Lately comments made towards me have really been bothering me, it feels that people don't see me as a classy individual. Apparently people see me as a bit of a greaser but I keep my appearances fairly good(Clean shave, clean haircut, fairly decent clothes(Right now times have been a little tight for cash since Im between jobs) I'm driving some 80 something truck until I can find myself something newer than my old restored beetles. I feel like a total greaseball and chicks obviously don't like greaseballs(Unless they do?) Im not straight edge or anything, I smoke pot from time to time but I don't think its major stoner levels.

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I just wanna fuck bad bitches, for all the nights I never had bitches.

It could be something simple like how you convey yourself to women, do you get drunk whilst you are out? also it could be who you hang around with.

what comments have you had from women?

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think about how you convey your emotions and intentions to other people. take your energy levels into consideration and look at your life frm an outsiders perspective. wht do you do rong?

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V1V

Your avatar demonstrates that you lack class. Most young boys are void of class. That is the reason that girls all want older more mature men.

Most of the boys on here need to quit acting so damn horny. My God, take a cold shower. Read a good book. Find a hobby. Nobody likes a desperate man.

I would agree with the poster who said look at who you hang around with. Dump them. It is healthy to dump your friends and find new ones that will cause you to grow as a person. Friends are rarely as important as you think.

Dude seriously, what?! I could point out all the wrong things jam packed into your post, but I'm going to take the high road...

I usually advocate against masturbation, but I think in your case rubbing one out may take the edge off. Or go smoke some pot.

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Thanks for proving my point. I wasn't taking a cheap shot at him or anyone. He wanted people's opinions. I gave him mine. If you don't want the truth you should go ask your mommy for advice. The mods on this board should take a look at those who simply bash others without providing constructive points of advice. I provided mine.

Smoking pot and masturbation is what breeds insecurity. This all leads to a lack of class. Do you think girls get turned on by desperate boys? Boys who hit on everything that moves? No, they don't. Act as if you are in control and have a life beyond the female body. Better yet, create a life beyond getting some. Once you do that you will see how easy it is to get girls.

Ex_pat_of_love,

I gotta agree with nearly everything you wrote. But it's more than just his avatar. . .
Really? Words bother you?

Do you keep your appearances "fairly good"? Really? Why not Keep yourself as well as you can? Why not GREAT clothes instead of "fairly decent" clothes?

All it took was one little post to convey to at least 2 members here that you're an insecure, ill confident, self conscious bum. What makes you think you'll do better in real life? Stop wasting money on weed and spend some money on some REAL clothes. Go out and get yourself a job. Write down some goals. Tape em' up to your wall. Write down a schedule of tasks you'll need to execute to achieve those goals. Get yourself a dry marker scheduler and put it up on your wall. Write everything down . . . get on the ball.

You're like a bum who's asking for advice on silverware for a dining room he doesn't have. Take this seriously. Perception is more important than the truth. The very first moment you tell yourself that you NEED to make some positive changes and the very first moment you make your first positive change, you'll feel better, more confident, and people will take notice right away. Or you can just ask people, "Hey . . . stop calling me a grease ball, OK?" Up to you.

I'm gonna ask my mommy why "friends are rarely as important as you think", or why "most young boys are void of class", or how delusional someone would have to be to think that guys on a pickup site shouldn't be in it to learn how to pick up women and have sex with them.

Here's a tip: Guys rarely come to this site with the intention of bettering themselves, they come with the intention of becoming good with women. But if they are lucky, they find out some things about themselves while they're at it, and become happier human beings as a result. And you know what? There's absolutely nothing wrong with this. There's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be better with women, from meet-up to f-close.

Just because you sound like you know what you are talking about doesn't mean you do. Take it from someone who was in that boat a year ago. You are judging people based on their forum avatars, you are making illogical arguments like "insecurity leads to lack of class". Really? Because I find that having some insecurities is healthy and keeps you in touch with reality. I had no idea having human qualities equates to not having class.

Finally, there's no indication the OP is one of the "boys who hit on everything that moves" but that seems to be the go-to motto in your rhetoric. Your brownie man seems to buy into it, and I'm not at all surprised he misquoted the OP. Please throw some more veiled hints that this thread should be moderated, because from what I can see you're rolling shit in yellow tin foil and expecting to pass it off as nuggets of golden wisdom.

I could go on but by now you've probably stopped reading to start a rant about how wrong I am, or how I'm a young boy devoid of class. I probably am you know, so you should take the high road and not respond to this.

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Roads . . . not sure why YOU are being so defensive for a guy who wrote in his own words, "I FEE LIKE SUCH A GREASE BALL."

What the hell kind of advice do you have for this guy? . . . Because I'd love to hear what you'd have to say. How have you correctly interpreted his post? Can you shed some light to how you think he can get out his "grease ball rut"?

look, If you feel like you're a grease ball, and you think you have "fairly" decent grooming and you have "fairly" decent clothes and you have some money problems but you smoke weed, you gotta fucking man up. Forget the women. Forget combing your hair a little tighter or using better gel. This isn't time for band-aid fixes through cute verbal remarks at people who think "he's a grease ball".

Roads, do you think everybody in the OP's life are misinterpreting him? And let's just say for the sake of the argument that they are totally misinterpreting our op? What the hell can the OP do about this? Would you go and tell those people, "I feel like a grease ball but I don't want you to think I am?"

