How do you stop yourself from that dreaded neediness?



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 31 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Get Into The Game: New Forum Members Start Here » General Questions




Author Message
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 7:33 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2014 4:08 am
Posts: 176
Little backstory: This is the first girl i have had sex with (She doesn't know that). And the only one i'm having sex with at the moment. So right from there you can tell where my neediness could be rising from.

Now what happened

My friend with benefits just got back from a trip at night. She went to bed, then right in the morning started talking to me and came over. I figured we would have sex.

We did a lot of the cute playful stuff with kissing and tons of kino.

But then i started escalating to take her cloths off, and she said she wasn't shaved yet because she just got back. I said it didn't matter.

I escalated again, but i got a playful kind of, "nu uh." From her.

This is where i believe i messed up. I went for it a few times and got the same playful response.


Part2: I have a little app called sing where you sing with other people. She knows i have this but i hadn't shown her, nor was i planning on it. During like the last time i tried to escalate she said, "mabye if you show me your singing, "i'll let you."

That's the part that hit me, "I'll let you." That's when i new i fucked up because she has all the power right now and knows it.

This was in the corse of 2:30 hours before she had to leave because her girl friends set up something because they really wanted to see here.

At the end she said, "mabye i'll come over tonight."

It's now the end of the at this moment. And i could really use some help here.

Anyhelp, but a few basic questions are
1. How do i get my power back?
2. Do i need some power back?
3. Did i fuck up bad.

Most importantly!!! How could i fix this? =\

_________________
"There is no failure. Only feedback." ~Robert Allen

My most helpful mentors:
Much thanks too;
Eddie Fews
PEBBLE
R.C.


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 7:45 am 
Offline
English Muffin
User avatar

Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:40 pm
Posts: 5689
You're seriously over thinking this if a joke about an app is responsible for having a power in a casual relationship.

I suggest you turn off game mode and actually just be normal at this point since you're now fucking her.

I do get the feeling that you also could be seeing her way to much, how many times a week do you see/fuck her? This is more of a concern...

Way to often when pick up guys finally get laid, they just want to fuck all day and night everyday of the week till you have scared this one girl away...or worse...you're in a relationship that you didn't want in the 1st place because chasing more girls seems like a chore

_________________
USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR REPEATEDLY IGNORING MOD WARNINGS AND MULTIPLE RULE VIOLATIONS


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 9:46 am 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu May 23, 2013 7:28 am
Posts: 53
An abundance mindset will help a great deal.

But listen to 'god' PEBBLE. He is correct about your situation.


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 9:57 am 
Offline
English Muffin
User avatar

Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:40 pm
Posts: 5689
Quote:
An abundance mindset will help a great deal.

But listen to 'god' PEBBLE. He is correct about your situation.
What dafuq

_________________
USER HAS BEEN BANNED FOR REPEATEDLY IGNORING MOD WARNINGS AND MULTIPLE RULE VIOLATIONS


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 12:10 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu May 23, 2013 7:28 am
Posts: 53
all hail :lol:


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 1:52 pm 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2011 1:53 pm
Posts: 5428
Location: Romania
Quote:
Little backstory: This is the first girl i have had sex with (She doesn't know that). And the only one i'm having sex with at the moment. So right from there you can tell where my neediness could be rising from.

Now what happened

My friend with benefits just got back from a trip at night. She went to bed, then right in the morning started talking to me and came over. I figured we would have sex.

We did a lot of the cute playful stuff with kissing and tons of kino.

But then i started escalating to take her cloths off, and she said she wasn't shaved yet because she just got back. I said it didn't matter.

I escalated again, but i got a playful kind of, "nu uh." From her.

This is where i believe i messed up. I went for it a few times and got the same playful response.


Part2: I have a little app called sing where you sing with other people. She knows i have this but i hadn't shown her, nor was i planning on it. During like the last time i tried to escalate she said, "mabye if you show me your singing, "i'll let you."

That's the part that hit me, "I'll let you." That's when i new i fucked up because she has all the power right now and knows it.

This was in the corse of 2:30 hours before she had to leave because her girl friends set up something because they really wanted to see here.

At the end she said, "mabye i'll come over tonight."

It's now the end of the at this moment. And i could really use some help here.

Anyhelp, but a few basic questions are
1. How do i get my power back?
2. Do i need some power back?
3. Did i fuck up bad.

Most importantly!!! How could i fix this? =\
You're quite prone to mental masturbation aren't you?

Try to live in the moment. Most guys fuck it up during intense sessions of overthinking and ridiculous amounts of reacting to would be situations. Your can have an absolute major fuckup today and next week it will be all but forgotten if you don't let that particular event dictate your future behavior.

