asked girl out over fb, what did I do wrong?



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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2017 6:36 pm 
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The Grand Puba
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Location: Los Angeles
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Why pretend to be a guy with options when you aren't one though? I get that you guys are trying to push guys like me to become guys with options but it's so hard. I'm even on day 16 of the no fap challenge and I told myself I'm going to talk to any hot girl on campus on my way to class/gym/whatever but I pussied out like a little bitch on so many occasions. Not fapping just cure approach anxiety apparently. My friends are kinda lame and study all the time and don't go out so I barely get a chance to meet girls. I have to go out to shit like school clubs and events by myself.
What are you afraid of when you think about approaching girls?

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 30, 2017 8:04 pm 
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Why pretend to be a guy with options when you aren't one though?
Because it's better to start changing your mentality right now. And by acting like you have options, you'll begin creating options.
Quote:
I get that you guys are trying to push guys like me to become guys with options but it's so hard. I'm even on day 16 of the no fap challenge
I know a lot of guys here suggest this, but I wouldn't go that long. It fucks with your head...especially if you aren't getting laid. It's not a science-based plan.


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My friends are kinda lame and study all the time and don't go out so I barely get a chance to meet girls. I have to go out to shit like school clubs and events by myself.
What's lame is relying on friends to go out and meet women. That's a weak-ass herd mentality.

Take a look at nature. Look at the huge bull elk and moose. These animals often wander the woods alone, doing their own thing. They don't have time for the fucking moose and elk fraternity. They do their shit, they lead, and the cow moose and cow elk chase them. Be the bull, not the insecure little fraternity boy that needs a posse.

Hit the gym. Approach women.

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PostPosted: Tue Jan 31, 2017 8:41 am 
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Joined: Thu Oct 13, 2011 1:53 pm
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Why pretend to be a guy with options when you aren't one though?
This is not about pretending, it's about implementing a mindset. How do you expect to evolve if you keep doing the things that hold you back?
The difference between you and me is not that I have options. It's that I would've stopped talking or thinking about that girl the moment she sent that reply. I don't care if I had 5 other girls blowing up my phone or if I were on a 6 month long dry spell.
Quote:
I get that you guys are trying to push guys like me to become guys with options but it's so hard. I'm even on day 16 of the no fap challenge and I told myself I'm going to talk to any hot girl on campus on my way to class/gym/whatever but I pussied out like a little bitch on so many occasions. Not fapping just cure approach anxiety apparently. My friends are kinda lame and study all the time and don't go out so I barely get a chance to meet girls. I have to go out to shit like school clubs and events by myself.
You can talk to women on campus, at the gym, at the grocery store, in the library, at parties and literally any other place women are at.
Your problem is simply letting your fear of rejection get the best of you.
You think we never had it? You think we didn't have excuses holding us back?

This is not about having no fears, it's about acting in spite of them.

Also, use tinder when you're not out approaching.

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 1:55 pm 
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Joined: Thu Apr 03, 2014 5:00 am
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Jack I am afraid of getting embarrassing shot down in public. But I'm slowly learning to not care. My friend is pushing day game on to me. I have a simple line I use:

"Hi, this is probably gonna sound random, but I just wanted to tell you that you're very cute/pretty/gorgeous/whatever."

I'm gonna mix it up and throw in specific compliments like "your hair is gorgeous instead of you're very cute" if possible. This is my low commitment compliment and walk routine so that opening is less terrifying. But my friend says to stay in the set until she walks away so I'll do that.

Arch, as much as I'd like to free myself from my no fap torment (been a full 3 weeks now...), I really think it's no fap that inspired me to even approach girls on campus in the first place. Could be placebo but I feel like a better man than 3 weeks ago. I feel way more confident and socially aware. This is the longest I've ever gone in the last 12 years without seeing ANY porn. Not even a picture of a naked girl. And I think it's great! Girls just seem so much hotter in general, and I'm starting to notice some 5s and 6s I would not have noticed before. Although it's really with my sleep and I can't seem to sleep more than 3-4 hours at a time without waking up, I really don't want to go back.

RC I am definitely gonna act in spite of my fears. I won't walk around campus hunting for girls, but say I'm on my way to class or the gym I see a cute girl the goal is to not bitch out and go talk to her. As for Tinder, I used it three years ago, had pretty bad pictures. Got 0 matches. Never used it again. I would say I'm good looking for a 5'8 Asian guy. But I'm a 5'8 Asian guy. And I have no good pictures at all. People never take pictures of me so I have literally my current Facebook profile pic I can use which is kind of a far shot of me. I'd definitely use Tinder. Wouldn't cry about getting 0 matches again if it happens. Just don't have pictures and don't think it's worth paying $$$ to get some professional pictures.


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