We're all here to improve ourselves and it seems to me that the OP has several places where he can improve. Nogame, had you thought your appearance was GREAT, that's what you would have written. Instead, you went with "fairly decent". Dude, "fairly decent" SUCKS!!! Crack whores look "fairly decent" with some make up and false teeth. How much more effort will it take you to go from "fairly decent" to great? 10 more minutes in the shower? Buying some decent cologne instead of that bag of weed? Do you see where I am going with this? How much more effort will it take to dress yourself GREAT instead of "fairly decent"? Taking some time to go to some thrift shops? Really putting time and effort to make yourself look REALLY GREAT? . . . is this such a bad thing?

And instead of wasting energy and focusing on those "mean girlies" who think you're a grease ball, how about just focusing on getting a great job. Just get out there. You're trying to fight fire with fire. They're calling you a grease ball. In my opinion and I bet if you mediate on this carefully, you'd agree that you probably have some grease ball tendencies. A "grease ball" isn't WHO YOU ARE . . . it's simply what you've probably been doing lately. Take one initiative to better yourself and I promise you, everybody will take notice.

Now what happens when you show up looking GREAT, feeling GREAT, smelling like some latest hot cologne instead of the stench of weed. . . and with a great new job? Picture yourself like this. Close your eyes and really imagine it. . . Do you see a "grease ball"? Can you imagine anybody even uttering those words at this "new" guy?

This is my point.

In all honesty I think your advice, aside from the blatant misquotation, is pretty good kasabi. No I don't smoke pot. No, I don't think people are misinterpreting the OP's attitude and appearance.

However I do feel a need to defend forum members from bad advice, especially when I sense that they are in a particularly vulnerable state of mind. Standing on a soapbox in front of him preaching him the virtues of reading books and telling him nobody likes a desperate man is just plain wrong. That's not picking him up, that's kicking him while he's down.

This guy does not need to be told to go take a cold shower. If anything, I would suggest he get checked out by a psychiatrist for depression. The OP admits he regularly smokes pot and that may cover up the symptoms of depression, and judging from a few of his old posts I would say this is more than just a rut that we can pick him out of with words.

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So last night I spent time these 2 chicks and my 1 best bud and it got me thinking. These chicks were skanky, and thats no understatement. Are these the people Im going to hang out with the rest of my life? Im going places, are my friends? Are these girls even worth a second glance? Are these the girls Im going to get all my life?

Alright those responses were good food for thought, not as much as Id like but it will do. Alright looks like Ill need to shape up the wardrobe, Im going with my personal stylist(My sister) to the mall to go pick a new wardrobe out. Looks like Ill be cutting out the pot for awhile man, I need to get my shit together and its not really helping. Cutting the stimulants(caffeine, etc) way back as I intake far too much and its not really helping with my problems and my mind. I need to get rid of my ride asap since a broke ass truck doesn't convey class to anyone. I realize things need to change and they need to change asap.

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I just wanna fuck bad bitches, for all the nights I never had bitches.

awesome I'm glad some good came of this mudslinging match lol and keep us up to date on how things go

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While class can be portrayed in your physical appearance, it all starts from within. To be portrayed as high value and classy, you have to believe you are---and you flat out said you did not believe you are. If you want to change, the major difference between classy/unclassy individuals is not how they dress, but how they treat others. A classy individual does not get in pointless arguments about picky things, they treat others as equals, they don't throw fits but speak up when need be and present their argument in an adult manner.

If I see two guys at a bar and one is yelling because the other guy spilled his beer (even though he didn't) the unclassy thing to do would to argue back. The classy thing to do would to just apologize saying you didn't realize you did and buy him a new one...sound AFC? Think you are being AMOGed? No you aren't because everyone else around you will see that you were the rational one and demonstrated class while the other guy is just a fool.

I have never been a fan of pot or of people that smoke pot. Everyone will have their arguments of why it is "okay" to smoke it but it really doesn't display class or high value. People do stupid things when they are high (and drunk to be fair) and the more you are in control of your actions, the more you can demonstrate your class. Class isn't about receiving respect from others about your demeanor...rather it is about treating others with respect (regardless if they are respecting you back). But you don't act classy just because you want to receive respect, you act classy because you know it is the right way to act and that in turn will earn respect.

Were you a psych major?

Anyhow, this is one of the best piece of advice I've seen on this forum lately. Why? Other than some mediating yogi gurus or some zen buddhist monks or whatever, many of us have problems changing the way we think. If we're sad, we can't just "think our way out of it". If we think we're this way or that, it's not easy to just change our thought patterns.

We can however easily change the way we speak. All it takes is a 5 second delay. If you know that it's "classier" to communicate your thoughts a certain way but you've habitually reacted in other ways. Just shut up and wait 5 seconds. Don't let the habitual cycle continue. Wait . . . wait . . . wait . . . then speak clearly in a "classy manner" that you know is the better way to communicate with others. The thing that happens when you do this is that people begin to treat you differently. You don't even have to think about it as a personal transformation will be natural and you will begin to create a new habitual cycle of "classiness". Then your 5 second delay becomes 3 . . 2. . . then bam! No more delay. You're new classy self becomes the real you.

These are the basic thoughts I had in mind when I recommended a new wardrobe and finding a great new job. This is even easier to accomplish than changing your interaction with others because it's one dimensional. Even little kids are less likely to play rough when you put them in pretty little dresses and suits. Just put on a suit with a tie and walk around outside. This simple "physical change" goes a long way in changing the way you feel about yourself. And when you feel a little more classy, it's much easier to treat others with class and here we go again with that classy cycle . . .

Classy people treat others better for sure . . . but they treat themselves better than non classy people.(I am convinced of this) Looking great, feeling great, and walking with your head up because you're proud of your life and outlook. . . it's gotta start somewhere and in my opinion, the best way to begin is also the easiest. Just treat yourself.

Yes sir, I was