Should I text her or let it go



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PostPosted: Sat Mar 12, 2016 6:55 pm 
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Ok so funny story today... Went to check out a criterium race this morning to take notes as it's racing season again and I'm jumping into gear. While at the race watching from the side lines the women's field was racing and I happen to see a girl I had a fling with a couple summers ago racing. I met her before I took off on an extended trip. We went on a few dates and I slept with her. Unfortunately I was moving to California for two years so I had to leave her.

Today when I saw her racing I was blown away. She was just as hot as when I first met her. I was thinking wether or not to approach her after she finished. I ended up doing it and said "Hey! So did you win?" She said no not noticing me with my huge Oakley goggles on. When I took them off she was blown away that it was me. We began talking for a little bit but she seemed totally awkward. I asked how she was, she said fine? She asked if I'm back home I said yes!

She then seemed a little put off by my presence I think. I mean I tried to reach out to her several times after I got back almost two years ago and she never returned my call.

Would you guys even bother to reach out to her? Would you text her saying "Hey, it was nice seeing you at the race today." Or should I just forget about it. I spoke to my friend about this because I was just like wow when I saw her. He told me not to bother reaching out. And if she wants to reach out to you she will, my number didn't change. Any help greatly appreciated.


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 12, 2016 10:49 pm 
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Just send her that text. The worst that can happen is she doesn't respond and then you'll be at the exact same place as you were if you didn't text. If you don't text you'll never know. It's possible she liked/likes you and felt nervous seeing you again after so long.

Also, is it possible her number changed?


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 12, 2016 11:19 pm 
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Just send her that text. The worst that can happen is she doesn't respond and then you'll be at the exact same place as you were if you didn't text. If you don't text you'll never know. It's possible she liked/likes you and felt nervous seeing you again after so long.

Also, is it possible her number changed?

Thanks man!

I ended up texting her and said this...

Me: Hey (name) It's (Me). Not sure if you have the same phone number but, thought I'd say great to see you out there racing today. Small world, surprised I ran into you.

Her: (Few Hrs Later) Hey (Name) Same! Nice to run into you, and thanks for coming by to say hello. Very kind.

That's it. I didn't say anything else and not sure if I should or want to. Thoughts appreciated.


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 12, 2016 11:34 pm 
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First decide whether you want to or not. My sense is you do, but you're worried about her not responding or rejecting you. Be clear about what you want for yourself first, before you send the text.

If you do want to see her, I'd say text her again, but wait 1 day, maybe 2 at most. Let her think about you a bit, and if she was in fact nervous when she saw you, she might want to take it a bit slow. Start with something simple, like, "hey how's it going?" Ask her something about racing or whatever else you might have in common. Keep it short and fairly neutral.

If she responds, text her back, maybe have a little back and forth, but don't wait too long before you say something like "I was thinking that it would be nice to catch up over a drink. Would love to hear what you've been up to in these last two years. Let me know if you're free to chill anytime soon."

Then you can go from there.

Let me know what you think and if you do this, tell me how it goes.


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2016 12:17 am 
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First decide whether you want to or not. My sense is you do, but you're worried about her not responding or rejecting you. Be clear about what you want for yourself first, before you send the text.

If you do want to see her, I'd say text her again, but wait 1 day, maybe 2 at most. Let her think about you a bit, and if she was in fact nervous when she saw you, she might want to take it a bit slow. Start with something simple, like, "hey how's it going?" Ask her something about racing or whatever else you might have in common. Keep it short and fairly neutral.

If she responds, text her back, maybe have a little back and forth, but don't wait too long before you say something like "I was thinking that it would be nice to catch up over a drink. Would love to hear what you've been up to in these last two years. Let me know if you're free to chill anytime soon."

Then you can go from there.

Let me know what you think and if you do this, tell me how it goes.

It would be fun to hangout with her again! It's been two years and the last times we were together it was amazing every time. I met her biking in a park two years ago. At the time I was going away to California on Business and we only hungout for 1 1/2 months which were the best.

Her last text was...

