There is this dual advice thing going on in this community where you are supposed to be aggressive and yet "natural" at the same time. Newbies like myself are very confused; we try to do both at the same time and it ruins our game. Let me give two examples and you'll know what I'm getting at.

One aggressive situation (where I followed the popular modern advice) is when I was on a bus and this attractive woman was sitting there. I immediately man up and directly tell her that she's attractive to me and after chatting, that I'd love to chat with her more. She rejects me nicely. This is a common theme when I do this.

Again, on the bus a different day, I'm about to get on and I see this woman staring at me. I make eye contact and maintain it until she smiles and looks away. Having the first instance in mind, I try a more natural approach. I get on this bus, sit near her and just let the situation develop. She doesn't show any signs anymore and quickly ends up getting off at a stop. The chance was wasted because I didn't jump on it.

I can't micromanage (oh crap, I need to be more natural) and (oh crap, I need to play the numbers game and be aggressive). The modern viewpoint seems to be you need to tailor your approach to the situation but asking a newbie to do this is like asking a solider who has just turned the corner to find an enemy solider to make sure you pull out the right gun for the encounter. The newbie will just end up getting shot trying to decide between his pistol or sniper rifle.

I wish the community would decide the best stance for every general situation and stick with it. If direct is the best, then we just use that. Or whatever. Right now, I've taken a civilian stance on seduction (just live my life and hope something falls into my lap) because learning is too confusing right now when the community can't decide on what they are going with.

Real life interaction is nor black nor white. As such there is no one size fits all approach. There are however general behaviourial rules that apply in order to seduce girls.

My best advice is to read the lounge section for there are at regular basis good in depth posts on seduction and human psychology. Read some commercial material aswell (I've for example also read The game, Rules to the game, Double Your Dating and 60's full manifesto) try to grasp the concepts behind the lines. Make connections between all of these methods.
Analyse what happens around you based on your pick-up books. Work on your social intelligence and thus learn how to behave in different situations.

Excellent advice here. + 1 Well said P-style.

I'd also like to add for the OP. To let your instincts come into play. We are all fined tuned unconsciously to interact with the opposite sex, the less you can let your conscious thoughts interfere and just see it as interacting with another human being rather then seeing it as a potential seduction, the better you will be suited to the interaction. When a man initiates a conversation with a woman, physical interest is pretty much already implied, in these particular situations, it is wise to be indirect. Try to create instant comfort, your body and unconscious gestures will do the rest. Look for signs of interest, if they are sufficient, then become direct with your intentions.

If your time is limited and you have to make it a cold approach, make it a positive experience, you don't always have to go in for the close. Make it positive for the both of you, you never know when you may see this woman again. If you got into her head in a good way, chances are if she see's you again, she will remember you.

Just remember, you are in this for the long haul, it's not always about getting the girl, as much as it is about learning to become a desirable man. Learn from every experience you have, try to take something positive out of every single one.


Good luck.

_________________
Seduce their mind and the rest will follow.

Don't be so beta that you have to let others decide what you will do. The Alpha stance is that you use whatever method works best for you. MM works for some, Natural game works for others. Aggressive works better for some guys, just find your comfort level and go with that. Besides, I don't think it's really valid to dismiss either one on the little interactions you described. Try 100 approaches with aggressive and 100 with natural then come back and report. That's the PUA style. Then you can school US on what works!

Happy Sarging!

The crux of the matter is this...

At your stage, you need to look at every aspect you can, determine what works and what doesn't for YOU. Fuck what other people's methods work for them - do they work for YOU?

Learn from everyone, model what you like, shitcan what you don't. Then go out in the world and TRY it.

Practice, practice, practice.

When you've mastered this enough to have it happen reflexively - it WILL be natural. None of the 'differences' matter. What matters is what works for YOU, and only you can determine that.

Sarge on.

RR.

_________________
Women are like ceramic tile.... if you do the prep work, and lay them properly the first time...you can walk all over them for years to come.

Did you speak to her? I'm not sure if I've just misunderstood what you've posted, but natural doesn't mean sitting near a girl and hoping that something will naturally develop. You've still got to get talking to her, you just do it differently to how you would if you were using canned material (ie; you don't use a canned opener, but use something observational or just go up say hi and have a natural conversation with elements of flirtiness in!)

Lol it's not up to the community to standardize how game should be played ... IT'S UP TO YOU O_O ...

What if the COMMUNITY decide to use chloroform as a standard to pick up girls? Would you do it then O_o?

I don't know what you are doing but, don't give up yet. You are probably doing something wrong after your openers. It seem like your openers are going well, it's just the stuff afterward is what you are doing wrong. Don't give up, learn from your mistakes and improve! Don't blame others of your faults ... blame yourself and fix it.

Cognitive Mastery: An ability to convince/know of what you believe will be useful. You decide that through experience.

Everything is up to you ... you decide your fate :p ...

Listen, if you approach like 1000 girls you'll get better for sure ... don't complain after 100 approaches :p ... if you still suck ... go to a boot camp ^_^ or surround yourself with a mastermind of semi to good players to learn from.

Sincerely,

Donston