When Should "You" Call?



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When should you call
Next day  12%  [ 5 ]
2-3 days  31%  [ 13 ]
Week  0%  [ 0 ]
None of the above  10%  [ 4 ]
Stop thinking so much :)  48%  [ 20 ]
Total votes : 42
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 Post subject: When Should "You" Call?
PostPosted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:33 am 
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I never know when is the right time to call a girl whose number I got recently. Should it be the next day, day after, day after that, etc etc.

I just read an article on this subject that seems logical http://social-masters.com/blog/when-should-you-call

It would be cool though to get some more opinions on this subject

Many thx

.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 3:38 am 
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Text her later that night. Wish her a good nite or whatever.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 12:02 pm 
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Text later in the night, and the next day then probably call 2-3days later. Or call her the next day aswell depending on how it's going.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 12:39 pm 
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I usually text them the morning after then the day before I plan to do something

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:24 pm 
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You need to get into a routine that works for you. Try calling different times for different girls, some want you to call and some use it as a test. I would text the night of to keep tension down and not have to get into a real conversation. Use something dumb like you were just making sure it was her number because often times the most beautiful girls skip out on you. You can probably fall back on that the next time you do call her. I'd wait at least two days if she doesn't call you back and see what she's been up to.

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PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2009 3:15 pm 
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Cheers for the response guys.

I like the idea of texting the same night as it would make them feel like they know you better than they do. I think personally, from now on, I am going to ring the next day just so I can get it over and done with :D

Its good to see majority of people voting for 'don't think so much'. Maybe I just need to not give a shit. Just let it happen naturally. Something to work on me thinks.


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PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2009 6:05 pm 
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Ok, so I read the article and although I agree that that style of approach can work fine, I think the phone is the way to go and not texting first thing. This guy says that girls will respond to a text before they'll pick up the phone, but that hasn't been my experience at all, it's usually the other way around.

I suggest following some guidelines a guy I hung out with for a while explained to me. He said that you base when you call back, upon the level of connection you made. The stronger the connection, the longer you can wait before calling, but you don't have to wait. If you didn't have a great connection with her, then she'll forget you sooner, so you don't want to wait too long to call, so maybe call her in 2 days, or if you were future tensing with her and talked about something that was happening the next day, then you have a good reason to call her the next day. The funny thing though, is that if you've got a great connection, she won't be creeped out that you call her sooner, because she will want to hear from you, she just won't forget you as quickly as the girl you don't have a great connection with.

Also, I highly suggest using the phone first and so do most guys I know. Texts are easy not to open up and spend the effort reading, but a phone ringing is annoying and most people will answer it out of habit. If she doesn't answer, then wait a couple days and send her a text or try calling her again.


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PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2009 7:25 pm 
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Agree with Rye Lee ^^.

The only thing I would add is something I do as standard now. And that is that if you know you haven't definately got it in the bag, then text her right after leaving her. This text is not intended to spark a productive conversation; it's just fractionating her for future phone contact whilst taking advantage of the BT she still has - after all, next time you call/text her, there's no controlling for what kind of mood she's in or who's just dropped their pizza over her new dress.

After that text, if she replies then either freeze her out or write a text that ends the conversation. Then proceed as usual with regards to calling and not texting.

This was one of my biggest sticking points especially with daygame, and this is how I have sorted it out.

The main main main main main thing though, is that it's not really about the phone. Simply put, the time you have previously spent with her is a much greater determinant of how she will respond to you over the phone (if at all). So play solid game. I used to do a lot of 5-10min #-closes during the day when escalation isn't so plausible, but that's just dumb. Big deal, so you got a number in 10 mins. Well done Einstein. Is she gonna respond when you call? Hell no! Who the fuck are you? She only talked to you for a few mins! So play solid game.

Finally, set up the day 2 before you leave with the phone number. In my opinion you should play the game as if phones did not exist. That will increase your day 2 rate many-fold.

Oh and one more thing. Don't end the convo once you've got the number. Stick around a bit longer. I have found it reduces the creep factor and increases the chance of responding and good responding to your phone game.


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PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2009 7:36 pm 
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Further to my post above, I have another interesting notion to add.

If you don't play solid game and get the number, fine. She could have been laughing, both of you could have had a mutually good time.

-BUT-



Next time you call/text, she treats you like a FUCKING CREEP, or a rapist or something. Ok, it's not usually that bad, but I have had that bad before (although that may have been subject to my experimentation with GM style over text).

Why?

Because of BACKWARD RATIONALISATION. The advanced PUAs leave CLUES behind for the girl to backward rationalise favourably. She could have LOVED you for that 15 mins it took you to get her number, but hate you afterwards. Because her bitch responses take over on autopilot and calculate: 'Talked for 15 mins + can't remember name + omg he randomly came up and talked to me + I don't know what's his job = he must be a creep = BITCH ALARM NEEE NAWW NEEE NAWW NEE NAWW'.

So, make sure you get across some bland details such as your occupation, your FULL name, where you're from etc. This will give the illusion later on that enables her to respond favourably to you.

