ok so update on what happened:
i backed off a bit, sent her one txt yesterday asking if she wanted to go on an adventure....haha it really wasnt as corny as it sounds, probably more situational humor....i dont think i would normally start a convo with a girl saying do you want to go on an adventure...anyhow so heres what happened lastnight after she said yes
she txts me around 10 and asks if im coming over. i txt her back and tell her to call me. she does and tells me she is at her place with a friend and her boyfriend and they are drinking and watching tv, she invites me to come over. i tell her i will come at some point probably. i sit down in my room and play some ocarina of time for an hour or so and then walk over there. i go in and see them. boyfriend is there, she hasnt told him anything at this point. i stay for like 5 min and then ask if they want to go out to the bar. the bf says he has to stay in to study. she repeatedly asks him if he wants to go, he keeps saying no. i invite him to come as well but he keeps insisting that he has to go study. they kind of awkwardly sit there looking at each other while i stand waiting so i am like
"hey, i have to go meet my friend, he is waiting for me there, if you want to carpool now is the time to make your decision"
so she says she is coming and then we leave. it is about 12:40 when we get to the bar. at bar my friend is winging for me and we steadily escalate kino at bar and flirt and joke that sort of thing. after a couple drinks i decide im going to try to kiss her again. great success! i make out with her several times at the bar. my friend informs me that we should go to a hot tub and hang out and then he will leave. i say sounds good, but he has to present the idea. he does. we leave the bar and go to hot tub. i end up getting her completely naked in sauna and finger her. my friend left. i am really hot at this point because we have been fooling around in a sauna for about an hour so i tell her we have to go take a shower. we go do that also naked....anyhow at the end of the night she comes back to my place. we make out for awhile and i get her naked and then put her hands on my boxers so that she will take them off for me. she does and shortly there after we end up having sex....
short lived

because she says my name in a sort of guilty pleading fashion so i ask if she wants to stop. she says yes and i back off and lay down next to her. we make out some more and talk about what is going on with the boyfriend. she keeps telling me throughout the night that she really really likes me, and keeps asking me not to hurt her. Now i have pretty much the entire night been telling her she needs to go ahead and actually break up with him and quit backing down because he is upset. i told her she isnt doing him any favors by drawing it out....that sort of thing...so just let it be known that i brought it up several times that she needed to end things with him and give us a shot. in the morning i walk her back to her place and make out with her one last time at her door before leaving. she watches me walk away down the street before going inside. this is at about 7:40am.
so at this point i am thinking its probably about time for a victory dance. wrong.
i get a txt at about 4:40pm same day saying:
"so, i told my boyfriend what happened. i dont know how we got here but i cant do it-im sorry-dont hate me."
i tried calling her back but she must have immediately turned her phone off.
does anyone have any perspective on this? any suggestions?