Women respond to how you make them feel. And how you make them feel is largely based on how you feel internally about various things.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.


Top
   
PostPosted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 2:10 pm 
Offline
Read My Book
User avatar

Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2013 8:08 pm
Posts: 5028
Website: http://www.EddieFews.com
Location: New York City
You're tripping balls over nothing.

She's in charge of the pussy, but thats only because you're willing to do too much for it. You're putting it on a pedestal and in response she's treating you like its worth something. The more and more your frame feels like "pussy is nothing. Its no big deal" and/or " If she withholds on sex and leaves me horny, I'll get up and leave and never come back" or anything similar your friend will suggest to her that she can control you to some degree with it.

You're still just starting out though man so its no biggy. You may still have a couple heart breaks awaiting you until you're fully ready to tackle this so just be patient with yourself.

Theres no need to power struggle, you can just chill. But if you want to play that game, just beware that to regain "power" you have to be willing to take a loss. For example: What you could do is just next initiate texting, and when she finally texts you ignore it. Ignore the first one and respond to her the second time around. They always try at least twice.

I'd advise you just to chill though. As the male that remains confident and on his square, your natural position will resume on its own. Desperation is quick sand though, so let go and just relax for now.

_________________
Need Coaching? For 1 on 1 Coaching via SPAM, Phone or Instant Messenger - Email: EddieFews@Gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: 'The Secret Laws Of Social Wisdom - Click Here

http://www.EddieFews.com


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Jul 25, 2015 8:19 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2014 4:08 am
Posts: 176
Quote:
You're seriously over thinking this if a joke about an app is responsible for having a power in a casual relationship.

I suggest you turn off game mode and actually just be normal at this point since you're now fucking her.

I do get the feeling that you also could be seeing her way to much, how many times a week do you see/fuck her? This is more of a concern...

Way to often when pick up guys finally get laid, they just want to fuck all day and night everyday of the week till you have scared this one girl away...or worse...you're in a relationship that you didn't want in the 1st place because chasing more girls seems like a chore
I think so too. I see her like 3-4 times a week. The neediness is a big thing i'm working on. Slowly i do feel like i'm pushing her away because of this. She really wants to keep the relation ship, fuck, and friendship. But i can't help but build up feeling

_________________
"There is no failure. Only feedback." ~Robert Allen

My most helpful mentors:
Much thanks too;
Eddie Fews
PEBBLE
R.C.


Top
   
PostPosted: Sat Jul 25, 2015 8:26 am 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title

Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2013 6:34 pm
Posts: 3993
Quote:
Quote:
You're seriously over thinking this if a joke about an app is responsible for having a power in a casual relationship.

I suggest you turn off game mode and actually just be normal at this point since you're now fucking her.

I do get the feeling that you also could be seeing her way to much, how many times a week do you see/fuck her? This is more of a concern...

Way to often when pick up guys finally get laid, they just want to fuck all day and night everyday of the week till you have scared this one girl away...or worse...you're in a relationship that you didn't want in the 1st place because chasing more girls seems like a chore
I think so too. I see her like 3-4 times a week. The neediness is a big thing i'm working on. Slowly i do feel like i'm pushing her away because of this. She really wants to keep the relation ship, fuck, and friendship. But i can't help but build up feeling
see her less

hang w your boys

do your own thing, be cool with being by yourself


Top
   
PostPosted: Sun Jul 26, 2015 7:46 pm 
Offline
Dedicated Member
User avatar

Joined: Sat Dec 05, 2009 6:04 pm
Posts: 572
Location: Miami
Solution to neediness: Create a life in which YOU are self sufficient.

And yes, that includes OPTIONS with women.

neediness... ew.

Too bad is SO common.

Here a simple mind flick you can use to annihilate neediness

Create a plan of action for yourself...a success vision.. and focus on making that happen.

Ill use myself as an example...

Me and an EX ended. I was naturally devastated and had extreme needy feelings.

I created a plan of abundance and success.

Now every girl wants the D.

Why? because i have options and game.

Better game is a byproduct of options(abundance).

And options eliminates neediness.

And no i didnt just sit there, i went and did what i needed to do, wether is approach women, hit the gym, SUCCEED in my CAREER. All of that comes together to make you an abundance monster.

You can do what i just mentioned above and become a fucking WINNER...

Or you can sit there crying like a little bitch about ONE girl who you will NEVER get, and even if you did you'd still be a bitch cause you didnt grow as a man. *newsflash*

Which will you choose?

_________________
8) Watch me infield-Daygame- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgRD7iY ... 7niIVvQTeA

-8+ Years In the PUA Community.

-Chat with me on SPAM for free Q&A
SPAM: Laz1Love

-Dating Redefined

~TheSingleLifeMiami~


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 10 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link