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This is going to be the thing that will elevate you to greater conquests my friend. I was in a similar situation, went on antidepressants for one girl, and then snapped out of it. I know this is tough.
Keep your contact MINIMAL.
DO NOT rage on her. Act indifferent and upbeat (hard at this point, I know, but try your best).
That's the thing.. I can probably act up beat and happy.. I could even be happy enough to invite her to my house after work and try to get with her. (I'm actually considering this... bad idea?)
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You are deeply in the friendzone and you know it. She is getting with others. You care she is getting with them. SHE DOESN'T. Why? Because she thinks things between the two of you are friendly. HARD TRUTH: When she is sticking her tongue down another man's throat she isn't thinking about you at all. She is enjoying every bit of his saliva. She is letting him touch her places.
Exactly right.. my mind is wondering if she is at all thinking about me, when I know that she isn't.. I keep trying to tell myself that she is going to text me at any moment etc, when I know it's not happening.
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Now, think this over. You know you messed up (it's perfectly fine to mess up). You told her she likes you. And she doesn't care about it at all. Does she deserve your contact? Exactly WHAT is she bringing into this relationship you both have apart from her looks? You can even say that you need time off with her to clear your head. Because fucking hell, you have a crush on her, and if she doesn't understand that, make it clear. If she still goes "But why?" then she is stupid, because she is not respecting your subconscious feelings.
I did mess up, and I'm frustrated at myself more than anything. It's my fault for not trying to get with her, and now look where it's left me. If I had just made the move - even if I had been rejected. I'd still feel better than I do right now. I have only myself to blame.. but I still want to get with her.. so badly. It is mainly her looks.. she's just hot, we both get along well.. but then she gets along with a lot of guys. To me she seems more unique, but to her I'm probably just another guy.
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All the advice in this thread is great and is gearing you to MOVE ON. NO CONTACT. MOVE ON. NEXT.
No contact is tough though, especially when we work at the same place. I say to myself that I'm not interested but when I see her again all the feeling rush back. I want to stay close to her, but the next time me and her get close like that (stroking her face, playing with her hair) I'm going to make sure I have the balls to make a move.
Is that what I should do anyway? Did she want me to make the move? She was absolutely loving it when I was stroking her face and hair etc.. she closed her eyes all in relaxation etc.. I'm pretty sure friends don't do that. I just can't believe I didn't make the move.. it's left me in such a shitty place.