So i'm pretty sure something is wrong here.
I think the best way to describe my personality when it comes to being with woman is being aloof.
I don't really show any interest, I usually try to keep conversations short and go do something else. I don't like being occupied with one person only.
In my career (about 400 students) i was voted the best looking, so I definitely don't have problems in the looks department.

This past semester I had only about 3 hook-ups with girls and they were all at clubs only, no sex, just dancing and kissing. And, I didn't make the move, they took control. I think this might be an area where I'm going wrong. I enjoy it when the girl does the work than when I do cause it obviously makes me feel like the 'prize', but I'm not getting the results I want, I know I could be getting way more hook ups, but I honestly don't think my inner-game is too good. I know i'm good looking but at the same time I'm not that confident talking to or approaching women I don't know.

It is so bad to the point I've even had friends tell me "that girl was totally on you and you didn't do anything", about girls who are actually good looking.. I guess I just don't know what to do when the time comes around. Sometimes I don't even realize that the girls are giving me IOI's, I just act like i'm un-affected by everything.. I want to start being the person who takes control more, I dont want to wait forever for shit to happen, but I don't know how exactly to change..

I know other guys in my school who are taking girls to their places every other weekend but I can't really figure it out.. I think I need to drop the 'aloof' attitude and start working more from my part but not too sure how, because this is how I naturally am.

anyone know what is going on here or have some tips for me?
thanks

You already know what's going on. Standing around and waiting for them to come to you is the problem you've described and the one you need to fix. I could spend hours explaining to you.

Identify your sticking points. Is the problem that you can't approach women because you're scared? Start talking to people in elevators, on the street, in the grocery store. Just spend time in the mall approaching everyone and just say HI! It's that simple. Break down your own walls and you'll find talking to girls that much easier

Basically.. You know what's wrong. There's a huge resource in this website, and in many others. One I really liked was the Real Social Dynamics videos. Tyler Durden (worst nick name ever since he's nothing like the fight club character) might be a douche but his lessons are fantastic. There's a lot more.. google is your best friend.

Good luck

Nice honest post ! Yea, being "aloof" definitely isn't the most efficient way to be doing things, I mean just think about it, girls are often FAR more shy and insecure about being the ones making moves (physical and things like asking for a number or to hangout). It's a cruel world, life's not fair, but for better or worse it's our job as men to be making moves on girl's we're interested in. On the bright side, this means the worst we have to deal with is some attractive flattered girl denying our advances, and oftentimes attractive girls you would have never thought twice about fall in your lap. Anyway i'm kinda rambling but I think you're doing great if you're considered goodlooking and you're realizing that most girls would definitely return interest. I mean, if some random goodlooking chick showed interest in you or me we'd probably look into it. Haha.

_________________
Every girl is different. But not TOO different.

In the end, It's not about girls.

I don't know about aloof, what works is being relaxed, self-amused. not outcome dependent, confident... You need to be the man and initiate the interaction, stop protecting your ego, approach, do not over think. If clubbing is your thing check out my stuff.

_________________
Learn the proper way to maximize your results in a dancefloor/club environment, check out my blog and youtube channel:
http://www.dancefloorseduction.com

Dancefloor/Club game youtube channel:
http://www.youtube.com/dancefloorseduction

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GtkST5-ZFHw[/youtube]

but on a serious note...

I personally take AA as a personal attack from my brain to my will. It's as if my mind is consciously trying to tie me up from living the kind of live I want. Probably it's a protection mechanism but what does it say about our minds' opinion of us? It says we think that we're weak. Our minds think subconsciously that we're so weak that we can't even handle talking to a fucking woman. So to me when I get AA I just try to get stubborn and prove myself that I'm strong and I don't need to hide behind excuses. Do what you want. Not out of fear, insecurity or cowardice. Act according to your free will. The rest is details.


[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_Vg4uyYwEk[/youtube]

Acting aloof all the time will make a woman feel worthless and acting interested all the time will make her feel smothered.

The key to keeping women interested is blowing hot and cold and keeping them in suspense so they never know what will happen next.

_________________
Women are smarter than you think... but not as smart as THEY think

There is a significant difference between being aloof and using "being aloof" as an excuse for your anxiety. You fall into the latter one.

Understand that the concept of being aloof doesn't mean you don't need to do anything and it will rain women into your laps. Being aloof simply just means don't act needy or desperate, you don't take life seriously and people can't easily get a raise out of you. You control your own reality and frame. You still need to show interest and game the girls in order to generate attraction with them. You still need to escalate in order to get them in bed.

Here is an example. You're sitting under an apple tree, you can't expect for the apples to just fall into your hands. You don't have to desperately climb the tree to pluck them but once in a while you kick the trunks for the ripe ones to fall.

_________________
,___,
[O.o] .: Survival Guide For Online Dating
/)__) .:Tips To Significantly Improve Your Online Game
-"--"-

here is a new idea for you,

figure out what you want in a girl, seriously sit down, it can be related to looks or personality, but figure out all the traits you want in your perfect ideal girl, lets say you could have any girl in the world, the perfect girl, how would she be for you, what traits would she possess, you could have any girl both personality wise and looks wise, write it down, and really focus on it and have a clear idea of what the perfect girl is

once you have an idea of what you are looking for in the perfect girl, start finding out if the girls you are speaking to are anything close to that ideal

as for your behavior, don't act, just be, express yourself in social situations so that you are enjoying yourself, and do what makes you feel happy, as opposed to doing what you think will make others happy

if you are ever unsure of what to do, just ask yourself one of two questions, what do I want to do? (do not confuse this with ''what do others want me to do?''), and how could I make this situation more enjoyable for myself?

then follow up with the answer you came up with, and put thought into motion

next off, here is a physical routine stack for you, you want to find out where a girl's limits are, sit at just below the limit, when you think she is comfortable with that level of touching, test the limit again, rinse and repeat until she has clearly expressed she does not like what you are doing, or you have reached P into V, don't stagnate, move things forward

-touch a girl on the shoulder
-put your arm around her
-give her a hug
-get her to kiss you on the cheek/kiss her on the cheek
-kiss her on the mouth
(wait until you are alone with her in a spot where sex can happen before continueing the stack)
-make out with her
-feel her up
-finger bang her
-P into V

^ this is your new stack, follow the fuckin program, tust the program, believe in the program, don't stray or think there is something special you have to do, execute the fucking program, if you can't get her comfortable with that, don't chase, replace, always be meeting new girls, when in set keep her mind occupied with verbal vomit and excute the damn stack, you can skip steps if you are feeling adventourous

now, lastly
-interest, when that question inside your head goes off ''what do I want right now?'' and the answer is, sex with this girl in front of me, fucking be congruent with that (in other words, if you are not feeling aloof, don't be aloof, be how you are and be shameless about it)

after you have fucked a good 4-5 girls, and you feel like this is more simple then you originally thought, then go back to the drawing board and start experimenting with the pua material you liked, field test everything on a good 20-100 girls, take what you like and keep it, disguard what doesn't work for you

GOOD LUCK