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I need some helping ideas with a married girl from my workplace, but a different department.

I have never thought about dating a married woman, but this happened now and I'm not interested in discussing the subject of married women.She comes from a very conservative, traditional and controlling family and environment, her husband is perhaps the only man in her life and maybe she fantasizes something else, but as I told, I'm not interested in discussing the question here.

Sher works there for about 5 years. However no contact of any kind ever happened except crossing each other occasionally in the building and ignoring each other. She's almost never alone, having some girlfriend co-workers with her, like me who usually have a female co-worker with me.

She's gorgeous. I know nothing about her life, but 2 years ago I heard people commenting about her soon-to-be marriage. Some 6 months later when we crossed in a place we were both alone I was surprised with her "Hi" and just had time to reciprocate her another "Hi".

There were only two more occasion for a "Hi" in the next few months, and some eye contact, but only when it's safe, something that seldom happens. Then she got pregnant, went for a 10-month maternity leave and now returned, 2 months ago. I'm happy that she's as beautiful and her body is as perfect as ever before.

During her license, I could find her mobile number in the national directory, something she may not be aware of (mine isn't and that's unusual for someone to have the number in the directory).

She lives not far from the workplace, and I live some 30 miles away in another town. I know where she lives, but don't think it's a good idea to walk in her area.

There's no place in the workplace where we don't risk being caught. So even stopping for a few seconds can be risky.

Some weeks ago I crossed her when she was talking to her boss in a hall (the boss standing and her sit, me crossing alone), she was so embarrassed, perhaps fearing I could say some "hello" that she got up a little clumsy and left her water bottle fall to the floor.

Today we crossed on the building entrance and exchanged our "hi", she smiling very friendly.

The only way we could meet is in my place or a motel, of course. I live alone, so there's no such problem with my place.

The question is how to have contact with her.

I think that using her number (she doesn't know I have) may make her feel unsafe and she doesn't have my number, which would require some introducing texts that might complicate further. Unless there's a safe discreet way to do it.

That's what I invite you here, some ideas and suggestions on the subject




.

Why can't you have a conversation with her? Is there some sort of rule of where coworkers can't speak to other coworkers or men aren't allowed to talk to women?

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Hi, Jack, thanks. Of course there's no such rule. That's simply not a place large enough and she only interacts with her circle, all of which know her well, so an outsider will be highly noticed and embarrassing. This is the situation.

This is the problem for you guys that are here and primarily focused on one girl. You care about what others think. You're on a pick-up artist forum. One of the primary things that we do is walk up to a woman and talk to them. If they are there in a group, we may talk to the whole group before focusing our attention on any specific person in that group.

Forget that you have her phone number...you will creep her out.

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Boom.

Guys: Go up to the women and speak to them. They won't bite. They may just like it.

I'm happy with your replies and thankful for your interest. I know I'm in a PUA forum, even though this question is concrete and not a question on PUA tactics.

I've learned a lot from PUA books, including LaRuina, and I know you always have another woman ahead over and over again and that's cool, but at times you can be focused in one for pure mental reasons, of course.

This is the case and I thought a PUA forum was the best place to have some practical help.

I'm new here and maybe this isn't the best sub-forum for the question?

To have success with individual target you would have needed to build up your social skill sets far before encountering one. Imagine you've never played basketball a day in your life, but then you were given an opportunity to hit a half court shot for 100,000 Dollars.. And you came to a basketball forum saying " Guys, I read books about basketball, but i've never actually played. I have to hit a half court shot this friday. How do I do it? "

All we can tell you is what you've already read. And wish you luck. You have to have experience prior to the moment to be prepared to success at it. Individual targets take a greater level of expertise. Especially a situation like this one. Now if you had taken 10,000 half court shots in the past, you would be ready for that moment. Theres no magic pill for experience. Hell, I don't know why you would want to ruin someones marriage to satisfy your selfish desires anyway, but thats on you.

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Thanks for the interest and comments.

I've used what I've learned many times before.

I'm not interested in discussing morals or philosophical questions.

I place here a concrete difficult question that needs some imagination and I believe PUA people can help.

It's always a bad sign when a guy waxes poetic about a woman's woe-is-me-past, like he's her White Knight before she even gets on her knees.

This is hyper-analytical to the point of creepiness.


So weird.



WTF.

Uber-weird.

Huh?

This woman has said one word to you. Dump cold water on your head and wake up.


HUH?



Dude, this entire post creeped me out. You got a woman's number without her permission, and are thinking of contacting her with it?

This woman has said "hi" to you, and you're planning out ways to meet her, waiting months while she has a kid?

God damn this forum creeps me out sometimes.

You need to start hanging out with women outside of work. Go to the gym, get some physical confidence, work off the creeper energy. Pick up some decent clothes, and approach women in bars or book stores in warm, friendly ways.

The sub-context of this post says you have very little contact with women outside of work.

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You're not getting it OP. We won't be able to give you an answer on this specific situation because you have too many personal barriers that you are too cowardly to overcome. You are scared of being noticed and embarrassed. If you put limitations on how we can help you based on your fears, then you're wasting time her.

If you have used what you've learned many times before, why is this one girl such a big deal?

EDIT: I have to agree with Arch on the creepiness of how the OP comes across.

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