ok so I haven't spoken to an ex in a few months, she messaged me last week asking how I was doing? we did talk on and off after she broke up with me. now I only speak to her if she messages me first. so I replied. it was quite a short conversation but I was wondering why do you think she would randomly message me after a couple of months.

Is she trying to get attention? should I even bother talking to her after this.

How did you break it off? Did you tell her that you're only interested in dating her? If so then you should be trying to set a date as soon as possible. I hope you've never agreed to friendship or anything like that, because I can tell that you want her back.

Either way, I'd be polite. Say something like "Hello. It's great to here from you! When are you free to get together?" if she says no, you say "Ok, well give me a call when you change your mind" but if she says yes, set a definite date for somewhere cool, a few days later... then you don't need to contact her again at all until you're outside her house ready to pick her up.

Let me know how it works.

Any news on the other girls in your life? ...you are involving yourself with other girls, aren't you? Thought so, good job!

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

i keep things cordial with the ex, usually they just want to snoop around and see how your love life is after the breakup. Exs are super interested in new girls, they want to know details even if it makes them jealous, etc. it also serves as validation, "Oh he couldn't even get a girl after we broke up so he's not worth much" or "he got a hottie after we broke up, maybe he was a catch!"

it all depends on YOU though, what are you goals, thoughts. do you secretly want her back, then act accordingly. but honestly, she's an Ex for a reason, look to the future dont dwell in the past.

i have zero desire to rekindle romance with my Ex, so when we talk i dont even go down that path. i keep things friendly and maybe rub it in her face a little bit that I'm seeing new women lol.

well she broke it off with me, saying she thought we were like friends. After that I ended up speaking to her on and off it was just friendly. I did say to her I would like to be friends but she never responded and it was never spoken about.

I haven't spoke in months because I didn't think I have much chance so stopped messaging her. Then she just messages out the blue. She could just be friendly I don't know.

I still want her back but only if she still has a bit of interest. I am seeing a few girls just now but none of them are serious.

Check out Corey Wayne. Read the free ebook in the members section of his website (YouTube him) - he'll teach you a few things. Forget this girl until she agrees to a date (which you only ask for the first 2 times she contacts you, because you're not reaching out to her)

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

That's funny I just finished reading his book how to be a 3% man I've learnt so much! Wish I read it years ago. Everything makes more sense. I'm pretty familiar with Corey Wayne's strategy the whole no contact rule and telling her to contact you if she changes her mind.

It's just difficult to tell if she is reaching out as a friend or has sine interest again. I will not be asking her out until she does though.

She's reaching out because she's curious and she's wondering about you. Just keep focusing on yourself, read the book as many times as you can, join a gym, take up a new hobby or get back to an old one, give yourself a makeover. I've got a thread in the relationships section of this forum called "To the guys who want their ex back!" that you should read. It's not some "strategy" or anything, it encourages guys to move on actually, but it also happens to be the thing that will bring a girl back (providing you still have any chance at all)

Don't do it for her though, do it for you.

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I grew out of the dumb shit I used to say on here. Most of my posts don't represent who I am today at all.

I ended up speaking to her tonight online, the chat was just friendly. yeah I definitely intend on reading the book again. I'm a regular gym user so my body is in pretty good shape, I think one thing I need to improve is being more social and my chat. I can be pretty quiet sometimes and i'm sure this was one of the things which put her off.

I don't really know how can you improve your conversation skills, and make yourself more interesting?

It means she's looking for attention. Yes.

How much attention? I don't know.

Ok well she messaged me at 7am, I'm sure that shows she is a bit interested. I'm not sure. My chat has to be good but it's difficult.

Is this the one you went on 8 dates with and wouldn't escalate?

Regardless, I'd say she's just looking for some attention...

Yeah it is that one, at the end of the day I didn't go out of my way to chat to her. I would probably agree that she is just looking for attention.

I'm seeing a few other girls just now. Been on 4 dates with one girl but not sure about her.

Well here's what I bet happened...

She was dating someone else and that didn't work out... so she's looking for some emotional validation by talking to some exes or guys she left hanging.

You're a wise man to be diversifying your interests across several woman. Don't get hung up on this one. You had your shot with her and you know how this'll end again.

I would never get hung up on any one girl. I'm still looking to date as many girls as I can. However I do really like this girl so if she wants to chat i'll chat.

Have you got any advice for my chat?

Really?

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