Her: (Few Hrs Later) Hey (Name) Same! Nice to run into you, and thanks for coming by to say hello. Very kind.

Whats the best way to go from here? And you suggested waiting a day or two to text back to this response?


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2016 12:31 am 
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Yeah, I would wait a day or two. She didn't ask you any questions or seem to want to keep the convo going right now, so that's why I'm saying go a bit slow. It does seem like she was happy to see you though and that she was glad you spoke to her. Maybe just text back a smile emoticon or something short to cap off the convo for now. And then follow up in a day or two.

It sounds like it was a positive experience for both of you when you were together. I would definitely try to hang again and I'm sure she wants to as well from everything you've said, unless she's in a relationship. But you may want to subtly ask if she's seeing someone before you ask her out. Or if you know someone who knows her, find out from them.

Good luck and keep me posted!


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2016 12:48 am 
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Yeah, I would wait a day or two. She didn't ask you any questions or seem to want to keep the convo going right now, so that's why I'm saying go a bit slow. It does seem like she was happy to see you though and that she was glad you spoke to her. Maybe just text back a smile emoticon or something short to cap off the convo for now. And then follow up in a day or two.

It sounds like it was a positive experience for both of you when you were together. I would definitely try to hang again and I'm sure she wants to as well from everything you've said, unless she's in a relationship. But you may want to subtly ask if she's seeing someone before you ask her out. Or if you know someone who knows her, find out from them.

Good luck and keep me posted!
Great advice man _/\_ I'll keep you posted for sure! I don't plan on leaving an emoticon text though. Was thinking I'll just shoot another text over after my race which is toward the end of the month. Start a conversation that will lead somewhere. Or is that to late? I say this because I believe she may be at this race as well. Also we met on Easter Sunday two years ago hahaaha. Freakin movie I tell you.


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2016 1:04 am 
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Haha, yeah, maybe holding off on the emoticon is for the best. Yeah, that sounds like a good plan. The race is a good reason to get in touch. Whether you want to wait that long is really up to you, what you want and what kind of tone you want to set. Do whatever feels right for you, but don't hold back because of fear. If you want to see her earlier and are thinking about her, then maybe get in touch sooner. If you wanna be a little more casual about it and give it some time, then wait.

I think it's gonna be good though, whatever you end up doing. Good luck.


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2016 1:06 am 
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And the Easter Sunday thing. Yeah, that's crazy. Maybe a good reason to wait a bit. Listen to what your gut says though.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 15, 2016 1:13 am 
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And the Easter Sunday thing. Yeah, that's crazy. Maybe a good reason to wait a bit. Listen to what your gut says though.
I may have been possibly blown off.

So I decided to reach out to her today. I did it when I got in a little after 7pm. I haven't heard anything just yet, and not surprised. When I got back from the best coast last year I tried to reach out to her and she didn't get back at all. Then I see her at the race lol. Well idk, it was worth a shot though, and she may still get back to me. Will keep you posted as well as the everyone else on the finale.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 15, 2016 5:34 am 
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Her: (Few Hrs Later) Hey (Name) Same! Nice to run into you, and thanks for coming by to say hello. Very kind.
I say these kinds of things when I want to end the conversation.

IMHO, no response is better, as that can mean a boyfriend, not quite sure, etc. This is a door closing politely.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 15, 2016 8:22 am 
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 15, 2016 10:49 am 
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Absolutely nothing at all to lose, which is why I contacted back. Well it's been overnight and yeah I can consider that door being closed. She probably has a boyfriend now. Oh well, it was nice to see she her none the less... life goes on.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 15, 2016 2:09 pm 
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I'm gonna guess and say she has a bf.


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PostPosted: Tue Mar 15, 2016 7:50 pm 
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"Hey, it was nice seeing you at the race today.".
Maybe.

But you definitely don't want to say that.

And she wasn't put off by your presence as much as she were put off by the unstableness of your frame from the shock you experienced from not seeing her for a while and from pedastaling her hotness because of the randomness of the situation.

Why do you want to contact her anyway? If you haven't already that is..

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