Thank you guys for the encouragement and the help.
...I thought my oneitis is over but..........
I still feel stuff for this girl Victoria......
I started to actually "game" her FOR THE FIRST TIME after knowing her for several weeks. It didn't work. No IOIs. Just the usual, when we left school, she gave me a hug. That's it....
Back then, not only did I wanna POSSESS this girl and make her do what I wish, I really felt genuine love towards her. Both of those emotions, the evil possessive side and the true love side existed in my fucking mind. Their combinations hurt. I was crying the entire weekends, calling my friends for their sympathies and advice...
...For a while, it's as if the "dark side" disappeared, and I just kinda felt as if I just wanted her to be happy, and let her have a good life and I'll just move on...... As much as I felt satisfaction for feeling that way, I felt sad, and felt as if I lost something very precious..... It was okay. I prayed... Prayed to God that he will let her have a good life...
After that....... this icky-inlove-sweet feeling seems to start dissipating, while my dark side is starting to come back... but.......
.......
I still love Victoria... If I had the power to seduce her and have her suck my cock, I wouldn't do it. It's too much. I just want her to be happy...
...which is why I will be gaming other girls.
Let my journey..... BEGIN!!!!!
This thread will have lots of my lay updates. I'll buy Neil Strauss's book The Game, and Mr. L. Rx's book Dating to Relating A to Z.
We'll see what happens.
May God forgive my soul and give me another chance...