LTR with a significantly older woman



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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 2:13 am 
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I have a hypothetical situation for everyone:

Let's say you're 23 years old. A 35 year old woman comes along who happens to be amazing in bed. She has a great job, is extremely attractive, and fulfills pretty much all of your criteria for what you'd look for in a relationship. You had no idea she was 35 since she looks like she's your age, and she had no idea you were 23 since you're cunning, handsome, and skillful at all facets of life. ;)

Is the age difference enough to put you off and prevent you from entering a LTR? Please explain your rationale regardless of your answer.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 2:30 am 
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Well shit, if she's got everything you want in a woman, why not? If you love her enough to enter a LTR what could go wrong?


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 3:13 am 
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Yeah, that's how I see it too. I don't know though, I feel like she'd be dead by the time I retire. I overthink things too much sometimes.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 4:19 pm 
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open relationship, and see how she compares to other girls


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 4:22 pm 
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Milk it for what it's worth untiil her looks eventually crack. Although once she hits menopause you can creampie her without having to worry about pregnancies...

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 6:20 pm 
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[quote="Snarg"]I have a hypothetical situation for everyone:

Let's say you're 23 years old. A 35 year old woman comes along who happens to be amazing in bed. She has a great job, is extremely attractive, and fulfills pretty much all of your criteria for what you'd look for in a relationship. You had no idea she was 35 since she looks like she's your age, and she had no idea you were 23 since you're cunning, handsome, and skillful at all facets of life. ;)

Is the age difference enough to put you off and prevent you from entering a LTR? Please explain your rationale regardless of your answer.[/quote]

Been there done that at the exact age stamps. lol.

Not going to happen. Prepare for a rocky road after it progresses from good fun sex to a complicated and nightmarish relationship if you'd even call it that.

Most cougars i've come across want a toy boy and see nothing in an LTR with a younger man. There's a cut off point and you need to recognise that no matter what you do, even if you're a billionaire she's going to cut you loose eventually. She's already got a sell by date on whatever relationship it is you have be it casual, serious or just fuck buddies.

More objectively: No. No because i've gone through it and know it can't work. I'd have fun with them but never allow it to get serious in any shape or form simply because you can't have a serious LTR with someone who's in their 30's when your early to mid 20's.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 7:31 pm 
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Quote:
Although once she hits menopause you can creampie her without having to worry about pregnancies...
That's a fucking enormous selling point, honestly.
Quote:
Quote:
I have a hypothetical situation for everyone:

Let's say you're 23 years old. A 35 year old woman comes along who happens to be amazing in bed. She has a great job, is extremely attractive, and fulfills pretty much all of your criteria for what you'd look for in a relationship. You had no idea she was 35 since she looks like she's your age, and she had no idea you were 23 since you're cunning, handsome, and skillful at all facets of life. ;)

Is the age difference enough to put you off and prevent you from entering a LTR? Please explain your rationale regardless of your answer.
Been there done that at the exact age stamps. lol.

Not going to happen. Prepare for a rocky road after it progresses from good fun sex to a complicated and nightmarish relationship if you'd even call it that.

Most cougars i've come across want a toy boy and see nothing in an LTR with a younger man. There's a cut off point and you need to recognise that no matter what you do, even if you're a billionaire she's going to cut you loose eventually. She's already got a sell by date on whatever relationship it is you have be it casual, serious or just fuck buddies.

More objectively: No. No because i've gone through it and know it can't work. I'd have fun with them but never allow it to get serious in any shape or form simply because you can't have a serious LTR with someone who's in their 30's when your early to mid 20's.
Have you only experienced this once, though? To my surprise, everyone else I've asked both on the internet and in real life have said that age should not make a difference and does not affect a relationship that strongly. This is the first directly negative comment toward it that I've heard.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 8:01 pm 
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It is whatever you want Snarg. We cannot really dictate your life. Sometimes decisions have to be made. I see this as a learning experience and from the description the woman sounds like a good deal. Why not see where it goes? If she meets your wants and needs and you both get along well, then go for it. Time to weigh the pros and cons. Some PUA books have readers do an exercise where they make the person write down their beliefs about themselves and what they want in a woman. I suggest you see where you stand on this.


