What Pickup has Become is Hurting Most Guys, IMHO



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PostPosted: Tue Dec 22, 2009 4:36 pm 
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What one theoretically attempts to do is to decrease dependent self esteem in relation to others. You'll never get rid of it, but what most people suffer is an unhealthy level of dependent self esteem. Its not evil, its just the amount that exists in most people is not beneficial.
Well let's just throw this out there.

The reason so many people suffer from unhealthy levels of dependent self esteem is that they SUCK compared to others. They know it, we know it (if they post a few words on this forum) and the entire World they live in knows it.

And the reason why so many continue to suffer from low self esteem is they they don't even ATTEMPT to "un-suck" themselves. Instead, they spend all night long screaming in the mirror, LYING to themselves that "Oh, my kindergarten teacher is right. I am special. . . .I know I am, I know I am, I know I am . . " This of course doesn't achieve anything. So they come here and lie to us, thinking that some rapport from complete strangers might help their case, "I am an aaawesome PUA! I pick up girls left and right. I have my techniques. Do you want to hear the "cube" or not? Baaaam! . . . ehm . . . so what do you guys think?"

Do you kids realize how terribly pathetic this is? Just in the last month there seems to be a whole new brigade of level ZERO "pua's" in here just spewing bullshit and patting themselves and each other on the backs. Guys . . . why do you even bother? What's the point?

Here's the cycle. See if this applies to you:

1. You kids lack self esteem.
2. So you can't take ANY criticism what so ever because "ohhhh, it hurts your little pride".
3. So you defend your little heart by lashing out with lies, "No . . . I am the best. My cube technique is the best . . .I know I got game!"
4. You go out and show off your total SUCKINESS to the World and they laugh at your face.
5. You suffer another little dent in your thin-walled self esteem.
5. Hey! Let's go back to #1 on the list and do this again!

Grab some balls. Sucking is NOT an identity. Sucking is merely blip in time. The very moment you BEGIN TO Un-SUCK yourself, you are already NOT SUCKING but rather SUCCEEDING. Do you get it? The moment you grab a pen and write down on a little plan: 1. Smile. 2. Say hello to everybody I meet. (you are already SUCCEEDING)

The moment you admit to yourself, "Shit, What I did the last 5 times must NOT be the right way to go because it's not working," You are already succeeding. How can any of you sit there, pull out the violin with your melodramatic stories of failure, and then tell us, "I rock . . . I did everything right." How can you sit there and tell us these stories of total SUCKDOM and then in the same paragraph tell us, "well, it's probably just the girl. I'm sure it'll work on other girls. . . "
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NOT GIVING A FUCK WHAT ANYONE THINKS ABOUT YOU
This too needs to be EARNED and holy shit, it's soooooo easy if you'd just give it a chance.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 22, 2009 5:57 pm 
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Well if you start living up to the points in this thread, then your becoming a Bastard PUA which i just wrote a article about.

I agree with Jav 200%, he knows it, i can share that with all you guys here.

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True communication is communion―the realization of oneness, which is love! ~ Eckhart Tolle


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 25, 2009 8:22 pm 
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Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better. --Samuel Beckett


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 27, 2009 9:18 am 
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Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better. --Samuel Beckett
Nothing like a barely relevant quote from someone else...

The problem with PUA isn't what it teaches, it's who it's being taught to. Who is it most appealing to? When you look around the forum, who's asking and who's answering? What's being asked?

I gotta be honest, PUA seems genuinely appealing to kids and douchebags. And when they get together and learn something, boy or boy are they too stupid to learn from it...

PUA is summed up as social skills, confidence. I read a few books, heard a few tapes, I have absolutely no need or desire to go to the bootcamp thing, I'm fine. I think the whole thing could be summed up as social skills, and confidence.

But if you don't see the big picture, if you don't try to understand why things work, and instead just try and understand how, you end up not understanding anything.

It does say to not care about other people's opinions of you, and it does say to have this immaculate confidence so it can dribble out into how you act. If a group of people don't care to know WHY you do that, you end up with a group of cocky jackasses or idiots looking like a walking Hot Topic with their attempts at peacocking. I have to be honest, I think Mystery looks pretty stupid in most of the things he wears. But that's him, it works for him, he likes it, it's cool. I wouldn't wear it.

I see all these threads on here asking about their high school relationships, and all these threads asking if their clothing is peacock-ish enough...PUA isn't a problem, it's who's learning it and how.

I for instance wasn't interested in PUA specifically, I liked evolutionary psychology first (psych in general is interesting to me) and I found this. An important key in psychology is "why".

I'm pretty sure this isn't how most people found PUA, I'm going to guess guys who can't get laid, get so desperate to get laid, they find PUA as a means to get laid. And that is a group of people who don't care "why" anything works. And that means that group doesn't understand PUA, and that leads to the idiots who take things to an extreme because they can't observe why things work or don't work, so they ask specific questions as to HOW to get things to work.

PUA would be beneficial if it appealed to the right audience.

Side notes on a few specific posts...not giving a fuck about what anyone thinks of you can easily be the mindset of a murderer or rapist (after all, why should they care? If they can avoid consequences, they shouldn't care). I don't think that not caring what everyone thinks about you is a goal. I think it's good to keep you being you, but if you stink, and have nasty breath and look like crap, and you don't care...that's fine, let's just hope you don't care if anyone gets near you or not.

And common sense is common, it's in the name. If it's not common, it's not common sense. But since some people don't learn why, there's nothing they can apply common sense to...after all, they only know how, not why.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 04, 2010 5:01 am 
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Some of this stuff cracks me up. AFC's and others looking for advice make the mistake of assuming everything is back or white.

Let's go back to our AFC days for a second. Think of that natural, the one who always hooked up with the HB. Now picture him at a party, in a bar etc

Let me guess. He's got a group of people around him. He's telling a story and making people laugh. He might even have teased or made fun of the hot one for something dumb.

The hot girl just asked him to buy her a drink, and he has some smartass comment for her...but doesn't buy her the drink. It seems like he has a backbone, and won't be walked over by this girl.

------------------------------------

Flash back to now. I'll give you a hint. Having that group around you, making people laugh- this shouldn't be an act. You need to have the personality. You want the group to fall in love with you. This can not happen if you're a complete tool or DBag. Sure you can get lucky, but you'll never maintain any kind of relationship (including ten night stands) if you have to try to hide your dbag status from everyone you meet.

Food for thought: Attraction = trust + comfort.

Work at becoming truly trustworthy. Work at being a good person, who all enjoy the company of. I promise (cross my heart) you'll get better results this way.

Long story short- stop being an asshole! The asshole part comes into the game when the girl thinks to herself "who is this guy making fun of me in front of all my friends...they're all laughing at me" Not "who's this guy that's treating me and my friends like a dick"


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 04, 2010 6:04 am 
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This threads deep


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 17, 2010 2:10 am 
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When you pay someone for advice, and that person is helpoing you get laid, you are not going to fill good about yourself.
Your ego can only make you feel bad about yourself if your ego is your adviser. If you can drop your ego and have someone help you work on something you recognize as a problem in your life, then why should you feel bad about it?

Paying someone money for advice is not going to get you laid. Only YOU can get you laid.

Stop hating. The first part of recovering is admitting you are an AFC. Almost all PUAs know what it's like to be one.

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ITS YOUR CHOICE!
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