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So far I plan on using Ross Jeffries response:
I don't promise any such thing. Friends don't put each other into boxes like that. The only thing I'll promise is never to do anything unless you and I both feel totally comfortable, willing, and ready"
^ This is good but demonstrating this frame through your actions is better. By "saying" the above, you too are putting her in a box of sorts. I'm betting she's a bit scared of diving into another "relationship" directly after breaking up from another. Demonstrate that you're no passing flake and remain strong in spite of her withholding the vagina and she'll be back in no time. Especially if you combine it with:
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if youre out at a party and shes there, speak to other girls, yes make her jealous without making it seem too obvious.
But, speak to other girls because you WANT to speak to other girls. The end result might seem to be the same to us but girls are incredibly perceptive. If you demonstrate to her that she needs to "catch" you in a hurry because you're in high demand, she will . . .