Quote:
After a couple of hours trying not to drown in the most beautiful eyes ever i realize that i really like her and i'm falling in love. We get along, i even told her some of mine personal secrets and i regret that now.
When we talked about our previous relationships, she told me that her first boyfriend was 40 and she was 15. But i wasn't repulsed by that.
Later that night i try to kiss her and she hesitates. I ask her what's wrong and she says she kinda lives with her boyfriend. Who is, i later find out, 11 years older than her and has 3 times more salary than average.
I'm no expert, but it doesn't take one to see where you're going wrong. These three points are all very bad warning signs.
You are not falling in love with her after a couple of hours. You are feeling needy, clinging attraction. That clinginess ends in despair 100% of the time.
Her first boyfriend was 40 when she was 15. This is illegal, unhealthy, and surely damaged her psyche. You don't want damaged goods, trust me.
She also has a boyfriend that she didn't tell you about. Don't get in the way of long term relationships. She cares more about him than she does you, I'm sure of it. She just wants an attention fix.
Finally, why is your proposed solution the worst possible one? You would retract your sexuality? No true man denies his sexuality. If anything you should refuse to have contact with her, because you can only think of her as sexy but don't want the drama that's coming from that.
She is a bad choice. Realize it. From there, if you make a mistake, it's your own damn fault.