Hey guys,

A lot of my approaches aren't really going too well, and I think maybe it's because I'm coming off as weird. I do all my approaches at places like, the mall and Target and things, because there aren't any nightclubs in my small town and I'm one year shy of being able to get into bars. Here's what I do:

I'll go up to a girl shopping at a clothing store (I make sure not to approach her from behind or anything and try to keep a comfortable distance apart), smile, and say, "If you were my little sister and it was your birthday, would you rather have a gift card or an actual item?"

And they usually smile and indugle me. And everything's going great. After I get their opinion, I say thanks and rock out a little bit, then rock back in and say, "Let me get your opinion on something else..." And then go into Jealous Girlfriend opener. Now, usually she's cool for a little while, but I'd say 30 seconds into it, she starts to think the whole thing about me asking her random questions is weird. I can tell in her face that she's thinking that. This makes me uncomfortable and I usually eject as soon as I can, knowing that going into some kind of DHV story or routine would only exacerbate the awkwardness.

I was wondering if you guys think it's weird for me to randomly ask girls the Jealous Girlfriend question at JCPenny or some shit? I know it's acceptable at a club or bar where people are expecting to interact with new people, but what about at the grocery store? What I do at the grocery store is ask a girl, "Hey, I know you don't work here, but do you know where the bread is?" *get answer, rock out, rock in, go into Jealous Girlfriend* And I get the same response.

I think that maybe what it is, is that when I'm doing Jealous Girlfriend, I'm sort of conducting it like an interview, waiting for her responses and shit, instead of just trying to make it like I'm striking up a conversation. Since I can't show you a video of me doing it or anything, I was just wondering if any of what I'm saying, content-wise, sounded off?

Thanks a lot.

First of all ... **KINO** , you can go in from the back or front doesn't matter for shizz , aslong as u touch her , hand or even shoulder .. just lets her know you arn't afraid of asking anything and that you'r comfortable where you are. i'm not saying feal her up just give her a touch to let her know. If you go in with the vibe that your here to pick up girls your going to come across as that , go in with a good energy .. not too high not too low, and focus on her , if she replys like shes not interested or ses something u dont like , u can just look away ... dont turn ur entire body just turn ur head abit.also if it gets lame and sounds like ur asking too many questions its cos u dont have enough humour in the conversation. grocery store lines hmmm i got one for you
Pua - (*Kino*)
Pua - Hey do you know how to cook this ? / Where can i find xxx ? /

if she gives u a negative answere ,give her a negative answere back , dont take her shit. let her know ur not a wussy. let her know u eat bitches for breakfeast.

Pua - Hmmm ... so you dont ... neg optional-(well your not very helpfull now are you) , my DHV-girlfriend never could make good sandwhiches she always used to cut the bread scew or slice the cheese wrong .. damn it was terrible ... you look like u could be a good cook ?
HB - No i'm not
Pua - seriaasly ... your stock just plumpeted.
HB - bhahaha bla bla

oh and i'v done this before(dont wait for her to start walking away u must be in a conversation , get lots of threads going) works really well you can say "WAIT a SECOND and grab her arm *KINO* and be like did i just say Ex girlfriend or girlfriend" and then get into a whole subject about u still say that shit bla bla bla bla it goes on. sometimes they dont shutup.

false time constraints - toss one in aswell they usually help just dont use the lame ones u get off websites, make a good one up for ur self that u can use. fake it till u make it son.

oh and if i can make this shit up as i go along so can you.
Peace.

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just living the dream son.

I think you start off pretty well. I wouldn't use the Jealous Girlfriend opener. Because you already opened. You should really move into a DHV routine. Throw in a neg or something. You need to move forward and transition into A2. I have the same problem I get stuck on openers and never move forward. I think that might be your problem.

Yeah that's definetely your problem. You are stacking openers and they don't understand why. Imprint on your memory a few follow-ups that are not posed as questions, they are comments, so they are on the tip of your tongue and you can summon them at will, or out of desperation.

Good stuff guys.

Like was briefly mentioned, you have to stack your openers and DHV routines somehow, meaning you multi-thread or throw them at your target simultaneously. If this sounds confusing, think about what you talk about when you're with friends or family. There's always just a jumble of topics going on in conversation at any time, and whenever one topic dies down, the group tends to shift focus onto something more interesting---usually a thread that was kind of left "hanging" while you discussed the first topic.

So do this: Opener (w/ FTC intact, delivered on the go), rock out, opener again but interrupt yourself to DHV (notice her ring or something and do the ring routine), DHV, false disqualifier, another opener (can interrupt if you wish), rock out, DHV, resume the interrupted opener if convo dies down.

By this time you should be in A3, meaning your DHV's between innocuously placed openers should have piqued her interest and gotten her to show some IOI's. Now the pressure lets up somewhat as you get her to qualify herself---don't make it too easy!!! playfully neg her here depending on her HB rating---and really try to mean what you say about her qualities. Then state your own preferences and have them somewhat align with hers, unless you two are just really connecting on all cylinders, in which case you should go to C1 (insta-date!).

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afc-challenge-to-the-masters-social-anx ... 10108.html

walk up behind some woman in a social setting with alot of people slap her ass smile and walk away see if she follows you and strikes up a convosation lol it worked once for me i am pretty ballsey though

Agree with some of the replies that you stuck in openers and it's probably coming across as too much of an interview...

After your opener, I'd make a statement about her as a transition. You could make this a mini-neg if you wanted... Just anything to get a fun playful vibe going...

Then tell her a DHV story that gets her interest...

Be sure and keep the energy SLIGHTLY above hers and really be invested in what she has to say. Definitely throw in the FTC before you start the opener. I'd say start with the Jealous Girlfriend opener, rock away then go back into the "well it's a 2 part question" routine as a complete starter.

I too am only 3 months away from being 21 and getting into the bars/clubs around campus. I'm just waiting for my success to skyrocket after I am able to cover these social watering holes if you will...

In the mean time, just get used to talking to everyone! This will help you calibrate socially (for every interaction, not just pick-ups). You don't have to "open" them but just get the conversational rhythm down so you don't come across as "creepy" or "weird" Trust me, I also used to give off that negative vibe, but then I learned to just bounce it off. Remember whose reality you're in and go with it! I know I'm getting into inner game here but bear with me... One of the attitudes I like to focus on following, is by Pauly Shore's character "Crawl"(see he even has an alias too!) in the movie "The Son in Law" If you haven't seen it, watch it now! He definitely lives by his own rules and has confidence oozing out of his ears!

Keep practicing though man it'll all pay off when that year is up! -Happy Hunting Comrades! -Shreder

Think about it like this, if a girl came up to you and said that would'nt you find it abit odd? For got sake dont tell him to kino with the opener, they're finding him weird as it is. Without grabbing her arm and saying 'if you was my little sis'. You got the wording all wrong. You got to make it appear natural. Its no good just stack opinion openers. This first few moments are most important until you reach the hook point. It does'nt strike much of a convo so it needs something else to continue it.

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To effectively communicate, we must realise that we are all different in the way we percieve the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.

OMG why did you bring a thread like this that was posted that long ago?
your trying to answer a guys question who asked it well over a year ago