Updating info...
She asked me to go with her on holydays. We agreed to go together to Oporto, Portugal.
Long story short, same story as it has always been. Holding hands, massages etc. I massaged her bare ass and she complained a little but when I tried to go further she refused. I even ask her whether she would make love with me while we were visiting the city in the morning and she told me she didn't know. WTF? I strongly suspect she need me so much -in her very special way- that she does whatever she feels could work to keep me in the place she likes, as her eternal admirer that will always be there when she sends a SPAM or whatever.
I had a very bad week. I did an EMDR session with my therapist (google that if you are interested in therapies) and all I could do was cry and cry. For nearly 50 minutes.
And so new year's eve comes, and she will probably go to the same place I go. And all I cant think of is how jealous wil I feel if someone, anyone hits on her. Today she sent me a message like How do you do, handsome? In these lines. Whatever.
I need solid pieces of advice. Badly.