gf never initiates contact but always willing to meet up



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PostPosted: Fri Dec 11, 2015 5:27 pm 
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Nothing. Just proving a point. You're talking about her level of commitment towards him (which in your mind is presumably low) based solely on her lack of initiating contact. Yet the reality is she's giving him her time by hanging out with him in person - which is, the last time I checked far more of a commitment than any lack of initiating a phone conversation.
Maybe she likes free drinks? Free dinner?

That's why he needs to tell us if he's slept with her.

It's just a forum, bud... you don't need to get salty cause I don't agree with you. I don't get angry when you don't agree with me...
Not salty, or upset with you. I don't know what prompted you to feel that way.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 14, 2015 12:36 pm 
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Nothing. Just proving a point. You're talking about her level of commitment towards him (which in your mind is presumably low) based solely on her lack of initiating contact. Yet the reality is she's giving him her time by hanging out with him in person - which is, the last time I checked far more of a commitment than any lack of initiating a phone conversation.
Pbht. I know a chick that would go out with friends, and after that call a dude and "commit her time" to him just because she knew he'd pay the cab home (since they live in walking distance of each other) and whatever food/drinks she felt she wanted at the time.

Granted the guy was filthy rich, but that's largely irrelevant since all he ever got from her was a kiss on the cheek and a pat on the shoulder.
So yes, it matters.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 14, 2015 1:59 pm 
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so i have been dating this peculiar girl for the last few month.she never flakes every time i ask to meet her and when we do we spend a lot of time together.we are in some sort of a relationship but she never initiates contact or plans.i have to do everything and frankly it is bothering me.is she stringing me along?does she have so many orbiters who text her that she forgets about me?she says she loves me but i doubt that.How do you know a girl really loves you?

To echo what RC asked....
DID YOU HAVE SEX?


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2015 10:50 pm 
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update:we were to meet up yesterday.she flaked saying she was ill.hours later i saw her somewhere.i confronted her about this and told her to apologize.she said she won't and that i am overreacting.i don't think she is keen on our relationship.instead of saying sorry for lying to me she started accusing me of overreacting


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 18, 2015 11:32 pm 
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update:we were to meet up yesterday.she flaked saying she was ill.hours later i saw her somewhere.i confronted her about this and told her to apologize.she said she won't and that i am overreacting.i don't think she is keen on our relationship.instead of saying sorry for lying to me she started accusing me of overreacting
lol how do you make someone apologize?

You're basically manipulating the person to say what you want to hear.

You sound suffocating to be with, and likely with all this you're just pushing her away and she's becoming indifferent towards you and the relationship. In other words, you're making her mind up for her.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2015 1:41 am 
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You call her your girlfriend but you still haven't said whether you are sleeping with her or not.

You are being overly needy and repressive.

And you don't need to.

Why don't you treat her fair for a change? You've been the one who has been.. annoyed and accusative.

Apparently you are not getting any? Why don't you say so?

Why not treat her well and take her to a bath (preferably, yours). Why not take a nice shower with her.

If she is "flaking" (how does your very own girlfriend "flake", really?) it is because you have been oppressive.

This girl just needs quiet. Why do you want more from her?

I'm a bit angry with you. "She tells me she loves me but I don't believe her." What? Wha? You're now going to be a needy bastard just because "the signs" tell you she is not into you?

This is rational thinking dude this is not the truth. Someone told you that. It doesn't live up to your fairytale. That is my "gest" in the matter. You can be angry with me as well.

At this stage in time I would only be interested in having sex with her. Why do you even want "relationship goodies"? You're in a relationship but you refuse to answer whether you are having sex. Yes, become angry. Be mad at me.

Be angry with her (a slight bit) and then be angry with yourself and then realise how foolish you are? What are you throwing away exactly?


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2015 2:05 am 
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You should be letting her do at least 75% of the initiating. If she's not, it's because you're doing it too much. I once had this exact same problem, until somebody asked me how often I message first... and I replied "every day." Can you see the problem there?

You're probably doing exactly what I did. You should be busy with your life and letting her do the chasing, as women like to do.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2015 6:22 am 
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You call her your girlfriend but you still haven't said whether you are sleeping with her or not.

You are being overly needy and repressive.

And you don't need to.

Why don't you treat her fair for a change? You've been the one who has been.. annoyed and accusative.

