This thread, as the title implies, is specifically for certain newbie pointers. Things that will help any newbie to start changing their mindset. To start their growth toward mPUA.

Picture this:

You walk into a venue, look around, see a HB10 standing 10 feet in front of you. She never makes eye contact. She doesn't need to.

Freeze time. You hear the clock stop ticking? The heartbeats and breathing have stopped too. Now, let's turn this scene around. You're flying through space for just a moment as you are transported into the HB10's mind.

The world suddenly look different. You feels eyes staring at you. You hear people whispering, no doubt about you. Guys drooling, tripping over their words. Girls gossiping about you to make themselves feel better.

You sigh, but only on the inside. You surely can't let the world know how you feel. You secretly wish a man would come up to you and present himself to you. You have tons of guys hit on you everyday, but all they do is tell you how hot you are, or how much they want to fuck you, or how they will literally pay all of your bills and take care of you. They even go as far as telling you that you will never have to worry about anything for the rest of your life . . . if only you will be with them. How boring. It frustrates you to no end. Why can't you just have a man come up and talk to you? You desperately need some excitement in your life. A real man that will get your blood moving. A man that will turn your internal flame on high, and keep it there. One that will make you smile, and laugh. One that isn't so predictable that you will know his every single move . . . a year ahead.

If only you could find a man that would know how to touch you. How to make you crave him. Instead of the typical guy that just thinks of his own pleasure. If only those guys knew that you never even came, though you made them think you did, just to get rid of them.

You don't even care if this man had money, although that would be a plus. But, if this man could excite you, that alone would be awesome. He doesn't even have to look like Brad Pitt.

Now, if only that guy that just walked into the room was that man that I'm secretly craving . . . if only . . . but he's not. How do I know? Because he's still standing there, staring at me. And I haven't even looked at him.

*sigh*

Just like every other guy that crosses my path every single day . . .

And now, you're ripped back out of her head, and warped back into your own body. Taking a few seconds to settle, you look down at yourself, realize she/you were just talking about yourself. You are that guy that just walked in. The one that's still staring at her, but hasn't approached her. And it's too late. Her opinion is already set of you. You've been standing like some robot, frozen in time.

Ah yes, speaking of frozen in time, let's start the heartbeats back up, start the breathing, and finally, get the clocks ticking again.

That glimpse into a 10's mind is now fading quickly away into the voices of the daily world. Let's not the lesson fade so quickly.

If men had a rating system, I'd be an 11.

Someone gimme a hug. *Sniff*

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afc-challenge-to-the-masters-social-anx ... 10108.html

what tripp is tryin to say is that attractive women WANT you to approach them, they just dont want you to tell them the same shit every other guy in the tri-county area will tell her. she is yours for the taking. but, she can still be intimidating. so, if you see this hb10 one day, and you think to yourself, she is outta my league, then you are incredibly mistaken. no one out of your league, its all just a matter of confidence, and it does take time to work it up. so start slow. set goals for you're self. next time you go out, set a minimun # of sets to open with moderatly attractive girls. then as you progress, increase the numer and increase how hot the women are that attract you. then start to learn some day game. learn how to utalize all the skills you have aquired through doing so, and pretty soon, that hb10 will be begging you for a date.

best of luck,

PB

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"He is god, he will understand. And if he does not, then he is not god, and we need not worry."
http://pickuplabs.com/blog/ Pick-Up Labs, lots of cool shit guys, free!

here is something i posted on another forum but may help newbies. remember, this is a lifestyle change not something you can just clunk on to your existing life. be prepared to make some sacrifices

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i am taking things from the inside out instead of the outside in. when you learn things from the outside in, you will be influenced by a lot of things in life and you will result as something that doesnt fit your personality or you wont experience things for yourself.

what do i mean by this? say some guy sees someone wearing a large hat and figures that it is peacocking so he decides to walk around with a hat on. he may get some different responses but wont know how to handle it because his self wont be used to those interactions. over time you will find ways to make it work but in reality its not you. its just you coping with your new environment. does this mean that you shouldnt peacock? no. but you have to understand the philosophy behind peacocking and understand its inner relevance. mystery wears a large hat in a way that makes him take on his persona as a magician. that is him. he started out being his nerdy self but then over time worked on his inner game and became this great performer and illusionist which in turn lead to his success with women. he was able to use his performance skills and dress the act so when he is out in field, he is using pua skills but it is him that is picking them up not a bunch of memorized routines that he read on the internet and try to force it into his life.

really focus on who you are and what qualities about yourself you can use to your advantage. fit these things into your daily life and you will perfect your natural self which in turn will get you success.

