| Here's a question I haven't seen addressed on here or in any books or newletters...what's your percentages on the bullets below, where did you start and where are you now? Presumably, as we become better at this, the percentages get better (if not, we're definitely doing something wrong, right?)
- Opening
- Creating a connection/attraction successfully once you've opened
- Getting a successful number close
- Getting a successful kiss close
- Getting a successful call back
- Getting a successful date
- Getting a successful f-close
Here's my stats, considering that I'm sort of just getting started:
- Opening: in terms of just opening, I'm getting better at this. I'm not to the "open anyone anytime anywhere" goal yet, but this is entirely under my control. I've gotten much better at this walking up and flirting/teasing, still working on it. I'm probably hitting 50%, but again it's completely under my control as to whether I open or not...it's entirely up to me to make that 100%. Opening 100% will bump all the other percentages...I need to just not even give a shit and just do it.
- Creating connection/attraction: I'm thinking I'm hitting maybe 20% or so here. I'm probably not talking enough...I think maybe I'm ejecting from a set too early too. Gotta put some more effort into this. What I'm discovering that seems to work well for me personally is bouncing in and out of the set a few times. Hmm...I haven't seen that mentioned much. I've got to put some "inner game" work into this...after I know someone, I can talk all afternoon and it comes easily to me to build a connection with a woman after I've gotten to know her a bit. I'm not sure exactly what I'm missing here...I should be *great* at this part and sometimes I am...I've got to observe myself and what it is that is going wrong in those cases where the connection doesn't just take off. (Am I reading her body language wrong? Am I missing her cues? I really think I might be giving up too easily and ejecting from the set too soon. Gotta think on this one.)
- Number close: I'm doing pretty well there...when I feel like the comfort level is good enough that I can ask for a number and get it, I ask. I think I'm actually hitting 90%+ there, I believe. I can't think of maybe 1-2 cases (out of 10 or so) where I've asked for a number but didn't get it.
- Kiss close: I'm not attempting kiss closes nearly enough...I'm only hitting maybe 5% of the opens, but it's because I'm not attempting. I know I need to work more toward gradually escalating and work up to a kiss close. I've got to be braver/not give a shit more on my part! If I just try, I'll probably push the percentage much higher.
- Getting a call back: I'm not doing well there (maybe 10% or so), and it's probably because I'm not building connection well enough AND not attempting more kiss closes. I have to admit though that some of the ladies I've met and collected a number from I've reconsidered the next day and said "Hmmm...she wasn't that cute, I'm not sure I could see taking her on a date". I probably should call more of those, if for nothing else other than practice, eh? I'm not just looking for a lay (but then I'm not looking for anything serious at this point either)...my standards are pretty high, so perhaps I should relax them just a bit to gain some pre-selection value...thoughts? I can't see wasting much time with someone I wouldn't really be interested in dating, even if I did get a lay or two out of it. I'd rather put that time toward finding and meeting those ladies that I really like. Personal preference I guess.
- Getting a successful date: Not high enough yet...but as mentioned above, some of the ladies I've met don't seem so cute the next day. And it's not so much that they lack phsyical attractiveness (I don't approach any woman I think is unappealing)...they lack an interesting personality or have lots of baggage (not something I need or want to deal with at the moment...I've had 13 years of baggage handling, don't need any more.) I am a bit picky. I'd rather slowly accumulate a few really good girlfriends than to quickly accumulate a bunch of psychos and drama queens, to put it bluntly.
- Getting a successful f-close: Not high enough yet...but again, I'm not that interested in banging someone just for a bang. But then...maybe I should ask myself this: why not? Hmm. There's nothing wrong with getting laid if the woman is all for it too. Maybe I need to examine my "inner game" here a bit. Does getting laid more (even with women I wouldn't choose to date) make me MORE or LESS appealing to women who are attractive to me on all terms? This seems like a good question...the answer is probably "more attractive", correct or no? Assuming yes, I probably should capitalize on more opportunities.
Ya know, I think the fact that my percentages are so scattered probably tells me something (or at least confirms it): I lack consistency. Practice makes perfect however...
Gruuve _________________ Divorced dude having a good life.
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