really messing with your head. Maybe some cognitive psychotherapy will be able to help you out. I have seen your posts before and no amount of advice being given is helping you at all. Not even the quantity of people giving you the same advice is resonating with you. I say go for it if you don't know how to deal with it on your own.


Dean A.

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A psychiatrist is an individual who can prescribe you medicine to treat various mental conditions. They often combine behavioral therapy with medication. This is recommended if you have a chronic or severe mental illness which prohibits you from actually achieving your goals.

For less mild mental conditions or false beliefs, they can usually be treated by a therapist. A therapist is an individual who helps you to sort your life for a gradual transition towards the lifestyle you want. Unlike a psychiatrist they can't prescribe you medicine, and rely solely on a client's ability to learn and grow on their own. These individuals are akin to life coaches, and serve to help slowly desensitize you to false or limiting self-beliefs. Such an individual is someone who should be used by most individuals. Most people have false beliefs or conditions that can simply be fixed with effort, patience, and time.

What you need is a life coach or a therapists to help you sort out your bull shit. I would recommend that you do a little study prior to actually seeking out a mental professional. The UK is excellent in providing mental health. As the UK has a UHC system which provides HC to the general population. The U.S. not so much. It is very important that you investigate the type of therapist you want prior to going to a therapist. Certain therapist do certain things.

Hope this helps.

Whilst a PUA can teach your confidence, most likely s/he has no psychiatric or medical training.

A psychiatrist or even a psychologist can teach you how to be more confident. Simply shop around for a good one.

Guys get rejected for a number of reasons. Your not even that dark man, look all the people straight from India with an accent that will never go away. Or the guy that for some reason sounds feminine. Maybe he has a big nose. THESE ARE THINGS YOU CANNOT CHANGE!

Not being able to close or bag this girl or that can happen for any number of reasons. The end result is the same. . If the womans is that much of a goddamn rascist, and that shallow, would you want a relationship with her? And if the girls on the slutty side...well, she's probably had all shapes and colors. So think about that for a minute.