Apparently you are not getting any? Why don't you say so?

Why not treat her well and take her to a bath (preferably, yours). Why not take a nice shower with her.

If she is "flaking" (how does your very own girlfriend "flake", really?) it is because you have been oppressive.

This girl just needs quiet. Why do you want more from her?

I'm a bit angry with you. "She tells me she loves me but I don't believe her." What? Wha? You're now going to be a needy bastard just because "the signs" tell you she is not into you?

This is rational thinking dude this is not the truth. Someone told you that. It doesn't live up to your fairytale. That is my "gest" in the matter. You can be angry with me as well.

At this stage in time I would only be interested in having sex with her. Why do you even want "relationship goodies"? You're in a relationship but you refuse to answer whether you are having sex. Yes, become angry. Be mad at me.

Be angry with her (a slight bit) and then be angry with yourself and then realise how foolish you are? What are you throwing away exactly?
she is very conservative.i didn't want to rush her i am talking it slowly but opportunities did arise and it was a case of me not capitalizing and not her willing to not give it up.and yes we haven't had sex.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 19, 2015 11:05 pm 
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Quote:
You call her your girlfriend but you still haven't said whether you are sleeping with her or not.

You are being overly needy and repressive.

And you don't need to.

Why don't you treat her fair for a change? You've been the one who has been.. annoyed and accusative.

Apparently you are not getting any? Why don't you say so?

Why not treat her well and take her to a bath (preferably, yours). Why not take a nice shower with her.

If she is "flaking" (how does your very own girlfriend "flake", really?) it is because you have been oppressive.

This girl just needs quiet. Why do you want more from her?

I'm a bit angry with you. "She tells me she loves me but I don't believe her." What? Wha? You're now going to be a needy bastard just because "the signs" tell you she is not into you?

This is rational thinking dude this is not the truth. Someone told you that. It doesn't live up to your fairytale. That is my "gest" in the matter. You can be angry with me as well.

At this stage in time I would only be interested in having sex with her. Why do you even want "relationship goodies"? You're in a relationship but you refuse to answer whether you are having sex. Yes, become angry. Be mad at me.

Be angry with her (a slight bit) and then be angry with yourself and then realise how foolish you are? What are you throwing away exactly?
she is very conservative.i didn't want to rush her i am talking it slowly but opportunities did arise and it was a case of me not capitalizing and not her willing to not give it up.and yes we haven't had sex.
"Not wanting to rush her" and trying to "take it slowly" is literally the WORSE thing you can do in this situation.

You have fucking needs. And you are the man. I'm not saying to FORCE her to have sex, but you should be leading the interaction towards having sex. Because if you don't, someone else will.


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 20, 2015 8:11 pm 
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Damn brother take it down a notch she sounds like a feminine woman who expects the man to make plans. As Ween says "Don't Sweat It"

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 21, 2015 8:52 am 
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- Haven't had sex
- Calls it a relationship

You are her orbiter.

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 5:17 pm 
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update:after she flaked we had a little arguement and she told me she will meet me when she feels like.I told her that was rude and she then texted am not in the mood to talk to you don't text me because i won't read your messages.afrer that i froze her out for two days.she texted with a sad emoticon i engaged her we talked for a while and then she asked me to fix her phone.at first i thought she was texting to apologize or because she missed i guess she just wanted me to fix her phone lol.i told her i can't of course.we haven't talked since then.my gut feeling is that she is just trying to use me.what to do? should i call her on trying to use me or just play her too.i want to play her but i don't know how to do that


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 5:23 pm 
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update:after she flaked we had a little arguement and she told me she will meet me when she feels like.I told her that was rude and she then texted am not in the mood to talk to you don't text me because i won't read your messages.afrer that i froze her out for two days.she texted with a sad emoticon i engaged her we talked for a while and then she asked me to fix her phone.at first i thought she was texting to apologize or because she missed i guess she just wanted me to fix her phone lol.i told her i can't of course.we haven't talked since then.my gut feeling is that she is just trying to use me.what to do? should i call her on trying to use me or just play her too.i want to play her but i don't know how to do that
Find another girl.

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 22, 2015 6:07 pm 
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Time to pick up some girls. Try to have sex with them this time before you can put a label on anything.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 26, 2015 7:38 am 
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Don't worry about it. She's just taking it slow, doesn't wanna rush the apology. :lol:

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