So I dated this girl for about 9 months... she decides to break up about 1.5 months ago. She said she was too asfixiated by the relationship. We ended in good terms.
Upon the breakup I ended all type of contact with her (famous 31 day no contact rule) and started going out with other girls and so on..

Well finally I reinitiated contact with her a few days ago and she was like: "being away from you is being harder than I thought,.,, and with all the good memories going around. Very very difficult to be honest. I know that from what Ive seen on you social networks you seem to have "moved on" but well, maybe for me is taking much longer than I expected to move on...

I want to get this girl back. We have set up to go out for drinks tonight so itll be first time we see each other after the breakup. My plan is to act cool and even if she tries to bring the breakup topics up Ill just be like hey, I know you are probably still rattled, but to be honest...I am enjoying this moment with you right now. Lets enjoy this first.

The idea is to try and re initiate attraction and romance and focus only on the good memories not the bad ones. The question is: providing i get the proper iois and kino is going well shouls I try to have sex tonight or do a K close or anything? Or should I just play it cool and pull back at the end of the date?

Thanks for the comments.

Bang her guts flat, that's why she agreed to meet up. Keep the emotional bullshit at bay.

Make sure you bounce to your place at the end. Have her favorite beverage on hand.

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I personally don't think a night out for drinks is the best way to reconnect with a old chick. Not that I think that there is any place to reconnect with an old chick. Going backwards only proves to show her that you didn't move on. And her reinterest in you is largely due to the fact that she thinks you have. So once the "reconnect" wears off, all that will be left is the reality. Did you or did you not truly move on?

Did she contact you at all during those 31 days? And did you just ignore?

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Well she was out of the country, I wrote her an email right after the breakup saying look, I learnt a lot from our relationship I am moving on, I hope we can be friends along the way... she replied very positively, saying this is very hard for me, I had to delete you from fb because it makes me miss you more, etc etc... and after that 31 days of no contact... and Last week I was the one who re-initiated contact with a small text along the lines of:

" I was just a while ago with someone is now learning how to swim... it reminded me of that time we were at the resort and you didn't want to get away from the side of the pool haha I hope you are doing well "

She replied positively and after said something like:

Can I ask you something? Did you just contact me to say that you were reminded of me?

after 5 minutes of not replying to the text:

" Don't even bother answering... Well maybe this is normal to you... and I am happy for you, except for me, being away from you is being harder than I thought,.,, and with all the good memories going around. Very very difficult to be honest. I know that from what you wrote on your email you "moved on" but well, maybe for me is taking much longer than I expected to move on... Anyways, I just wanted to let you know that I am glad to see that you are doing fine and going out with other girls but to be honest the last thing I want is for you to be writing me if you don't want anything..."

long story short, we went for a few drinks and went back to my place.. she had a few gifts that she brought me from her trip... we had sex.. she kept trying to bring up the "seriously, we need to talk" topic, and I kept saying we are enjoying the moment, let's not talk about it right now.

To be honest, I did really move in the sense that I know what went wrong in the first place and I know what I want and don't want from the relationship, but of course I still have feelings for her, otherwise I wouldn't have re-initiated contact. And I agree, I don't want this to feel like a temporary re-connect feeling and letting it wear off after a few dates... what do you recommend?

Always move forward in life. Not backward.

Also, what Eddie said.

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How to keep a girl.

When you date a lot, sometimes you come to the realization that a couple of the girls in the past are rising above the others (physically, in bed, intelligence, quirks, complete package, etc).

If you want her, get her back.

Good job IMHO on focusing on the moment, just having fun, and not whining. Let her bring up the feelings and "the talk".

Go for what you want in life. While I agree moving forward in life is best, sometimes we end up leaving superior women in the wake as we look for fresh water.

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Alright bro.

First things first, stop falling for the bait. I know it looks like a tasty worm hovering and doing the jig in the ocean, but the truth of the matter is there is a sharpened hook connected to that worm. And that moment you take your bite, you'll wish you hadn't.

She's giving you the manipulative " oh if you're not going to give me what i want GET AWAY". Its classic and typical. The reality is, she feels like she got the shorter end of the stick and she's not too happy about it. If she was smart enough to not have sex with you, you would really be losing your mind. Theres levels, but on that note man, I'd instruct you to keep your distance. You are going to find a more attractive and higher quality woman. Now I know you don't want to wait, when you could just have this girl, but its worth. Learn the lesson now so you don't have to later. When you let go before you have to, because foresight informs you that it's not worth it you will be rewarded.

You seen her again, you had sex with her now keep it at bay. Don't under estimate the power of the turned tables of emotion. Just because you may be feeling confident today like " man.. I can handle this. " doesn't mean the right set of word, gentle touch, or succession of orgasms and loss of semen can't propel your emotions into another direction. A direction that wouldn't leave the longer end of he stick on your end. Read my first response again and go forward.

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Thanks for all the replies!

She did try to bring up the "talk" topic the other day over text... I have been trying to keep things light and friendly. My final response on the topic was: Look, we are overthinking things too much. We have only seen each other once so let's just keep it slow.

And Eddie you are probably right about the bait thing... She wants it so bad right now because she is feeling she doesn't have it that easy.