Bad boy: Is it possible to be too bad



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PostPosted: Thu Mar 26, 2015 7:13 am 
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I have had the experience numerous times, with different women I am seeing where they get extremely angry and call me out. More or less, they call me an arrogant unsympathetic asshole. Furthermore, these women are not serious girl friends but women I see casually. The arguments are not over anything particular so much as who I am as a person.

Some other issues are that after closing or getting physical, some of these women act odd and distant. In these cases, there is not any argument, but I feel a strange vibe coming from them. It's not a big deal If It's a one night stand, but some of these women it is after several interactions.

A good amount of the time, the women initiate the attraction. A lot of the time they invite me to hang out the them, or invite themselves to some party or event I am going to. Other times, the interaction involves them continuously contacting me, and I in turn invite them. Sometimes its more of just the signals they sent.

I curious If a bad boy can be too bad in some cases. IDK seems like my approach to life and women causes a lot of emotional turmoil that I only become slightly aware of after the fact. Or perhaps there a just women that want a short term fling and get confused about how to proceed after it. IDK Im sure as hell confused sometimes, specially since it feels as if I did not do anything wrong.

^Above is my main question.
vBelow just added some further detail about the type of person I am, and what women may be responding to.


The whole bad boy persona came to me naturally. During the later part of my teenage years I moved from a large urban city to a small city in Utah. Over 90& of the population was Mormon, which means they were extremely religious and conservative. I do not believe in Mormonism (personally I think it's false), and am a very liberal person. That being said, I was always an outsider, and the general population was an easy target to rebel against.

As a result I developed these character traits to the extreme:
-I don't give a shit what other people say or think about me
-I am blunt, direct, and honest about what I have to say and what I believe (even if it offends people)
-I do what I want, even if it violates social norms
-I am prideful about my views and opinions, and rarely back down
-Pretty much not giving a fuck


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 26, 2015 7:23 am 
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Being too much of anything can be detrimental. Too "nice", too "bad", too "passive", too "aggressive", take your pick. What starts out as charming, cute or attractive can get really old really fast if overdone.

Sometimes you have to calibrate, but do so within your core personality boundaries. Meaning that if you're a "bad boy", calibration doesn't mean turning nice. It just means toning it down a bit from time to time when appropriate.

Either way you're polarizing and women have no alternative but to feel something towards you. That's always a good thing.

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 26, 2015 7:34 am 
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Perhaps too "bad" and too "aggressive." Although I feel its the firey wild free-spirit side of me that attracts women in the first at least in the moment.

Maybe tone it down on subsequent interactions?


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 26, 2015 8:30 am 
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There's no real pattern to this, it's not an exact science, more like an artform. But if you're consistently getting these reactions, experiment with it. Tone down like you said and see how it goes.

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I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 30, 2015 4:58 pm 
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Recently, I have been polarizing my attitude/vibe during interactions. I will act domineering, blunt, and forward, and then switch up to a much softer emotional state for a brief period of time. The soft emotional stuff sometimes feels odd, but since its brief and opposite of what I am usually like, it seems to be working.


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