Feeling good about inner game until you see the ex boyfriend



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PostPosted: Thu Jun 24, 2010 7:04 pm 
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I've been doing pretty good on confidence recently, feeling in shape and all that. Really messed me up after I'd been talking to this girl for a while, seemed like real direct flirting and tons of IOI's and then out of nowhere they say something that totally tips you off to them not being over their ex, and then you find out their ex is something ridiculous. I get the whole idea of "you're the prize blah blah blah". But it's hard to live up to that idea in your mind when you find out the ex is some dude who's 6' 4" and built like Arnold, likes the music they like, and everyone who meets them likes them.

How do you live up to that when you're just like... one step down from them in every way?


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 6:03 am 
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I've been doing pretty good on confidence recently, feeling in shape and all that. Really messed me up after I'd been talking to this girl for a while, seemed like real direct flirting and tons of IOI's and then out of nowhere they say something that totally tips you off to them not being over their ex, and then you find out their ex is something ridiculous. I get the whole idea of "you're the prize blah blah blah". But it's hard to live up to that idea in your mind when you find out the ex is some dude who's 6' 4" and built like Arnold, likes the music they like, and everyone who meets them likes them.

How do you live up to that when you're just like... one step down from them in every way?
He's an ex for a reason


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 7:33 am 
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Great short,sweet & simple point Last Wolf.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 2:19 pm 
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If he broke up with her..?


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 8:02 pm 
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I've been doing pretty good on confidence recently, feeling in shape and all that. Really messed me up after I'd been talking to this girl for a while, seemed like real direct flirting and tons of IOI's and then out of nowhere they say something that totally tips you off to them not being over their ex, and then you find out their ex is something ridiculous. I get the whole idea of "you're the prize blah blah blah". But it's hard to live up to that idea in your mind when you find out the ex is some dude who's 6' 4" and built like Arnold, likes the music they like, and everyone who meets them likes them.

How do you live up to that when you're just like... one step down from them in every way?
By being happy with who you are, and not comparing yourself to others.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 25, 2010 10:13 pm 
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thats a tough one, but just think, she is talking to you for a reason.. so your doing something good.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 26, 2010 4:31 am 
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If he broke up with her..?
who gives a fuck? looks dont matter


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 26, 2010 11:24 pm 
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By being happy with who you are, and not comparing yourself to others.
Exactly.

It's definitely a tough one and I've been there myself but self-doubt gets you nowhere. I still ocassionally get hit by it but the words 'fuck it, whatever' have become my motto. If you can plough through it then you're fine.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:55 pm 
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I take bac Last Wolf's point(lol)when he said that,"he's an ex for a reason".

Well if he'd dumped her,it makes it more tricky.

Perhaps she could be feeling a lot down & insecure aout herself.

So if he,the ex,would reinitiate the chat,she might re-engage it just to validate to herself that she's attractive,despite this guys dumping her.

Or she can be so pissred off by his act of dumping her that she's repulsed by the idea of even seeing the ex.

So it depends on her mental state and what'd happened.

1)Did he dump her[which could've left her seeing him as a dominant man,thus leaving her desiring him more]?

2)Did she dump him?

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 3:33 pm 
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The situation for this particular situation is that he dumped her. I'd been flirting with her for about a week before he broke up with her, without even realizing she'd had a boyfriend. After that, I was emotionally there somewhat, but I think I did pretty good about avoiding ever actually talking about him. It's obvious she still wants him back, but she's ridiculously into me as well.

There's a lot of guys interested in her too, but she doesn't like any of them. She begged the boyfriend to come back to her for a while, but he constantly denied her. I told her to get over him, and I think she for the most part is. The only idea I don't like is getting into a relationship, and him coming back for her, which is totally possible. I don't like the idea of him getting back into the picture and stressing me out in the future.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 27, 2010 3:36 pm 
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I've been doing pretty good on confidence recently, feeling in shape and all that. Really messed me up after I'd been talking to this girl for a while, seemed like real direct flirting and tons of IOI's and then out of nowhere they say something that totally tips you off to them not being over their ex, and then you find out their ex is something ridiculous. I get the whole idea of "you're the prize blah blah blah". But it's hard to live up to that idea in your mind when you find out the ex is some dude who's 6' 4" and built like Arnold, likes the music they like, and everyone who meets them likes them.

How do you live up to that when you're just like... one step down from them in every way?
You need to look at the situation in a different light. You are not one step down from him; you are simply different. Don't worry about the outside world if you have a connection with a girl and she has a connection with you her past hook ups dont matter. Hope this helps. good luck!

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