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Me – Junior in college
Girl – Freshman
Competition - Freshman
I am a junior in college. We had a date party coming up for my fraternity and my friend knew a girl who was looking for a date and was apparently interested. I FB and text gamed her and ended up asking her. Our texting pattern was sporadic, like we would send 3-5 messages in long intervals (20min to hours); definitely flirty though. We had a great time at the party, and I got a ton of IOIs. Only annoying thing was there was another guy who was hawking her the whole night (competition). Whenever I stepped away from her while we were dancing (bathroom, say hi to a friend) he would jump in. This was a bit bothersome because I know she has a bit of history with this guy. She would dance with him, but always went back to me when I beckoned her. I ended up taking her back that night. We made out and I fingered her. This was last Saturday.
Next I heard from my friends that she had a great time, liked me etc. So plans were to ask her on a date. I asked her to a movie, but she responded:
“We definitely should but I have a ton of tests this week.” This was true, she was booked with exams. Later, I hinted at studying together, but she said she had to avoid anything social until Friday when she is done with tests. Not a problem, I understand she is busy, but I figured she would be down for the study date.
Lately, I have heard that this other guy has been talking with her and stopping by her room. A brief back story, they were almost dating when he hooked up with another girl and she decided to end things. He also happens to be in the same frat as me. The texting has gotten more sporadic. We used to have approx 8 exchanges a day and now it is around 2-3. Also, it could just be me, but they seem less flirty on her end.
I have heard from friends that she has feelings for me, but there is a lot of “emotion tied up in the unresolved conflict” with this guy other guy. I was hoping to close fast on her to avoid the competition, but it looks like I may have to duke it out.
I’m not sure I want to ask her to hang out again, as I will start to sound needy/desperate. How should I proceed with this? The last communication we had was her responding to me around 11pm (5 hours ago). I think I had texted her 5 hours before that. Her texts were a bit shorter and not flirty like usual.
Does this girl want me to chase her, or should I lay back and try and get her to come to me? I’m afraid if I take it too easy, the other guy, my competition, will win her over and I know he won’t back down. Sorry this is so long, thanks a ton for your help.
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