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I'm not sure being alpha is really my goal. A lot of it seems either petty or immoral. A lor of it seems to go against who I am. For example, I've read countless times about how it is important to talk slowly or to not be fidgety but that is pretty opposite to me. I am the most animated person I know and I like to talk fast because I have a lot of ideas and things to say that I am excited to share.
Other parts of being alpha seem to be phony like the specific reactions to things which seem to suck the fun of living in the moment. Others still seem like psychological tricks like not caring if you get rejected. Well, not caring if you get rejected just makes rejection easier not necessarily causing more success with women though.
And it all seems to fall under a certain submission to the nature of women. A way of acting to get women rather than acting how you want. It seems like a bigger prison than being beta is.
First of all, welcome to the forums.
Second, the PUA term for the alpha male is not grounded in science. It's just a marketing label to sell Alpha Male products. Strictly speaking from a scientific perspective, being alpha is being first. And no it's not a permanent state but a temporary one. You could have won a rodeo championship in a certain state for a given year hence you're alpha for that year and many women will be attracted to you. However, the next year, another champion takes your place.
But you have to see this in the proper light. The guy who never won a championship competition or never experienced being first in any area of his life will attract less women than the guy who experienced being alpha at least once in his life. Being alpha has its positive residues and these traits are: (a) confidence and (b) dominance.
What you want to learn about is to be more dominant; not exactly becoming a leader which is another misnomer for the term "alpha". Not all people can be leaders but that doesn't mean they can't be dominant. Moreover, not all leaders are alpha. We have beta leaders too in real life.
Dominance (not a domineering attitude) is a sexually attractive trait to feminine women. Meanwhile, submissiveness or non-dominance is also a sexually attractive trait to women, only this time it's the masculine women that non-dominant men attract.
Of course, we have more feminine women than masculine women. A masculine woman is someone like Anna Span, the porn director at the PUA Lounge. You'll see there that the guy who got Anna's attention was the most feminine man among the posters.
You'll either have to learn dominant qualities to attract feminine women who number more than masculine women or stay as you are and try to attract the few masculine women.
If you want better odds at attracting women, then you'll have to learn the pleasant dominant qualities that attract more women. You don't have to be a leader to attract more women or act "alpha" to get them. All you need to do is place your bet on the skills that you want to learn so your chances of getting what you want are higher.

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