Once you get that down you can start tying in the mystery element etc, but being a mystery is a lot different than being an unknown freak. (Not the PUA Mystery.)[/u]


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PostPosted: Sun May 03, 2009 8:21 am 
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I just had an interesting thought.

I would say the question of whether to text or call really depends on the age of the woman you are sarging. If she's 18-23 texting is the better first thing to do. If you call right away she could panic and think "Oh my god this guy is calling me and he wants a relationship! He's gonna be clingy! Shit!" It just catches her off guard in an unfavorable way, and she's more likely to ignore it.

If she is older than that, then i agree with Rye completely. A 30yr old woman probably would find a text more of a hassle to deal with than a phone call. I think it's just a reflection of generational differences (i'm trying not to be too analytical though).

That said, I would just text her the next day in the afternoon or something ( Don't text her right when you wake up. It's creepy)

I like using texts and opening with no content and only a verb. Something like this:

Me: Kick
Her: What?
Me: I just kicked you. Ohh!! i just kicked you.
Her: Owww. why'd you do that for?
Me: I have this problem where I kick women that think i'm good looking. It's all your fault.

etc etc.... then have a normal convo.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun May 03, 2009 10:09 am 
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Text her first either the same night of metting or the day after and then every other day, Phone when you want to do something or arrange a meet up so your the man and not a woss.

Your not aiming to have a conversation with text message, you want be firstly, keeping attraction, connection and getting her to think about you.

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PostPosted: Sun May 03, 2009 3:43 pm 
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Quote:
Text her first either the same night of metting or the day after and then every other day, Phone when you want to do something or arrange a meet up so your the man and not a woss.

Your not aiming to have a conversation with text message, you want be firstly, keeping attraction, connection and getting her to think about you.
I agree with most what you said except calling her to arrange a meet and you shouldnt feel like you need to wait every other day, arrange the meeting over text, only call after she's accepted the date and you need to confirm she's on her way 30mins or so prior to the meet up.

Most girls won't answer the phone when you call. For a variety of reasons she may be with her boyfriend(whom she's kept secret from you), or she never planned on meeting you to begin with because she's not interested. Maybe she's busy at the moment. What if her voice mail is full which prevents you from leaving that awkard voice message. Or what if you do leave a message and she doesn't call you back ever. All these things leave you in a confused state of mind of, "Do i call her back?"(side note: never call her back).

Texting gives you time to think about what you want to say and gives her time to respond and also texting can be done in silence.

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PostPosted: Mon May 04, 2009 5:12 am 
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Ok, the reasoning I have is not based upon older women. Younger women may text more when you actually know them, but if they just met you randomly at a bar, it is a lot easier and more likely for them to ignore a text message from you, than it is to ignore a phone call. Texting back takes effort, so if they aren't as enthusiastic as they were, they probably won't bother. Talking isn't hard and it gives you the chance to get a read off of her and pump her enthusiasm up because you can tell how she's reacting to things, so you know whether your jokes are hitting or not.

For first contact, calling >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> texting.


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PostPosted: Mon May 04, 2009 2:52 pm 
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call/text when you have something to say and a day 2 in mind.

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PostPosted: Mon May 04, 2009 6:08 pm 
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Depends on the situation . . . If you get her number during the day, she's more likely to remember you and waiting a day or two is fine.

At a club, if a girl gives you her number, you can bet she's given out her number to several guys and it makes sense to be quicker on the draw.

Either way, I've been having lots of fun with the "immediate text" to set up future contacts.

Directly after getting her number, within a few minutes . . . something like:

Kasabi: Ms Cupcakes, (pastry chef) OK, I admit it. I guess I was staring at your tits just a little. (If this conversation took place earlier) Kasabi

This accomplishes a few things. 1. Even if she doesn't text back right away, she'll save your name+number on her phone. Next time you contact her, she'll know it's you right away. 2. Even girls are afraid of the flake. She'll know that she wasn't just another "number" to you. 3. Every time she checks her phone for the next few texts, she will be reminded of the "fun meeting" with you.

4. . . . Setting up a sure shot phone conversation can be done with a simple text next time around. Now that you know she's got your name+number on her phone, you don't need to re-introduce yourself any more. Instead of texting: "Nice meeting you, blah, blah, blah . . . this is Kasabi" . . . You can instead, "Woh Ms. Cupcakes, 30% sale on Belgium chocolates!"

Very tough for girls to NOT respond in some form to somewhat random texts. They're curious creatures.

She might text back: "???" or "Are you crazy?" or "Ha ha ha" or "Where?" It doesn't matter . . . because now you know she's with her phone. And it's only proper etiquette to answer the phone. There can be no planned aloofness or playing hard to get. So it doesn't matter how she replies. You call her back right away with something like, "Oops sorry . . . I read that wrong. It's a 30 a day sale on Belgium ceiling fans. Are you a fan of ceiling fans by an chance? Hey, that was a wild night on ......"


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