i knew that my body language was hurting me and showed people the me that i used to be when i was going through tough stuff in my life. no matter how much i tried new things on the internet or tried gimmicks, my true self was showing. i realized that instead of just fixing my appearance, i should fix my self. i got my life together, set goals, and really figured out how i could better myself. from there, i still had some bad habits that needed fixing

instead of driving to work like usual, i would walk 10 minutes to work. this gave me the ability to improve my health, save money, and at the same time experiment with self image. i saw a video of a david deangelo seminar where he had a dancer come and show people how to walk. i would take that 10 minute walk and focus on walking better. it showed more grace and confidence in my stride. also, i would walk past a bus stop where there were always people. usually i would just look down and not at them. now, i walk past with my head up and stare them straight in the eye and hold the gaze until they look away. you will be surprised how many girls will smile at you or how many guys will look down showing your dominance.

i downloaded a singing dvd off the internet called "the zen of screaming". it was an instructional video on how you can scream like a metal screamer. this really helped me out because it showed me how to talk to people and which part of my body i used to communicate. as lame as this might sound this really helps. i was skeptical which made me put it off but it has really improved me a lot. i hung out with some old friends yesterday and my body language on top of my deeper more confident voice gave them the impression that i was in control of things in my life. they didnt outright say this but subconsciously they were doing things that let me know this. whenever i talked everyone would stop talking and listen to me. even if i said something stupid they were laughing. even my friends gf was giving me ioi's. crazy stuff right? and all of this is just with my posture and voice tonality.

what you should get out of this is the knowledge that you need to fix yourself before you can have others like you. find out what is wrong with your life and improve upon it. dont just take a bunch of little things that have helped people and become some pseudo pua that doesnt understand the dynamics and is still hurting inside. be a man and take control. you may not be very social for a while while you try to figure this out but even if your life doesnt get instant gratification, you have the knowledge that you are in control of your destiny and your body. take that and experiment with stuff that will improve your good qualities and traits that will express yourself. after this, women, among other things, will come naturally in life

Something that I have learned in my experiances in sets, its very simple.

Just remember this and you wont feel intimidated:

They are just girls! They are putting on an act, but in reality they are just timid, little girls....they are just trying to be "hot" and its all an act. U r a man, u r ALPHA in fact. Its like u r a teacher and they are the kids in the class. U r in charge! U r the man, they need to prove themselves to you! They are JUST GIRLS!

Now dont get me wrong here, I have a lot of respect for women, but thinking of them in this way on the aproach makes it SO MUCH EASIER. Try it. Keep telling yourself that, "they are just freakin girls!".

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Kinoescalator
5 for 5 MPUA

"Life is short, when its done u cant start over"

The most GENIUS thing that Mystery has said (in my opinion):

"Gaming tens...is not harder than gaming a 6. It's just...different.
It takes the EXACT SAME amount of time, but there's just variating
factors in the pickup that take place."

That's brilliant. He's absolutely correct, too. Think about it for a sec.

Like Lucid said; congruency is of the uttmost importance. It plays a huge role in how attractive you are as a person, just by watching someone, you can tell if they are faking it, or if they are being who they truly are (don't believe me, go watch enough porn and you'll figure it out).

If you go out dressed up like you're from "the hood" and you're a thug or something, but you go into a fancy club and start doing the tango with a girl, it's gonna be pretty messed up. Instead, you wear something that fits with what you're doing, probably a suit and tie, or at least something with style.

The same rules apply to all of pickup and pickup isn't just about getting girls, it's about building a life. Maybe you've heard this before, Mystery said it several times on the VH1 show, but a lot of people still don't grasp the depth of it. Being a PUA isn't about something you turn on and off, it isn't something you do when you go to clubs, being a PUA is being the guy that women want and men want to be. Strive for that and you won't need routines, you won't need gimmicks, because when you open your mouth people will listen, because you speak with intent and because you mean what you say, they will want to be near you because you make them feel good and they will love you, not because they want you for themselves, but because they love what you are.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Excellent quote T3R4BYT3. Thanks!

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Venusian Arts
Virgin -> 60+ Girls in 6 Months!

I posted this on another thread, but it helps identify where you fit in with your AFC behaviour.

Are you a Wussie?!? Look below at the different types of Wussies. Remember the Wussie tries to be sweet, nice, accomidating, and approval seeking type of person. I'm sure if you aren't one you know this person well.

The Victim - The tend not to take personal responsibility for their actions. They dramatize things in their life to get attention. Can't easily slip out on a bad day when you don't control your emotions. Let's say someone keyed your car, and you go out and start bitching. You secretly don't control your emotions, and the people you know realize it.

The Nice Guy- Believes he should go out of his way to be sweet nice and understanding no matter what the circumstances. They don't draw boundaries and stand up for themselves very often. They typically harbor in the inner belief that they are better than others because they are so nice. Remember, when you are being nice to get something back you are being manipulative.

The "Yes, but she's different wussie."- Many long term relationships are screwed up because of this. They don't be a wussie mindset is dropped and then she leaves shortly afterwards. When you talk to these guys, you get the you're probably right, but get off my case shoulder shrug. Typically, there is a comment about how this one is special.

The "I want her to like me for me wussie"- Many guys argue tooth and nail about the techniques. They don't feel they need to do anything differently. The "I want her to like me for me wussie, have an idealistic fantasy about a woman falling for who they are without them doing anything different. They go months and months without dates.

