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1. I would be inclined to assume she is kind of not really interested in anyone if she is opening up about her ex and her feeling about him towards you. So it's nothing personal to you. Bishes are emotional creatures yet fickle at the same time. One day she will wake up and be instantly over him.
No, shes talking to everyone about her ex because shes in pain, shes not gonna "wake up one day and be over him" it's going to be a time consuming process and you don't want to be associated with her healing nor is that time really the time to try and build sexual tension.
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2. You should just be a listener like her girlfriends would be.
your not her girlfriend and you don't want to be, you want to be a sexual partner and you need to build THAT kind of relationship with her not the kind of relationship she has with her gay bff or her girlfriends, that's how you endup in a LJBF situation.
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3. Really ooze your not interested in her - yet be understanding and patient on what she has to say. She is out of a relationship and is feeling more vulnerable and less wanted (even if she ended it) - her attention detector is running high now. Exploit that - Don't feed it.
this will work only for sex and only if you can hold her in a sexual frame and chances are she'll endup resenting you after her head clears. (she's going to feel guilty about sleeping with someone for the wrong reasons, but hell, not like I haven't done it when I needed to get laid)
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I think if your going to cash in on this stock - it's not going to be for a while/until her wounds heal... so for now.. keep her in your portfolio to cash in later and work on some new girls for the time being.
woman are a lot more like sammiches than stock, fresh they're great, wait to long and they're stale and hard to swallow.
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& if this backfires - she will most likely talk you up to her hot friends on how much of a good/trustworthy & supportive guy you are which should give you female rep points ... which u can use her to get closer to her friends or even use her friends to see if u can spark jealousy from her.
sweet nice guy talk isn't the message you want her to tell her friends, threw her on the bed and fucked her till she was sweating and shaking for hours after is the message you want to her deliver