bro the whole trying to meet up / texting was a MISTAKE

LISTEN to what shes telling you.

dont think shes trying to play games cuz shes NOT

give her space dude. go enjoy yourself for a few weeks. seriously.

i know its hard.

I wouldn't say it was a mistake. leaving with "take care" no matter if it goes one way or the other. I leave with a higher value than previously.

women get all emotional and retarded. she doesnt want to see you. seeing you/hearing from you/anything to do with you is giving her BAD emotions at the moment.

say something " i totally understand, sorry you feel that way."

and just leave it alone.

saying "take care" is showing youre all butt hurt.

dont be overly dramatic.. you both know your going to speak again/ see each other again at some point.

so saying "take care" as if your trying to have some finality on the issue aint gonna work. she will see thru it.

just my opinion

I do see what you mean and it is good advice. I just feel like the above text(knowing her well) would have more of a impact than just saying "im sorry you feel that way". That was the last text im going to send to her for a while so as long as I leave with higher value than previously, im happy.

"Completely understandable. Take care of yourself." is what I would reply with (without expecting her to reply). This conveys you're at peace with the idea, and that you're moving on. You're walking out with your head held high and in the end this is the best DHV you can do given your cards in your hand. As per my last message, your next step is to game other girls. She'll take note. She'll get jealous. Or you'll forget about her. Eitherway, this is the best way out. There's nothing else you can do to save both your relationship and dignity.

_________________
Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

Thanks for all your help. One last thing after a certain amount of Time would you send a message to her to re-engage? With the possible outcome of time refreshing things and she saying yes to meetup. Just a thought.

It would be tempting, but you're better off writing her off as a loss.

_________________
Before she can respect you, you need to respect yourself.

Ok so, even though it is better to write her off. Can anyone give a good re engaging text after a while. Im going to give it a shot.

IMO, your only shot is to do NOTHING. You tried, she said she need space, so you have to give her space. And there is no time frame... She will text you when she is ready.. It could be couple of days (in which case you should ignore it) or in couple of months... But she will contact you 100% sure.

Patience can make wonders, and impatience usually make disasters...

I just wanted to share this because I found it really helpful. Found it on another thread on this site. Might help a few other people in my situation as well.





Listen buddy, dont take this the wrong way but youre right, this is dead in the water now.

Look at how much youre over thinking everything. The ideal way to handle this situation to give the best possible chance of her doing a 180 and coming back is to ignore her to the max. I mean cut her out and ignore the shit out of her. No contact at all. No clicking on her shit, in fact just stay the hell away from facebook or any of that shit for a month or so. Delete her number. But all the shit that reminds you of her in a carrier bag and put it under your bed. Ive done this three times now and love check on the bag when im with some one new, read through the valentines day cards and all that shit and realise that it makes me happy and represents progress rather that it tearing me to pieces.

You shouldnt be shopping with her. You shouldnt be bike riding with her. You shouldnt be speaking to her at all and you sure as hell shouldnt be picking her up and whizzing her about for lunch. Are you kidding me? Dude, this sucks right now. I broke up with my gf a few days ago because I felt i wanted to improve as a person. Its hard as hell but you have to give yourself a chance. You cant get over this by remaining in contact with her, its impossible. Its like trying to quit being an alcoholic but still drinking every day.

You have to cut her out. Ironically this is not just best for you but it also represents the best chance of her coming back. All she wants from you now is gay guy/girlfriend bullshit lunch dates and shopping trips whilst she shops for a guy that will treat her significantly worse than you. This sucks pal and i do not doubt it, but if you are so determined to have her back do NOT text her, do not speak to her.

The things you ARE doing right is woring out staying fit etc etc. Thats brilliant and the fact you arent just moping aout suggests you already have the mental fortitude to get all the way over her and move on. She doesnt want to be with you, she just doesnt want to be made to feel like she made a mistake. If you ignore her and do not give a shit about, meeting new girls in the process and generally improving yourself, THIS is making her feel like she made a mistake.

However talking to her, shopping with her and buying a brazil t shirt, which she even had to point out herself was a poor move!) IS making her feel like she made the right decision because it communicates to her that you dont have the self esteem and pride to move on and not let some one mess you about.

A break up is one big test of character and you can either go out with a bang of no contact and leave her day dreaming about what youre up to for the rest of her life, or you can fade out with a wimper to become one of her beta orbiters.

The choice is yours, good luck pal I know this is hard.

Breakup is a test of the man's character, because ultimately, the guy or gal who breaks it up break it up for good.

If the girl breaks it up, then the guy will never have a chance to make it up. Usually if the guy has a sense of integrity and love of himself and his self-worth, he'll just chalk it up as lesson learned and then he moves on.
Some guys who rely on women to get love then get stuck in this loop of trying hard to get her back. You can't and it simply illustrates that the man that needs to work on himself first before he goes out dating again. When a man loves himself and knows his self-worth, women will naturally be attracted to him because women needs love. You don't need to do a thing. It's weird, but you're a magnet to them. The more the man LOVES himself, the more women need that love from this man! They are willing to trade this love for sex hint hint!! The good thing is that, not a heck of a lot men love themselves so if you know how to love yourself, you wouldn't worry about your woman. Most people equate sex = love, but that's only external stimuli of pleasure with a finite effective limit and depending on how well you play the game, you can probably inch it pass 2 years or 4 years but not 10 yrs or 20 yrs down the line in a long term relationship. Because external stimuli can only go so far. No one gets happy taking drugs for a life time.

Nice post.

Today marks the 4th day of no contact. I will post the updates here.

I hope things work out, PM me for some REAL advice.

http://www . youtube . com/watch?v=06UnHtD1ZbY

Watch that man (without spaces), Tyler talks about break-ups and its one of the things that helped ground me so early after the break up.

I'm pretty much going through something similar(a week after the breakup and 3 days of no contact and will continue until I'm whole again) and it sucks at first but you really do have to move on. Once you've realized that you still have yourself and that's what matters then you will reach the level of not giving a shit and being fine without her and only then will that be your best chance to get her back. But for now just remember this is another chance to center yourself as a person and reach levels of your game that you never reached before.

Btw if you want to check out my thread you should as well I was bummed out about my situation as well maybe you can get something out of it.


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