The "there's this one special girl wussie"- Also known as "one itis". You see these pop up on the forum a lot under the newbie posts or sticking points. To quote David D. ~ "If there is one question that I get so often that I could have a phaser stun gun to use on guys who ask it, it's this question. There's this one special girl, I got to have her, how do I get her question...The only thing this obsession says about you is you are a world class wussbag!" It's cool that you really like a girl, just don't get obsessed with her.

David D. ~ "When you let your inner wussbag out to roam freely, only bad things will happen!"

You have to realize you have to get leverage on yourself. In order to get leverage on yourself you write down the 3 things that you would like to do. Now write down 3 things that you are scared to do. Give the list of things you are scared to do and it to a friend with $50 so that they'll constantly ask you if you are doing them. Be accountable for your actions and change them.

Thanks to David DeAngelo for helping us recognize our inner wussie!

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Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Tripp, the insight you exhibited in the 10's mind was utterly amusing and informative, good job my friend. Thanks jsmooth, for posting the truth about wussies, and how to evaluate wussy behavior.

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i lust for jessica alba, but now since she is preggers. I am lusting for Nicole!!! It's New Year's Day. It was Ben Franklin who said, "Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man."

I think the philosophy that really helped me out when i first started is the "babe ruth" philosophy, we all know that ruth was one of the greatest home-run hitters ever, but he was also a huge strike-out artist. When i first started, my buddy said to me "listen, if you go up to 10 beautiful girls tonight and try to get their numbers, and 9 say no, you still have one beautiful girl's number" so don't be afraid to try. Not trying is worse than trying and failing. and you will be surprised just how much you will succeed.

heres an invaluble tip, guys:

Don't dwell on you're mistakes.

When I was still mentally incapable around women, I would occationally slip up in conversation. Ya know, make a bad joke about you're target that she doesnt find funny, call her by her friends/sisters name, all that jazz. And all at once my thoughts would focus to that mistake. And it would bring me down. I would feel stupid, mean and incompitant. and it was all self-inflicted. But one habit I have developed through a lot of repition and conscience effort is to not let myself be detremented by these mistakes. The other day I ran into this HB8 or 9 that I went on a date with like last May, but because of scheduals nothing ever happend. well we ended up hanging out for a couple hours and I scored 2 more dates with her. Now at some point in the conversation, i called her by her twins name. And I started to feel dumb and inconsiderate and all that, but I repressed it. I kept my composure and focused my thoughts as best I could on the continuing conversation.

Now-I cant say for sure if girls pay attention to or care about this kind of thing. I would like to tell you they dont and to just forget about it, but I cant say that with full confidence because I dont know. What I do know is that letting these mess ups distract you and bring you down does not assist you in seduction. So ya mess ups happen. but the more you think about it the worse it is. So train yourself, practice, to not allow yourself to get caught up in your mistakes. it makes such a difference in your confidence and, ergo your game.

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"He is god, he will understand. And if he does not, then he is not god, and we need not worry."
http://pickuplabs.com/blog/ Pick-Up Labs, lots of cool shit guys, free!

Good tip PrettyBoy41. Yes, the girls DO notice and pay attention to those mistakes, BUT they also notice when it DOESN'T affect your frame, which is the point you're driving home.

I have a couple more actually that just came to mind.

1. Don't over-negg. Once or twice is enough. Neggs shouldnt be your way into the conversation, they should be an accessory. If you're only open door to a conversation is a negg, you're frame is completely wrong and negging wont do you any good.

This second one I was gunna make as a whole new post, but I didnt know where to put it so ill just put it here.

One of the biggest U-turns in my social life came when I developed the ability to kind-of see things through women's eyes. Then I was able to re-evaluate my dress, my vernacular, the way I carried my self and the way people percieved me. I was able to aquire this ability by making a lot of girls friends.

Men communicate by demonstrating or proving that they are superior to their peers. thats just how we do. Women communicate by opening up their emotions to each other, thus creating a mutual emotional connection and a bond of friendship, much like men do with their rivals.
Now, this benefits us in to many ways to list, but one of them, is that when they open themselfs up to us, we gain insight to how they percieve things. Next time a girl tells you a story about w/e, try to imagine how she handled as apposed to how you would have handled it. Doing this will show you what was going through her head as it was playing out. After that moment, if that situation were to ever arise, you will be able to predict how the women present will react and percieve your actions because you know what so and so did wrong last time. I spent literally years hanging out with girls as close friends for the past couple of years and I can honesly say that not even learning the mathmatical equations of MM was as helpfull as gaining insight into the female psychy. So this is my best advice ever. Hang out with women. Analyse they're mind through they're stories and thus, carry the ability to behave as attractively as possible.

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"He is god, he will understand. And if he does not, then he is not god, and we need not worry."
http://pickuplabs.com/blog/ Pick-Up Labs, lots of cool shit guys, free!

Theres a ton of great info in this thread. Good jobb!

L.A. I love that little insight into the 10's mind that was great!

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-P.I.M.P