| Hey everyone.
I've never been that great with women, fairly average bloke usually getting with girls who I'm not that keen on or don't find that attractive. Occasionally I luck and and get with an 8 (max) but very rarely. Anyway a few things have been happening in my life recently which have made me decide that I really need to do something about this. I'm going to tell you two stories.
I was chatting to my SPAM (girl) earlier, and she told me about a conversation shed had with her girlfriends. They'd been talking about guys who are their mates. My name had came up, and one of them, a HB 10, had said that I didn't really count as a guy mate, I'm more of a girl really (I'm guessing partly because I live with a lot of girls and partly because of my fairly unthreatening nature.) Anyway, although I'm sure this was all said in jest (and perhaps I was never really meant to find out), it has had quite a profound impact on how I perceive myself.
I've been DJing in this club now for a couple of months and its going pretty well, the promoters seem to like my music and everything which is good. The other week two of my buddys came along and were hanging out in the DJ booth all evening, occasionally having a go. They both dissapear to leave me to it and both end up getting laid while I bearly even get a shred of attention. There both pretty good looking guys, good natural game (success breeding success), so this sort of thing isn't unusual. However the next day I was chatting to one of them and he told me, that the HB he had shagged had opened him saying "he looked good DJing." I never normally get jealous of them, I've sorta just gotten used to it, but that pissed me off! I didn't start to DJ because I thought it would get me women, I just love music, but it's just annoying that my talent gave him the opportunity to get even more tail.
A combination of these things, and others, has lead me to a point where I'm pretty unhappy with the way things are going. I was happy with life, Im 22 year old student (i'd say I was pretty clever), I've got a good set of friends, fairly athletic, good DJ etc. Potentially these things have been in my head masking the fact that im crap with women ... until now.
I've decided that to start with, the main area I need to improve is my conversation and flirting. I feel like when I'm talking to new girls that my brain gets in the way (it's like I'm over thinking things) and the conversation either fizzles out or heads somewhere boring. I don't really have this problem with people I know well (but this is probably why I've ended up with so many girl mates.) I dont want to rush things and think about how I'm going to talk a girl into bed or anything like that, for now I just need to concentrate on leading the conversation somewhere fun and interesting.
I found some great posts/links on here so far but if there's anyone out there who's reading this who has had similar problems and has found anything particularly helpful?
M
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CHAT