Also a lot can happen during a relationship, so you never know if you are going to be with someone forever. This leads to up to disappointment in my opinion if you believe in together forever quotes, so always be prepared to adapt. Just my thoughts.


Age is not enough to deter me from getting into a relationship with someone. I would have to be either unhappy during it or factor in other things such as logistics(ex. I won't be living in that particular area in the next year).

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PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2012 8:18 pm 
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[quote="Snarg"]

Have you only experienced this once, though? To my surprise, everyone else I've asked both on the internet and in real life have said that age should not make a difference and does not affect a relationship that strongly. This is the first directly negative comment toward it that I've heard.[/quote]

Yep, I have. Had people say the same stuff to me about how a relationship is what you make of it and "age is but a number". Age isn't just a number to a woman, not if the guy they're seeing is 10+ years younger.

You'll get about three months out of it before it takes a turn for the worse but don't expect a LTR. Those three months start from the second time you sleep with her(Second time in the one night doesn't count).


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PostPosted: Fri Nov 09, 2012 6:29 pm 
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I pretty much have this going on now, she is 34 and I am 24 and there is no FUCKING way I would LTR her.

Reasons being;

1 - She is in here 30's man! How long is a horny 30 year old women going to last without fucking something else? Unless she already has kids which she doesn't in my case.

2 - Dinner parties are going to be no fun, other people will ruin that shit for you with stupid awkward questions because they are dicks lol. I know we shouldn't care about other peoples opinions but lets be real.

3 - That bitch is going to want to have kids soon! They arn't just for Christmas you know?

4 - When you are 40 and still wanting to party she is going to be 50 and fat....

And lastly, fucking having LTR (monogamous ones anyway)

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PostPosted: Fri Nov 09, 2012 6:50 pm 
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I was one of those assholes who made a stupid comment about a May/December couple. He was 30 and she was 40 and I was like "So, are you a cougar?!?" Hardy har har... It was lame, I know. But that's the kind of dumb shit you'd have to put up with.

My old roommate was 23 and his gf was 36. She was a hot milf with fake tits and a scorching alcohol and cocaine problem. I remember after several months it going bad. There were stalkerish messages on the answering machine. She even spray painted drunken bullshit all over our sidewalk, entry way and parking spaces. And dude kept going back to her and cheating on his new gf, it was really bad.

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PostPosted: Fri Nov 09, 2012 7:47 pm 
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FWIW, yes it can work, but yes be prepared for a bumpy ride. Age certainly is a number only--however, people separated by a decade or two can have -extremely- different things they want out of life and -extremely- different ways of dealing with life. Be prepared to put your mature hat on for the deeper LTR stuff. This speaking from someone who is always accused of being mature beyond his years; it is a hard adaptation.

I don't mean to talk you out of it, but just to prepare you for what -may- happen. Best of luck.


Max


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 10, 2012 4:01 pm 
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I don't see what's the problem here. Just go for it :)

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 10, 2012 6:19 pm 
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I've decided to just see what happens. If it works, it works. If not, oh well, that's some unique experience gained. It's not every day you have a woman 13 years older than yourself who is openly interested in you. At least not me.

Thanks to everyone for the responses! They are very much appreciated.


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 10, 2012 8:06 pm 
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I've decided to just see what happens. If it works, it works. If not, oh well, that's some unique experience gained. It's not every day you have a woman 13 years older than yourself who is openly interested in you. At least not me.

Thanks to everyone for the responses! They are very much appreciated.


You seem to be looking for an outcome, which is never good(i can even sense mild onitis vibes), keep dating and meeting other women. The chances of this working are extremely low, you are 23 your level of maturity is not there( practically you are between a teenager and manhood) her biological clock may be ticking she may want "babies" unless she already have some, with is likely which creates another problem all together, she will get tempted to play the mama role and try to change you, you may not be able to get away with stuff, she seen and experience probably everything there is to know, she may want to tie down... Your sleeping around at 23 is not probably out of your system even if you engage in monogamy, the wanting to be with other women will kick in eventually. With all of this being said i bet you the sex is super AWESOME, which also could be misleading... Good luck!

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