What you're missing is you said your manic depressed and it sounds like that. I'm telling you if life sucks and this girl provides some release, great, but work on the aspects that suck and cause your depression. Because tying your happiness to a woman or women is not a good idea. Get those support systems so if something goes wrong with her your not crashing as you said.

oh yeah for sure neo..thats actually what ive been trying to preach to myself lately. i CANNOT rely on another person, especially a women, for my happiness. i have to be content when im alone in my own thoughts...i wish i could change my business situation but its not possible at the moment i have 5 mortgages a daughter and countless other bills and business is great so i gotta man up and just deal with it...work is actually my main support system when im depressed i go hard as fuck at work

its just so easier said than done...ive been a sucker for love since before i had hair on my balls lol....i rarely get alot of satisfaction from one night stands or 1-2 week flings, i get drained and usually they get clingy and i have to pull some rude shit and cut them off....i like to be held down in a solid relationship which explains all the LTRs ive been in....